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Lost Love
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Hello Everyone, Let me go straight to the point because honestly Idk what to say at the beginning I am just letting this out because it is on my mind a lot lately
Last year 2022 I met a girl online from Algeria and I am from Egypt we talked and talked a lot actually until we confessed that we liked each other and because we had different cultures and also different languages we had some disagreements but we overcame them.
We literally couldn't sleep without having our headphones stucked into our ears and having ongoing phone call between us we talked 24/7. One day after 2 months we had a big disagreement and I snapped said a lot of things that wasn't supposed to be said and she left.
I can't find her she changed her number she totally disappeared I tried to move on but I couldn't I still love her after more than a year of her leaving I still in love with her I still have hope that one day she will call again. I tried to stick myself in another relationships but I end up leaving because I can't I just can't think of any other girl. I got diagnosed by severe depression and on tons of medications and antidepressants but they seem that they aren't working anymore.
Hope she comes back again...
| 2 |
Little birdie passed in my hands today and I feel awful.
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I was walking home and I saw something bounce off the main road and onto the pavement. I didn’t take notice of it until I got closer and saw that it was a very small bird.
It was lying on its side and maybe looked like it had broken it’s neck I’m not sure. I didn’t want to leave it on the road so I picked it up and was supporting it’s head with my finger. I wasn’t exactly sure on what to do with it. The RPSCA in my area was shut, I’ve just looked online and there was some numbers I could’ve called at the time but I didn’t look hard enough.
While I was walking the bird jumped from my hands and into a bush, I thought maybe it was okay since it did that, i watched it for a bit , but then it rolled over onto its side and it’s body and head ended up in the same position as how I found it. I didn’t want to leave it there so I picked it up again and started walking with it. Then all of a sudden it’s body started twitch, it’s eyes closed and it’s body went completely limp and I realised what happened.
I felt horrible, I had tried to help but maybe I had made it worse by picking it up. I’m not an expert on birds but I maybe it was injured more than what I thought. I felt like crying, I placed it under a tree and walked home but I can’t stop thinking about the bird. How it ended up the roadside to how it passed it must of been in a lot of pain and I hope it’s okay now. Never experienced an animal death before, I had no emotional attachment to the bird so I’m unsure why I feel so crappy but I just needed to get this off my chest.
| 12 |
Just plain numb
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How can I get rid of feelings of being numb? I dont really think I am 'depressed' as I still want to do things I enjoy on occasion but not nearly as much as I used to. I cry almost every day lately. I feel like I am a disappointment in life. I used to self injure, and I had a long streak that I was clean for, but not recently. I'm just so disappointed in myself, I dont know why others wouldnt be either. ☹️😔 Hope i'm not alone in this. I cant ever seem to find a friend to talk to either. I always seem to be the one who wants to vent and talk about my issues, but I'd like to hear what others are going through sometimes too that way I dont feel like its just me all the time, and maybe like i'm crazy or something.
| 2 |
my parents wanna put me in the hospital
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i'm suicidal and yesterday i talked to my therapist about it. i accidentally said too much and she made me tell my parents. the three of them all were talking and said that i have to be under 24/7 supervision. i have to sleep in the same room as my parents and can't be alone for longer than to use the bathroom. they are baby proofing my fucking house. if i don't put up with this, they are gonna admit me to a hospital and i will have to be in inpatient care for a week or so. this fucking sucks, my independence is gone
| 6 |
friends problems
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I ended up hurting someone, I did everything to show her that I wouldn't do it again, but unfortunately she can't believe it, I have to live with little and I still feel bad, I don't know the right thing to do
| 1 |
Yo. (damn, have to use more than 6 characters)
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what would be the quickest (preferably painless, but I know that is most likely not possible) way for me to kill myself. I'm looking at doing this on Monday night, so I got a fair amount of time to think of shit. Like I know stabbing yourself could work, but it's kinda freaky thinking bout that (I also get kinda queasy around blood), but I could do it if I have no other options. And hanging yourself is out of the question, too tall, and my house doesn't have high enough ceilings.
| 1 |
I Understand Now
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Hi, everyone!
You know, i thought this feeling of sadness can be attributed to combination of things like unhealthy lifestyle, self-pity and maybe not getting enough sunlight and etc. And that you can get out of this state of mind by just sucking it up, making myself think that other people are going through tougher situations, hitting the gym and shit.
However I know now that it is more complex than that. I think I fell in love with a girl. I am feeling something new that I never felt before or maybe felt it but not as intense. I think about her all the time, replaying the 30 minute conversation I had with her. I can imagine her mannerisms, body language, and can hear her voice as it is happening in real life at this moment. I can’t get her out of my head.
This is not the sad part though. The sad part is that she is 5 hours away. I did not ask her social media, because I was in the moment and lost myself in that feeling of Love and admiration. I found her Instagram, but I can’t request to be her friend, because I am afraid she will think that I sought her out. We don’t have mutual friends, so it will not fill natural.
I lost all the joy in my life, like it just evaporated. I used to enjoy watching movies and making music and etc. But nothing feels important anymore, like everything I am doing is meaningless without that person in my life. Incredibly sad feeling.
| 1 |
What's the point?
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What's the point in waking up every day to an empty house and an empty inbox? Aging into middle age as a completely invisible nobody, infinitesimally insignificant and forgotten about by everyone?
Tasks fulfilled each day, but for what? For who? Where is any of this going, when every day is another day alone?
I haven't heard from anyone I used to know in years. I stopped exerting the effort; no one exerted the effort to remain connected in return.
How does one reconcile *being* an unessential? Someone who no one checks in on and no one contacts, for any reason? Pointlessly existent, alive because the body hasn't died yet?
How do you open up to strangers about *years* of being alone? How in any way do you make light conversation about that to new people?
| 1 |
The older I become the more schizoid person I become
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I don't know how to stop this tendency. I'm starting to distance myself from my friends. I have so low self that I cannot talking with my only 2 friends. I feel myself insignificant among them. Im becoming alone and alone. Soon I will be without any friends and familiars because of mental issues. My self esteem is unstable. I cannot talking with people because of anxiety. Im being treated whole almost year.
I have fear of people rejection so Im even afraid to make this post. Like I think I will be bullied by people from what I'm typing here.
I have emotional blockade of intellect. I don't know how to communicate with any people. Very often I can to perceive all people say inadequately. Like someone hates me.
If so I apologize for all I can say wrong.
I can having problems with English. I apologize for all mistakes.
I'm Sixteen. Have B.A.D.
| 10 |
Unexisting myself sounds absolutely sound
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When i think from the opposite POV, it stops me and makes me feel that nothing in life can be solved that easily. My soul family from across the Universe needs me back in a way, not to be looking at the glass half empty(honestly I see the glass totally fuc*in empty) My analysis points me in the direction that there is nothing more out here for me. Trust me, ive tried to scrape the bottom to find on why i should stay here. Its not promising. My thoughts are stuck in the wrong vector as being struck with a baseball bat doubling the kinetic energy into dark oblivion. ( I think) . Idk I'm not right
| 1 |
I have a two year plan
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I love my family... my spouse.. our child... and this is the only thing I can do now. I can't support them anymore. I've tried so desperately.
We're drowning in debt and and plagued by costly incurable diseases... I can't keep us above water anymore. I've loyally worked for decades, it's not enough. I've gone to college and earned top marks but had to drop out due repeated emergencies. I've gotten multiple certifications and changed careers. No matter how hard we fight and try to claw our way out we just end up losing everything and sink farther down.
There is no joy in life anymore... just fear and pain and desperation. Everywhere we turn for help has massive waiting lists and declination letters... we're living on credit cards and family charity now...
But in 2 years... my family will have to suffer a loss of a spouse and a parent, but it'll give them a chance to finally live comfortably for a long time.
2 years gives me hope and is easy to see and plan for... it'll be better
| 1 |
The light at the end of the tunnel, and the lack of will to reach it.
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I'm a 30 year old male living in a very good country (great social systems, generally speaking helpful people), so it isn't an issue of direct circumstance, I want to start with that to be completely transparent with this post.
The problem is I have absolutely no will or desire to get my life together.
I dropped out of high school about halfway through a long time ago, since then several attempts have been made to try and get the education again, but they have pretty much all been massive wastes of my mother's money.
So I don't have an education, I don't have a job, and have had pretty much just the one in my entire life so far like 10 years ago.
My parents have been divorced for slightly longer than that, my father has since then become completely estranged, the only things I know him are things my mother tells him about how he still manages to be a negative influence in her life with certain things he does.
Of course, I still live and leech off my mother, who is an extremely intelligent person, has a good job, but has been forced to take care of her useless son for far too long, there was a long period where she used to get upset, and we would argue, yelling at each other, over me getting a job and getting educated, but since then my mother gotten older, more tired, she doesn't even really have it in her anymore to do that, all our interactions now are calm, but it's not like I don't see the tragedy in that.
She loves me greatly, let there be no confusion about that, and I know she does, she has said many times everything she does is for her children (I also have a sister, who is progressing just fine in life, significantly above average even I would say), but she is getting older, and I've gotten nowhere closer to a position where I would be the one taking care after her, if it wasn't for the way I've lived my life so far, she would have saved up a lot of money by now, and could've retired long ago and done whatever she wanted.
Instead I robbed my mother of a LOT of money, not as in I literally took it from her, but because she had to maintain a house in a different country and spend on a lot of other stuff, she is literally left with barely anything to show for the great work she has done.
I don't drink or do drugs, and have never drank or done any drugs, as far as saving graces go, that's my only one, but it really is the only one, unless you count having a handful of good friends who I have a good relationship with as another saving grace, but all of them are leading family lives now, so it's not like I can really spend a lot of time with them.
Apart from that, there's nothing, I can't imagine getting a job, I have no qualifications for it whatsoever, the only jobs I am theoretically qualified for are the absolute bluest of blue collar jobs, and while I realize that that's the job I should be doing then, I don't want to.
I don't want to be a garbageman, I don't want to work at a supermarket, I don't want to lay brick.
I'm not unintelligent, I'm not particularly intelligent either, at best somewhat above, I've had some good moments in my life, where I've been moderately proud of myself, but even more time I have spent looking at other people and all the amazing things they do, not even just the top of the top, I just mean other above average people, and how much amazing things they create, and realized I will never come anywhere near to them, despite desperate wishing that I would.
I wish I had something I was good at, something I willed myself in getting skilled at, but I lack that will, there's no force pushing me to do something, no inner voice that wants to get things done, I love video games (speak of a big twist surprise that everyone saw coming), and I wanted to do something in that scene, but, I am 30 now, I have no education, no job, my mother is beginning to become more tired by the day, and I don't have any willpower to pick my life up despite being aware of all this.
The fact of the matter is, if I was meant to be working in something "not blue collar", I would've been working toward it by now, that's the progress of every single person's life who is passionate about something, they do SOMETHING towards it, maybe they have some channel reviewing games, or they have worked on making their own small games, maybe they've done small voice acting here and there, maybe this, maybe that, mingled in the community one way or another.
I really have nothing of that, I've played videogames, there were some communities I was part of because I was into the esport, but nothing that you could put on a resume or have someone notice one way or another and go 'oh shit this guy's legit let's work with him.
No, I have literally absolutely nothing, I have contributed nothing relevant to society.
There's no ins for me into the life I supposedly want.
I don't see myself picking up my education, I've already tried literally like several times, and the one thing I have a pretty decent speedrun timing in, is speedrunning to quitting attempts at getting an education, and of course, I've done plenty of lying about it towards my mother, who was really hoping I'd finish it, only to be disappointed over, and over, and over and over again, every time through a big midseason revelation that no, I have not in fact been doing literally ANYTHING at all towards it.
At some point I completely gave up, and stopped lying about any of it, and just straight up said I have no intention of getting an education, I am not capable of getting one, and have no real will of doing a shitty job.
I am not going to go into my childhood, I'll just summarize it with being utterly traumatic and leaving me with a significant amount of core memories, and almost all of them depressing.
The circumstances of my life have succeeded in completely overboiling this potato of a human, there's no consistency to me anymore, just a bunch of mashed human with no discernible structure.
I am left with no will to do anything, no inspiration, no real joys, I have completely and utterly forgotten what it is to love or be loved, despite the fact that my mother has nothing but genuine love for me, I used to have a girlfriend very long ago, but they relationship fell apart for all the right reasons, my ex had made the right choice, it was a painful breakup and one that despite feeling like I got over it, I unfortunately do not believe I truly did, which is just sad because it's a young adolescent relationship I'm still lamenting as a 30 year old 'man'.
I am of course overweight because I don't get out of the house basically at all, apart from sometimes visiting my friends, seeing the movies, stuff like that, but rarely.
My room is an utter sty, several times I have cleaned it up, till it was completely nice and free of any garbage, and every time, despite setting rules and checkpoints for making sure it wouldn't turn into garbage again, it inevitably always deteriorated right back, I remember the last time I completely cleaned it up, I would vocalize to myself every time I'd leave some wrapper, or packing box out or anything at all, telling myself that no no no I absolutely cannot allow myself to let stuff lie around or it'll just go back to what it was, and I kept that up for some period of time, but yeah, still failed.
As far as personal pleasures I partake in, you can pretty much expect what I do sometimes once, sometimes several times a day if I get bored, as to be expected, still thought I'd casually mention it to make sure I don't miss any details.
I bite my nails, I've been biting my nails ever since I was a little kid, my dad made many efforts to stop me from doing it, I have attempted and partially succeeded several times to stop doing it, I've had this whole idea of that even if I fail, I shouldn't see it as failure, but as succeeding to reach a new record for keeping my nails intact, didn't matter, a change in perspective didn't end up meaning much, and I went back to biting my nails, even after a decently long period of success.
I really want to have (at least a little bit more) good friends, but on this aspect I am afraid I am a little bit elitist, I cannot be friends with anyone who isn't at least a little bit more intelligent than I am, it's always been an important aspect in how I choose my friends, if there isn't at least something I consider the other person to be better than me in (that I also enjoy), I become naturally disinterested in maintaining a friendship, it's not like I disrespect the person or think I'm better than them or have some high ground over them, it's just how I end up naturally reacting.
I really would love to meet a person who has a similar kind of mindstate as me with a similar personality, someone who on the one hand isn't completely passionateless about life, who has interests and certain goals they'd wish they could achieve, but on the other hand simply lacks willpower to do it, for whatever reason, and they also have to be a generally loving person, I harbor no ill thought towards anyone ever, being jobless gives a person a lot of time to think and come up with life philosophies, my time spent thinking made me realize a way of looking at the world that completely abolishes any kind of deep rooted dislike I could have for anyone, I simply cannot hate anybody anymore, because the way I look at things it simply doesn't make any logical sense to do so.
If you're catching on you'll realize I am best defined by the label 'determinist' as a result, and instead of having any kind of vices towards people, it is always replaced with the curiosity of understanding what makes any given person one way or the other, and any frustration I could have with someone is usually due to not being able to understand entirely how someone didn't end up as a better kind of person, and a frustration with how much of a disservice someone is doing to themselves by not realizing they could be better.
Anyway, the problem is, there probably are people like that, it's just that they are usually part of more intelligent, more educated circles, and because I don't have an education and don't have a job, I have no chance of meeting a person like that, all my friendships are with people who I met when I was still in school, except like, one friendship that I made online a while ago, although that one gets a little dubious at times but that's another story.
So as a result I cannot make new friends, and it's not like I am upset with the world or depressed because of it, cause it makes sense, I am not explicitly lamenting not being able to make friends - of course I can't, I haven't put myself in a position where that is possible, and I am completely aware of what I'd have to do to get there.
Theoretically yes, I would have to bite the bullet and get a blue collar job, in a year I could probably rent some small apartment and pay for my own education (like I mentioned at the start, the country has great social systems, and my expenditures are pretty low, since I don't smoke, do drugs or drink alcohol, I buy a videogame for what is usually like a couple bucks then play that for like a month, sometimes longer), which would free up my mother to enjoy her life, then after 4 years I could complete the education and do something more interesting than the blue collar job, and start meeting the kind of people I'd like to be my friends.
The reality is that to get there, I cannot be taking shortcuts, I want an understanding kind and intelligent friend now, someone I can share my life with, someone to grow alongside with, but those kind of people aren't naturally attracted to people who haven't gotten their shit in order, it happens in cartoons, in anime and movies, but in real life an intelligent kind person will be surrounded by other intelligent kind people, and won't have any reason to have a no education, jobless hack to even enter their field of vision, and I wanna mention, I've never had any confusion about this, I've always had a very firm grip on the reality of how things work, it's one of the few 'saving graces' I have, a somewhat sober grip on reality, which a lot of people that are close to my kind of situation often appear to not have.
Blaming my childhood won't change anything, blaming the things that inevitably made me the way I am now won't change anything, being a sad sack about it isn't gonna change anything, but unfortunately what also doesn't change, is that I objectively, strictly speaking, despite having ALL this """awareness""", do not feel even the tiniest inkling of will or desire to do anything about it.
And I mean ANYTHING, the furthest limit I have gone to make any change in the recent years is googling a site with jobs on it, scroll on it a little bit, fantasize about how it'd be to apply to some of them, and then soon forget about it, and go back to old habits.
And to finally mention the poor screaming elephant in the room, on the topic of suicide, it's a whole other beast, on one hand I do glamourize the idea in my mind of just not being around anymore, but it will never ever be suicide, as I've mentioned before, I have some amount of awareness, including emotional awareness, of what kind of incredible damage that kind of action would do, and I simply do not have the right to inflict that kind of damage, as much as I wish I lived in a world where it was okay to just be allowed to quit, that's not the world I live in, the world I live in would be left with a traumatized mother and sister, who would forever have to bear the memory of a close family member lost in the most unfortunate of ways, and I have to mention, our family is exceptionally small, I have no uncles, no aunts, no grandparents (anymore), there is nobody in this family except me, my sister, my mother and estranged father.
So yeah, suicide and any other form of it is permanently out of the question, I have of course had the thought circulating in my head that perhaps the damage that would be done by doing it would be smaller than the accumulated damage of me being alive and causing so much discomfort and trouble by being an utter leech, but, and this is one aspect where my "awareness" is not doing me any favors, cause I had to *assume* that that isn't the case, rather than knowing it for certain, but the result is the same and I won't ever consider that 'out' as an option.
The fantasy of someone handing me a button that just permanently erases me from ever having existed that I instantly press without a second thought has been a comforting one to spin around on some sad nights though.
Another thing is that I don't even necessarily feel what would be considered clinically depressed, there's lots of things I enjoy, there's series that I love watching and talking about, especially well written ones, I genuinely love video games as I've mentioned before, I do feel the urge to get out of bed eventually, and can easily control my sleeping schedule when I feel like it, it's not that hard for me to decide to wake up at 7 and go to sleep at 12 or 11, the only reason I sometimes don't feel like playing or watching anything, is because I feel the incredible weight of just being completely and utterly behind in life.
And to once again tie the bow on this, having said all that about still having certain passions and interests, having at least some will to live, despite all that, I have absolutely no will whatsoever to make any kind of change, I am not announcing it as something I'm proud of or anything like that, I simply am stating a fact of exactly how I feel.
If I was going to change, I would've already started, but at this rate, it feels like the only change will occur when something will completely alter the status quo of my life, I mean, my mother won't be able to keep working forever, someday that will end, and it's really sad that I'm mentioning that as the only real scenario I expect I will force myself, or to be entirely specific, be forced to change.
I remember very long ago I posted a sort of similar thread to this on another website, 4chan, one that I've stopped going to a long time ago as well because the vibe didn't work for me anymore, and I remember one of the responses was this classic hardass response that would lay out the reality to me, like a in a very tough love sort of way, which was of course right on all points, but even then it still felt hopeless, I knew that nothing was going to change.
In the end, there's a bell curve of people and the degree to what kind of interesting lives they lead, but just like there is some amount of people who will be at one end, leading great lives, and enjoying themselves immensely, a large amount of people in the middle who are leading just fine lives, and generally having an okay time, someone is bound to be at the beginning of that curve, and lead a miserable life, it is inevitable.
So I can't really be upset with that fate either, it just has to be this way.
Of course I'm writing this out of the comfort of a home I don't pay for, with lots of food every day, not lifting a finger to change my life while there are people out there who work throughout the entire day starting from a very young age to be able to afford a fraction of the comforts I have, often having to support an entire family, but despite having that perspective, and knowing that I am way better off than a lot of people who dream of being in my position, it just isn't doing anything in regards to actually pushing me to do anything, it isn't igniting any sparks, isn't triggering any kind of active response.
Which can only really lead to one conclusion, I simply am an evil, manipulative human being, who is trying their hardest to not admit to themselves they are evil, since when you are aware of every single thing that is happening to you and what needs to be done to make it better, but you actively don't do it, that can only be explained with maliciousness.
Despite everything that I just wrote though, I did actually in many ways come to terms with my situation, which is probably not how a doctored therapist or, you know, any average sane person would describe this, but, I used to have some anxiety about failing slightly more than a decade ago, but then once I actually failed big time, I had to come to terms with it, and then I became really good at coming to terms with failing, and eventually had accepted my fate, I used to envy people who were really good at something, "if only I was that good at literally anything" I'd think to myself, but that's not what my life was meant to be, it only feels unlucky because I'm the one experiencing my life, but I'm just one small entity in a massive sea of other entities, the universe doesn't pick favourites, the universe doesn't care, things just happen, things just are, and I just am this, and they just are that.
Still very sad for my mom though, with everything she has done, everything she's gone through, the changes she made to herself, the circumstances she has escaped, the pureness, kindness and selflessness she has shown all her life, I think she has probably experienced some of the most undeserving consequences ever.
Although I could argue that having a kid in your very early twenties while still studying at a university while being in a relationship that definitely isn't faultless is a very bad move, and I should never have even existed, so in a way I could rationalize the consequences as being something that should be a pretty expected result.
My mother maintains though that I am the most important thing about her life, together with my sister, and nothing else matters, but, I remain adamant that I am truly a mistake, I know she genuinely doesn't feel that way, and I know she never will, but I would never even consider having a kid with a person before having a settled life and confident that I can fully rely on the trust and love from my partner, and trust my own sanity as well while raising my child, while we're at it.
But hey, I said I wasn't going to go into my childhood traumas, there's a LOT to unpack there, but I've already unpacked and repacked it so often myself, I have no will to do that again either, at least not here, and not now.
| 1 |
my husband is trying to leave
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I'm completely broken.. he's mean he goes back and forth. We have twelve years behind us and I have no idea what I will do. I have four children with this man. All so young.. I never go behind him or lie I work and come home I give him what he needs.. I know I can't make him want me.. im lost..
| 3 |
Feeling alone and sad today.
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Don’t have much family other then my wife and 2 kids. I have 1 childhood friend who I rarely talk to.
My thoughts are bringing me down today. Always feel like I’m a big screw up and can’t seem to do anything right or please anyone.
I have no motivation and I just want to sleep.
| 3 |
My sister's hamster died today he lived for about 2 or 3 years and I miss him my older and younger sisters were crying a lot we just buried him an hour ago and he was a great hamster even tho he bites he was so cute and my older sister really loved him now all that's left is an empty cage where
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He used to live its sad that all we have left are pictures I already miss him tho his name was dr Joey bean but now it's just Joey bean it's sad we have remove the phd my sister drew form him off the cage too show he's died in crying while writing this
| 2 |
paranoid my friend doesn’t like me anymore
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yeah
i don’t really know what to do; she’s upset with me about a story post of mine about a situation i was feeling upset & down about, but she thought it was likely me passive aggressively posting about her. :(( i explained that it wasn’t something about her and that i would of course never do that to her or anybody, but i’m not hopeful of getting a response to my explanation, as our texting has been scarce this summer. :((
i’ve been so paranoid that she doesn’t like me based on how little we’ve texted this summer & such and this is making me spiral yet again. i feel so helpless and defeated & it’s to the point where i’m sitting here trying at all costs to resist unhealthy coping mechanisms.. lol :,)
| 1 |
If someone doesn't restrict themselves food wise, but they weigh themselves a lot/do a lot of BMI checks, would you still class that as being an eating disorder?
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Generally eat pretty healthily but because I'm on my period I've noticed that I've been snacking more on soda and candy. Stupidly, earlier I was trying a t shirt on that I hadn't worn for ages, and whilst putting it on my stomach was exposed for a few minutes and now I've convinced myself that I have "too much fat" around my waist(even tho I have been told that I have a normal/slim to average/curvier figure with a slightly smaller waist) just weighed myself and I think I've put on two kilos. Idk how to stop this turning into an obsession
[View Poll](https://www.reddit.com/poll/14ud82u)
| 1 |
I have a huge crush on my online friend and I need some advice
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I first started talking to him on my other Reddit account four months ago. I wanted relationship advice, and he chatted with me about it. I was really hurt over a boy, so I spoke with him about the situation. We’ve kept in touch ever since. Honestly, while I enjoyed his company, I only saw him as an acquaintance at first.
Sometimes, we’d go several days or weeks without talking (I admit that I kind of ghosted him at times). He even had a crush he told me about. Things didn’t work out with his crush after all, but still. I never wanted to like him. I don’t know what he looks like, and he lives half a world away from him. I could totally not be attracted to him. And even if I was, the chemistry might not be there if we met. But today I realized that I like him a lot.
Edit: became of the time difference, he just went to sleep. Before he went to sleep, he told me he enjoyed talking to me🥰
| 6 |
Today is a hard day.
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I was supposed to move across the country in three weeks to join my fiance. She informed me today she's been seeing somebody. Feeling pretty darn low.
| 5 |
How do i challenge The Negative Thought that Everyone has a Better Personality than Me? i Hate this Thought
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Anytime i see basically anyone i feel like they have a better Personality than me, that are cooler and better and funnier.
How do i challenge this thought?
i know everyone has their own unique qualities, everyone has their own struggles and that everyone is different from one another. Yet i still struggle with this.
I tell my self I need to be Happy with who i am, and what Personality i have, and keep working on myself to be the best version of my self.
I think i look for External validation/Attention to prove to my self that im cool/funny/intelligent/witty rather than seeking my own Validation. Its like Harder to believe my own validation than others, Even when others give that Validation its for a brief time..
Last Night my brain was telling me to Download Social media apps to sext or look at porn, i instead meditated for a while and then exercised then watched some funny YouTube videos..
I realized i was thinking like that so i could get others validation/attention rather than depend on my self to be Happy. I was Bored and my brain was looking for the easy way out.
| 1 |
I'll be up all night if anyone needs anything just text me
|
If you need someone tonight or just bord send me a text
| 6 |
At least now I know if people really care about me or not
|
The bad thing is, no one cares
| 1 |
I'm Being Left Behind
|
I've never noticed it as much as I have today. I went to sonic with my sister today, just to hang out together. But A few of her friends were there when we arrived, so my sister just kinda left me to go hang with them. We were all at the same table, but I felt like I was miles away. Just a few days before, my sister had went to have a sleepover with her friends. And a few days before that, the same thing. My parents work and I get left alone alot. I don't mean home alone, although that happens sometimes too. I mean my sister and dog are home, but they just stay in their room and don't come and talk to me. I don't have any friends to hang out with either. A good buddy of mine, I'll call him C, stopped talking to me awhile ago. Same with my cousin, ill call him G. Me and G used to be really close. He moved to Texas though, and we don't talk very much at all anymore. I've been spending my whole summer by myself. My daily routine is get up at 7, workout, eat breakfast, do exercise to help with back pain, play videogames for 3-4 hours even though I'm only supposed to play them for 2. Eat dinner with my dad, go to bed. I'm not supposed to play on the Xbox for more than 2 hours a day, but I like it because I'm both heavily addicted to video games, and also get to talk to people on there. I don't know what to do with myself anymore.
| 2 |
I miss her
|
She left me a couple weeks ago and I can't get her out of my head, I can't forget her. I sleep less and less everyday, i've tried to do different things to help me forget her but nothing work. I'm always thinking about her, what mistakes I did. I don't know how she forgot me that fast while im here rotting in my chamber thinking about her and crying. Since June there isn't been a single day where I didn't cry. I love her but I hate her, I hate the fact that she made me like that but I love what she did for me. I can't forget her, I still love her. I lately got the thought of hurting myself and ending it. I can't live without her, I just wanna feel her love again, I just wanna hear her laugh again, I just wanna hug one last time. I miss and love her a lot.
| 12 |
I can’t do it anymore
|
I hope this stays anonymous but I can’t do life anymore. Everyday is a struggle and my body dysmorphia, mental health struggles, etc has caused me to have crippled depression and anxiety. I recently graduated college and can’t find a job; I’m alone and the only thing I look forward to is the end of the day where I can sleep and push aside my problems. Being an unattractive male in our society is the worst thing anyone can ever image and I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. Self-confidence couldn’t be lower and I actively stay away from photos. I don’t believe in religion because if there was a god, this would be the cruelest punishment ever given. Forgive me if I did wrong in any last life just make the suffering go away. I don’t care how but I can’t continue like this.
| 2 |
I’m done
|
I’m going to do it I don’t care anymore no one loves me I’m 14 and it’s just terrible being alive. Did you know that suicide is the second largest cause of death from kids ages 11 to 19 so what’s just one more 14 year old I’m through
| 1 |
Something is not right and I don't like it
|
It just feels like something horrible could happen at any moment
| 2 |
Im so stressed
|
My parents want to give me away they always say hurtful things to me and they start arguments and act like im the blame I feel useless no body cares about me not even my own family there all i have in the real word im dealing with so many medical problems at only 17 im scared to go out in public i need to go to hospital but i cant go out in public without crying idk what else to do im in pain and physical pain
| 1 |
I am so lonely
|
I don't know what to do anymore people I miss her so much but she hates me she took my virginity she was my first kiss I can't she just at least want to talk to me
| 2 |
Kapagud talaga minsan wala ka nlng masabi kung di oo
|
...
| 1 |
I'm doing it
|
I'm done trying with life, I have no one anymore. So I'm just giving up and ending it. I just wanted someone to know and someone to care. Bye
| 2 |
Still feeling worthless and a loser
|
I don’t know what say but, I really regret of my life. From the day I started my schooling I was a bully. Somehow I managed to survive till 9th standard but it was hard when i was at my 10th standard. I got beaten several times,i was weak and helpless I had no friends cried alone just to feel good, but another day I got my result of periodic exams I was failed,the school refused to give the hall ticket for board exams for their reputation. Then first time I saw my mother crying in front of me and the principal. Shameless me was disappointed as hell. That night I decided it would be the last night i was not able to look her face so I tried to kill myself.
I don’t know how and why I survived. Then I thought the god gave me second chance, so I tried to prove myself cleared my 10th I thought it was a good movement but it was just a distraction,I had to change my school because I was scared of bully. but at the same time it was hard for me tell my parents that I was a bully and a weak scum. so I abused one teacher got suspended again my parents was disappointed of me.
I got an admission thought it was a fresh start I belong from a poor family so it was very hard for me to get a new admission.
The first day I was bullied by the teacher for my appearance I was too skinny at that time.
The second day I got beaten again by the people whom I don’t know. Tried to die again but again it didn’t worked.
I tried to make friends tried to speak to a girl I liked but I was bullied I front of her, the pulled my pants off spanked me. Abused me. They made me stand up in a fucking position I cried again this time in the front of the girl I liked for the first time. That was the movement lost everything my self respect, conscious, i never loved anyone again. Somehow managed to complete my schooling. Didn’t had the money to go to the college, started working and still working for the past two years never had a real friends, never had a girl with whom I can share my feelings and emotions still not able to help my parents. Currently not living with them cause I think I’m a burden. Every time I try to start a convo with any girl no respect is given in return. Had some school friends now they ignore me. Never had any habits of drinking or anything never abused anyone, I am kind to everyfucking people on this planet but I don’t know why they treat me like an insect. Now I am tired of this life. Just got fired today from my 9 to 5 job can’t keep it anymore. I don’t know this time I survive or not……
| 1 |
Sexual Assault?
|
I went out with a guy I met less than a month ago who I found myself attracted. After hanging out only twice I realized that he was not someone I would want to be in a relationship with because of several redflags and I cannot hookup without catching feelings. We had only hung out twice, I was barely getting to know him and at this point I was leaning towards just want wanting to be his friend. However, I did realize that he would flirt with me. We went out for drinks and food and I got really drunk (could still walk and talk) but I was not coherent anymore and felt like my mind disconnected from my body, I lost control of myself. He knew I was very drunk as he pointed it out and I told him. Next thing I know is that he took me to his place and we had sex. I remember some of it but not all and I do remember that I participated in it (I wasn’t just laying there). I did tell him if he could put on a condom but then realized that he didn’t have one on and when I asked he said he took it off because it was too tight, I freaked out. I felt really sad after, especially because I felt like he treated me very disrespectful during and after sex, and I went home crying. I never said no but I also never said yes to sex or to being at his place. I did show discomfort throughout the night and I wouldn’t have had sex with him if I was sober. When I confronted him he said that we were both having fun, but when I lost control over my body I was just following him around. I decided to report it to the police and they just told me that because I never said “no” or “stop” and I wasn’t fully unconscious to the point that I didn’t know what was going on they couldn’t move my case forward. I am having a hard time determining whether I was raped/ sexually assaulted because of what the cops told me. The guy stopped talking to me after confronting him and said I took it too far by reporting him to the police. Was I wrong for reporting him to the police?
| 2 |
[MAJOR TW] here's a rant because i'm having a mini mental breakdown and the only way i know how to express myself is by typing it out.
|
i hate myself. i despise everything about who I am. and im feeling overly stressed and like i'm about to fall back into something that nearly ended my life.
​
okay, so there's a lot. so if you feel like reading some like essay long post about someone who's just too anxious to handle it alone, here you go. enjoy
i hate who i am. i hate that i can't talk to people like a normal person. i hate that i have this crippling fear that everyone ive ever spoken to, including strangers, is gonna judge me, hate me, or hurt me. i hate that i constantly apologize. i hate that i have anger issues and just snap randomly. i hate that everything has to be in its weird little standards that my head makes up that just seem strange to everyone else (i should mention, i have major OCD, like it's really bad. I once color-coded an entire OCD self-help book because it wasnt organized right to me. Back to the subject at hand though). I hate that I don't fit into normal standards, like stupid little things, like finding some random famous actor attractive or something. I hate that I hide anything about myself that might be abnormal. I hate that I can't confront people and I just treat everyone with respect even though they hurt me. I hate my body. I hate it in the way that it's ugly and strange, and that it doesnt feel like i'm in the right one. i hate my face, its too feminine. i hate having boobs, i hate my freckles, stretch marks, scars, cuts, bruises, etc. i hate my appearance, especially so now that my hair is getting longer and my mother refuses to cut it. I hate that I feel sexualized every time anyone I dont trust touches my leg just because my ex fucking groped it. i hate that i hate my body because she used to say how ugly but hot it was and how she wanted to touch me.
​
for context, about 5 years ago, i was suicidal and made an attempt to, yknow.
​
i feel like im falling back down the rabbit hole of wanting to die again and i'm scared. i know i wont, the idea of death scares me away, but the reminders of what i felt like 5 years ago is horrifying. i hate it. i'm faling behinf. i'm slipping under, and this time, my best friend isnt here to save me likfe before. she was who broight me back from the deep end, and i cut her out because she hurt me in a way no one else did; controlled my life to revolve around her and caused a lot of issues now. I dont know what to do. i know i'll bouce back, this happens a lot, but its just hard. i miss my therapist so much. she was the only one to accept me when i came out, she got me through a lot of trauma, and i'm glad she's living her life, but i still miss her.
​
i'm being pressured into finding out what i want to do with my life now and i hate it. i dont want to do what my parents are telling me to. i dont want that for me. they wont listen.
​
i apologize for this, i just need to feel heard. i'll be fine. i know i will. its just hard.
| 1 |
I'm so sad
|
I'm 23yo. I travelled a bit before and (kinda) during covid too. Then I joined an organisation which is eating up basically all my time and money for the past 2,5 years. I had amazing memories with the organisation, but now I feel like I ruined my life with it. I have no big friendgroup, a couple friends here and there, my best friend and me became very distant. I barely travelled, which I loved so dearly and felt myself. Now I'm starting a new part time job, my first serious one, still doing uni, and being the president of the local office in the organisation.
But I still want to travel soooo much, you can't even imagine the burning desire, the "calling" in my chest, the need to get out of the country for a while, which I can't, because I need to spend money on the organisation. I want to party, I want to get drunk, I want to drink in a park before going dancing, and just having some adventures with other people. From outside, my life is almost perfect. Reputable job, reputable title, amazing organisation with amazing people, a loving boyfriend, but I feel like I'm not ready to grow up yet. What should I do? How can I build or join a fun friendgroup? What can I do, when I'm soooo fucking broke I can't even afford new shoes, not to mention going out?? I'm so grateful and sad at the same time about my life. Help me. Someone please help.
| 2 |
Hi, I can't do it anymore
|
Now I have depression, I tried Searching hell in my friend but they made fun of me, last time, years ago, my parents brought me to pray when I said I wanted to die. I really can't. Everyday I hide pain so no one will laugh at it
| 2 |
Painless way to commit suicide?
|
It doesn't get better, it gets worse.
| 5 |
Any alternatives?
|
Well, I know you lot won't give me a way to leave and make it look like and accident but if you have any advises or ideas on how to make it at least tolerable . . . I've tried everything. I'm open to any an all suggestions at this point, provided is something I haven't tried at this point . . . I'm just tired.
| 1 |
how to get rid of this feeling
|
im a highschool student from Turkey
i know its not that important but i had to talk to someone
i had a girlfriend on 14th october 2021 before that we were friends for at least 3 years. after we started dating we were so happy i was helping her she was helping me
after 6 months she broke up with me cuz i was being an idiot i was ghosting her and i was hanging out with my friends.
she was alone all the time and i was making her upset
she was crying on my phone most of the time
after she broke up with me i went depressed and i wast talking to anyone including my family she told me she just needed time to think but i was so in love with her i didnt give her time to think
after a week we argued again and i decided to leave her alone for a week
in that time i met someone and she was making me happy
at the end of the week my ex came back and said she wanted to be together again but i refused
we continued to talk for 6 motnhs but i was being so lame and making fun of her everytime she said how much she loved me
3 months ago i texted her and i told her that i regret everything ive done to her but then
she said she didnt want to talk to me anymore
but i couldnt stop and texted her a week ago that i miss her a lot and wanted to sort things out so we can be atleast friends but she refused and she said she has a boyfriend and cant talk to me while shes in a relationship and i said if anything changes i will always be here then she thanked me
my question is what would u do if i guys were me im waiting for all your reply
| 1 |
Never realized I was so lonely
|
I’ve always thought I had a pretty strong mind because I enjoy doing things alone. But every once in awhile I’ll have a moment where I’m watching a group of people and be like “dang.” I wish I had someone to share my hobbies with.
I think a really good example was when that new game Tears of a Kingdom was coming out. I was so excited for it, I’m a huge Zelda fan. I’ve wrote entire notebooks of theories I have for the franchise and how fantastic the writing and art of the games are.
So of course I preordered all of the collectors stuff and the game at GameStop. I was there at the midnight release with a ginormous group of people. Everyone was talking about the game and walking out of the store just sooo excited.
And I’ve never been so close to the verge of tears in public. I think that moment made me realize how badly I wish to share special moments of things I love with other people.
I could name a lot more times like that but that moment definitely hurt more than most the others.
I really had no idea how good life was when I had a best friend. I miss that so much.
Anyways I don’t think I could ever do online friends but I felt the need to write this down somewhere where people would see it I guess.
| 13 |
Am I a bad person for walking into a pub with my friend not knowing a wedding was going on?
|
Me and my friend walked into a pub because we need the toilet and a drink but when we entered we saw it was a wedding we instantly left but we feel really sad and bad are we bad people?
| 0 |
Never moved away
|
I'm 26 years old and full of regret about never moving out of my parents house when I could have spent my youth in a new city, growing and developing instead of stagnating. I never even went to university. I feel I am too old now to have the youthful adventure, partying and exploration I have been longing for. I feel as though I am at an age where I need to start taking things seriously. I'm so lost and I don't know what to do.
| 1 |
Losing the will to live
|
I’m getting worse and worse every year. I realized that I’m losing the will to live more and more. I’m only 18, I don’t know if I should be feeling like this anymore. I’ve been unhappy for over a decade. I feel so alone, almost everybody I knew don’t support me anymore and it’s really getting to me. I will admit, I have tried to commit suicide in the last 2 years. One of my attempts still haunt me to this day because I know that it would have worked but all that remains now is a permanent scar that no one knows about. I went to school with that agony and hid it pretty well, it would hurt every time I moved my torso but I kept pretending like nothing was wrong, that I haven’t tried to commit suicide the night before. I’m tired of keeping my secrets in. I’m tired. I want to get help but I’m not ready yet and I keep pushing people away. I hate that I’m like this but some of my flaws can’t be fixed. I don’t know what to do anymore. Sleeping was the only thing that I enjoyed but I’m starting to dislike it now. People only care when it’s too late. It’s sad really.
| 6 |
Fuck everyone
|
That’s it
| 6 |
I know Something is wrong with me it's 1:15am and I will be up all night
|
I just need someone to talk to me that will listen or just talk I just need that feeling and people fing hate it
| 3 |
I wasn't good enough for her
|
.
| 7 |
just b alone
|
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8LmvFbIcpxY
| 0 |
Does he like me romantically?
|
My internet friend and I don’t know what the other looks like, but I’ve developed a small crush on him. Ironically, the reason we met was because I wanted guy advice. Here are some things that make it seem like he might like me:
•I was super anxious about going on a trip, and he told me to text him when I landed
•He’s told me about his traumatic childhood
•He told me that he enjoys talking to me
[View Poll](https://www.reddit.com/poll/14t1uf5)
| 0 |
I was in a car crash and i stayed in the hospital for 6 days. hell days.
|
i couldn’t find nowhere else to put this so here i go.
im in my senior year of high school. barely. my brother was in his carseat behind me. my dad driving. we were going to get dinner. my mom didn’t come. thank god. i was finding the pickup order email on my dads phone. we couldn’t find it. i felt my dad swerve to the right as if he was tryna get on the curb. i heard and felt a boom. my stomach, it felt like i got shot. what just happened? the car, my dads new car, the green car he got because he knew my favorite color is green, its totaled, its gone. this happened 6 days ago. im home now. the guy, i don’t know if he was drunk or lost control, he’s at fault. i felt dazed, confused. i look behind me, my brothers ok, he’s whining in confusion, my dad, he’s alive, he’s ok. i almost lost him in 2018 due to a heart attack he had. he’s alive. im trying to get the fuck out the car, im stuck, 10-15 stopped to make sure we were ok. this guy helped me out. my dad had to climb out after me. this nice lady saved my brother. my mom got there. i had to ridr in the ambulance with a confused 4 year old in between my legs. they gave him a lollipop when we got to the hospital. he’s ok. my best friends ok. dad and i had to get surgery.he broke a tendon in his leg. my body doesn’t feel the same. the stitches on my stomach. i barely recognized myself with the tube that was in my stomach coming out my nose, i couldn’t recognize myself. im home. im happy. i get so winded. cars scare me. i had a panic attack from hearing the car tire screech on someones car. my dad’s getting better. im scared. ill be ok. i think. i hope.
| 13 |
My husband drained my bank account today
|
I'm sad and broke. I still love him. On the internet looking for virtual sympathy.
| 3 |
Im gonna be alone all my life, and I’m coming to terms with it
|
I’ve been played with and used by people, but never loved back, and I just realised that I don’t think anyone will ever feel for me what i feel for them, and for some reason I’m fine with that.
I feel like I’m fine being alone, It’s just what it’s come down to, it’s what I am and what I’m worth to others so it’s fine. My friends don’t really care for me like I care for them, and that just put this further into perspective, I’m no main character, I’m the guy walking behind the main group, I’m the guy always asking “what do you mean” and fake laughing in group discussions because I’m not properly included or sought out. I’m gonna be alone and that’s just it, I think I’m just understanding things are what they are.
Thank you if you read, this is just a senseless rant 🙂
| 7 |
I hate thinking about what could have been, but I can't help it
|
Someone in my family recently passed away. We weren't close, the last time I talked to her was almost 20 years ago, but I offered to help my mom with managing the estate. While going through her things, I couldn't help but realize that we would have been great friends as adults. She never lived that far away (about 3 to 3 1/2 hour drive), but I was a young child back then and i haven't had Facebook for years. She was a wonderful woman, may she rest in peace ❤️
| 5 |
Crying
|
Why am I crying? I can’t seem to stop. I shouldn’t be crying because there’s nothing for me to be sad about right?
| 5 |
My parrots died
|
My parrots died,im in a deep mental illness because of that and i dont know ,i had the courage to write this but,a week ago,i woke uo to findy parrots laying on the bottom of their cage breathing heavily.i couldn't make it in time to the vet.now i don't know what to do.i always washed my hands before and after i had any contact with them i always made sure that they had clean air from the air humidifier.the night before the were completely healthy.🥀🥀😭🥺🥺😢 Rest in peace
Eve and Jimmy
| 13 |
Pointless
|
I have realized how pointless it is for me to try to make my "family" happy. I say "family" because as the years go by I know that even though I have been "cared" for I will always be a failure. I try and try, but the places I fail when I try, those moments get highlighted and I am insufficient. I don't want to do it anymore. At this point, I just want to prove them all right. I am nothing, I am insignificant, I don't matter, I don't want to take up any more space. Yeah, maybe I sound dramatic but 27 years of constant fighting to prove to myself and to them that I am a good person, that I have my moments but I am worth this life :(
| 1 |
I tried to commit suicide and failed how do I do it.
|
I tried using carbon monoxide by attaching a hose to my exhaust and funnelling it back through the car. Sat there for 30 minutes and I’m still alive for fuck sake. Help.
| 6 |
Plz be honest, would you say it makes someone weak/a self pitying person if someone gets upset or cries about a self harm injury that they gave themselves?
|
[View Poll](https://www.reddit.com/poll/14sm9lg)
| 1 |
Today is my last day of my job and nobody showed up🤫
|
Today is my last day here and everyone promised to come and only 2 showed up. All the others had excuses on why they couldn’t come. It makes me feel very sad and alone and I don’t know how to deal with it
| 10 |
Everyone hates me
|
I can't take it anymore bro.
| 2 |
my bf made me upset
|
My boyfriend made me upset. I don’t know what to do but let me just get into this. Basically me and my bf kinda got into a argument where he admitted to looking at other girls boobs. I know..not really a big deal but it made me very upset and whenever I told him this he said “I’m more than sure you’ve been looking at other mens dicks.” which, honestly, I haven’t and whenever I told him that he said “Smh. So are you gonna show me your boobs or not?” which made me more upset. I really really don’t know if it is just me being insecure//jealous or what but things like this really bother me. I am so sorry if none of this makes sense. But he also keeps begging to see my breast which every time I have told him no repeatedly but he won’t stop asking. I am also insecure of them (not because anything is “wrong” with them.) But I honestly don’t know what to do. Also, in the beginning of our relationship he had another girls boobs (also mine) as his banner. (we all know each other irl too.) and it kinda made me more insecure because she has wayy bigger boobs. (i am insecure because mine are b cups and not like hers.)Again, I am so so sorry if none of this makes sense.
| 12 |
Depressed
|
Literally that’s all I have to say is in depressed, so drained and feel like I can’t deal with this anymore. I am numb as of recent and it’s concerning. I cant cry anymore and I’m too tired even if I could. I’m just done.
| 1 |
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| 0 |
I need someone to talk to
|
(trigger warning) I 13m am not mentally ok.i have h**t myself more then once it's pretty much a daily thing.i have thought about (it) and thought about doing (it) but I have not yet attempted it, but I'm really close to trying to. I am a complete failure a waste of space I hate myself and no one will talk to me bc I'm a bad person, everyone avoids me as much as possible. I just want to die
| 5 |
Rehomed a stray to a couch surfer
|
Did I make the right decision??
I was told prior that he had roommates and assumed he had a stable place to stay. He already has a 3 legged dog. The dog I was housing for a little bit was extremely depressed because her long term owner dumped her on the side of the road. She had acclimated to our home and was somewhat content, but still whimpered a lot.
I am sad and feel regret that I might have given her to a place she might not be happy with. The guy seemed nice and I know not everyone is going to be in a stable situation, but can still be good people. A sweet homeless guy goes to our church with his service dog. I am hoping I made the right decision. I definitely couldn’t keep her myself due to severe allergies within our family. He seems happy with her and says she played with his three legged dog when he got to his friends house. He sounded very appreciative because his dog hadn’t played in a very long time since his white doggy friend passed away recently. The dog I had given up to him was also white coated.
The new owner has mentioned many times that if we felt uncomfortable with him keeping her, he would give her back no matter what. He has in the past been denied a doggy friend due to people ghosting him over his situation and the way he looks.
I am very sad I didn’t ask enough questions and worry that I made the wrong decision. Despite seeing the other homeless guy from church and his very happy dog.
| 2 |
I thought he liked me but he doesn’t :(
|
He was just bored 😭
| 17 |
I fell deeply in love with a lesbian (as a straight male)
|
So 3/4 years ago I fell in love with her.
I had a crush on her for over a year but then she came out.
It was heartbreaking for me at that time ,
I remember going to bed and crying myself to sleep for over a week.
Well it's 2 years later and I'm still not over it it really hurts to see her with her girlfriend, even tho I'm also very happy for her.
We are still best friends and we talk everyday.
She is super hot and it just hurts being in the same room as her because then I see her and I get even more sad and I have to hold back my tears.
It really sucks but is there anyone that went through the same as me and if yes I would really like to hear your version on this.
So thx xxx
| 16 |
Just found out she was entertaining another guy
|
.
| 5 |
Everyday feels like a bad day
|
I’m just not sure how to stop, I feel like everyday is a “bad day”. I constantly feel like I have a weight on my chest and I’m tired of fighting. I’m ready for this weight to let me sink.
| 7 |
What's keeping you alive?
|
I've had a pretty messed up life and have spent decades thinking about how I just want out. What always kept me hanging on was the thought of the pain it would put my family through. So I quietly suffered and put every ounce of energy into doing the best I could to make something out if this life.. to find an ounce of happiness worth living for.
In the last three years, things have really taken a tail spin and the thought of loved ones left behind isn't strong enough to keep me here anymore.
I can count the number of people I care about on one hand. They're suffering just as much as I am... a few are nearing the end of their lives as it is. If I left today, well, I don't imagine they would be far behind. And the others... i feel like they are one bad day away from the same decision... We're all so close to finally being at peace.
| 2 |
unsure where to go
|
im not sure where to go from here what's the point of life without love.
| 3 |
Just tired of trying...
|
Rant:
Normally I don't rant here but dating is depressing... Trying to date in 2023 is the hardest thing to do. To many expectations these days, I've got over 20 dating apps and none work. I've tried on reddit pages, Facebook, and etc. Can't try in public because of accusations women make to men who try. Especially since I've got nothing going for me in the looks department. People have said things would change if you had a job, but even when I was working women still avoided me... How am I supposed to compete in situations like this?Even for the few I did get to talk to stopped talking to me after finding out that I won't simp or be they're white knight or when they find out about my issues... It's getting way to depressing to keep trying.
| 0 |
Why is it that people with good hearts and good intentions get hurt the most?
|
I am tired of it ..
| 8 |
Well… here we go again
|
I am, umm well.
I am fine, just tired:)
But I don’t think it’s getting better
| 3 |
Please help me
|
Help
| 7 |
Life feels like it’s time to stop.
|
I’m 19, I moved around 8 months ago from my home town in Maryland. I have been battling depression for 2 years but around a year ago I started to dibble dabble in drugs. I’m on opioids right now and I take any xanax I can find due to me always feeling this way. I feel so tired, so miserable, I’m tired of this cycle. I got clean then relapsed, I went to rehab, relapsed. I feel like it’s just time to say my goodbyes. My family hates me because of it, I drag them down. I’m 6’11, I used to play basketball and was actually very good, that’s when things went left. Bad coaches, teammates, recruiting, it all ruined my love for the game and put me in a deep depression and then the drugs as well now make it even worse. I wanna quit again and stop but I hate withdrawing. I feel like at this point it would be best if I just lay at peace, and move on into a different world. My heart hurts so much. I’m crumbling, I feel no hope, at all. I’m in one of the biggest cities and I’m scared to leave my bedroom. I only leave it when the drugs are here or my prescription is ready. Please someone can you give me some advice? I really am at my breaking point and just want peace in my life and I feel the only way to achieve that is to be gone. Not here anymore. I just wanted to share my story, im struggling each day, im a waste of height, my parents hate me, they don’t trust me cause I don’t tell them when I’m using, my life feels in fixable and I know I’m so young which is why this is even harder for me. I don’t see myself staying here for all of this, just wanted to share my story.
| 2 |
Overwhelming melancholy
|
just need to rant and maybe get advice in the process.
Thoughts of wanting to disappear won't stop and im sleeping practically my entire day away. I can't make myself do anything art, playing games, watching shows, exercising are all impossible for me. I burst out in tears while at work and struggle to keep up I feel so lost and lonely. I have an idea of what its caused by but it feels impossible to run from. I feel so much regret over past actions I can't change and on top of that life seems to throw something new at me every single day i'll never get my past back and my present feels like a prison I can't escape from.
For one my car broke down and I can't afford to fix it my glasses broke and I can't afford new ones i'm a month late on rent and completely broke. I'm incredibly lonely no friends never been in a serious relationship and it feels impossible to pursue on account of my severe social anxiety. Someone I wanted to befriend completely ignored me no matter how hard I tried.
I left an old job as a pharmacy tech at Walmart and now I am regretting it im not sure if I can get it back because the boss seemed to hate me and even if I do what will my coworkers think will they think im indecisive or crazy because I left on account of said depression thinking it would go away but it didnt.
I'm annoyed because the reason I left was to escape the person that shunned me and the boss that demeaned me but I was only a couple months out from getting my certification and being able to work somewhere else or transfer locations so why didnt I just stick it out? now im not sure if my time will carry over and if all the months I worked there was wasted. I'm considering moving back to my hometown because I miss family but the town itself is gross and bigoted and I doubt I can afford to move out in the middle of my lease. I feel stuck in life im not in school dropped out a couple years ago because of anxiety im stuck working at Walmart not making enough to function. I'm a failure at art to ugly to start an onlyfans and have no particular skills im so fucking stupid and gross.
My entire highschool years were wasted being something other than me, I'll never get the childhood I want and now my 20s are being destroyed by me not knowing how to live. My mom's dead my dads not in my life and im a burden on all the other family I have.
I can't exercise to get back in shape and I hate my body causing me to hate dating resulting in me being lonely resulting In depression. Which keeps me from excersizing and it sucks. These thoughts won't get out of my head and just needed to get them out I see a therapist but I have a hard time talking about these feelings out loud.
| 2 |
Life is sad
|
I am sad, my life is sad, my parents are sad, we don't have money.
| 4 |
Do you feel like this aswell?
|
Hello, I am a 17, soon to be 18, y.o. male. It is kind of complicated but try to keep up with me. A lot of my friends have girlfriends or they have done the thing and I kind of feel left out. I have that kind of feeling where on one hand I want a nice girlfriend who is going to love me and be by my side for who I am. I want to lose my virginity with that girl and not some random girl or hooker who doesn't like me whatsoever. I want it to be a special moment for the both of us and not just something pleasurable for me and another day at work for her. At the same time, though, I think that I don't want any relationship and I just want to experience how pussy feels like. I think I am kind of ugly to get a good girlfriend, because I am overweight but my parents and friends tell me that it doesn't work like that. They tell me that I am able to get a girlfriend and I just don't try. I don't know what it is. Maybe I just haven't tried hard enough to attract any females. This is something I generally feel. Now that I will become an adult in 16 days and live by myself in 2 months or so, I think about this a lot more. I feel like waiting, getting in a better shape, and in general bettering myself, but at the same time I just can't wait (sorry, I am horny 24/7, testosterone is pumping in my blood haha). Anyway what do you think? Maybe some girl will she this and help me (lol)... I am down bad sorry. Some say men rule the world, but the truth is that pussy rules the world.
TLDR: I am horny, I can't decide between waiting to have sex or doing it when I become an adult.
| 1 |
Please don’t make fun of me I’m pathetic
|
I’m not meant to be loved. I got my heart broken tonight. It was horrible! It was my fault though, that’s the kicker. I caused all of this conflict in my relationship. It was my first real relationship and I had no idea how to maneuver and control my feelings throughout. Now I’m done for. I’ll never speak to her again and I feel like my life is over. Idk how I’ll ever get over it. My entire life revolves around her. It’s sad. I don’t even have a life, I’m noticing. I don’t have much but what I do I’m always willing to give. I’m just too insecure and emotionally immature. I could be the nicest guy on earth in my own head and be such an ass in reality.
| 12 |
Show your loved ones...
|
..how much you love them & hold them a little bit tighter today ❤️
I'd like to preface this by saying that I'm usually a very private person. I'm pretty awkward and don't show emotions often as I was bullied pretty badly as a kid. I have limited social media and hide behind aliases for those platforms that I do frequent. I tend to lurk a lot on these subs and live vicariously through other's stories. I am genuinely happy for those who are doing well in life. I smile hearing people's stories of success, cry and wish I could help those who are struggling/hurting and send virtual hugs, positive vibes and love their way in hopes one day they feel better. It's always been my thought that we should help others, lift them up, hype them, make them feel loved, important and special because *our time here isn't guaranteed.*
In a way, we're kind of like a fked up anonymous family here on Reddit...just don't forget to remind cousin Eddie to 'clean the shitter, it's full'.
There is so much beauty in this mess of life - even in the pain of losing someone close to you. Someone I love dearly gained her wings last Friday, June 30. As she was young, it was unexpected. She loved me more than I deserved and I hope she knew how much I looked up to and love her, too.
Please show/tell those you love how much they mean to you. There may not be a tomorrow.
I'd love to hear your stories whether it be how you showed your appreciation/love or even how you managed to grieve a lost loved one.
Let's be kind to one another. Sending my love to all of you xx
| 12 |
Feeling Sand because i can't learn how to drive
|
This is literally the only thing that i can do, writing on a foreign blog and to anonymous strangers because i fear the judgement of my friends, who all seem to be judgy about the fact that i couldn't get my driving license.
So, about two years ago, i went to my local driving school and i applied there for the theory exam. All went well, nailed it, couldn't even believe it that i was gonna pass it, but i did.
A Month later the exam, i applied to the same place for the practice test, and that's where the problems started.
In the meanwhile i started Uni, and everything there went beautiful. I started doing what i like and i got in the exams the max of grades.
Three months later, in the driving school, they decided me to make me do the test, and the first one was a total failure. In this test i committed a gravious error concerning the ring road, so i failed it right there.
About a month later i tried to do it again, everything seemed to go really well, but the examiner said that i was "too unsure", and didn't make me pass.
About this time, since my driving permit was due to another 12 months or so, I didn't go to the driving school and i decided to take my time to learn how to drive from my mother.
I forgot to mention, but after the second time i was rejected from the examiner, i wanted to change the driving school but my parents said otherwise because of the money i would spend doing so.
So, i go in there again, take my third driving test, and i fail because of a pedestrian that opened the door of her car too quickly for me to notice.
However, i decide not to feel depressed and to try again, and so here i am. In two days i have my driving exam, but i feel like that all my efforts that i have put in place amounted to nothing, because i always repeat sometimes the same errors.
I feel wasted from this, and what bugs me is that i feel that people don't recognise me as who i really am, but a guy who failed three times the driving exam. Going out with friends that all have the driving license is agonizing sometimes because in every moment they could remind me of my failure by asking me how's the driving going, or making a prove of morality because they have the driving license and i don't. And in the past, because of this, another group of friends literally abandoned me (they went on and didn't want to go out with me) because i couldn't get this driving license.
I'm starting also to think that i have some problems that i don't know... And I'm starting to think that i may be just a weight for my parents.
After all, i don't know really what to do, and if i fail this driving test, life is gonna be much worse because in my country i have 4 chances to give the driving test. If i fail this one, then i'm gonna have to give the theory test again...
| 2 |
Does he genuinely like me? Or see me as a possession?
|
As someone with anxiety, I don't date much, and I just want someone who will be loyal to me. It's very clear that he's attracted to me. I'm attracted to him too, but everyone says that I'm way too pretty for him. About two weeks into us knowing each other, he shared a really intimate story of a traumatic experience that happened to him. He’s a empathetic person that cares for other people, but he gets angry over minor things. I'm 95% sure he's gone to therapy, because even though he will explode at the most random times, there'll be other times when he's really good at conflict resolution.
Before we dated, I invited him to my birthday party. Supposedly, a few weeks before, he was flirting with me, but I didn’t pick up on it. So when I invited him, it confused him. He thought I was giving him mixed signals. On his Twitter (that I don’t follow), he was saying stuff like “playing with people’s feelings is bad” and “disloyal people annoy me”. The next several weeks, he gave me the cold shoulder and really did not want to talk to me.
He’ll also roll his eyes or grunt over relatively things that really aren’t a big deal. Sometimes I wonder if the thing that I did even warranted a sigh or eye roll. I’m just wondering, if I got into a relationship with him, would it get worse?
[View Poll](https://www.reddit.com/poll/14rbrlf)
| 0 |
Sad YT Moment D:
|
I've been seeing completely regular comments posted by scam bots on YouTube recently... These are the only memories of their actual channel left after the scammers hacked it.
Pretty sad ):
| 4 |
Trying to Self improve/stop people pleasing and being an Attention junkie. Im overwhelmed with Advice. what do i need to do?
|
What Do i need to do first, what do i work on first?
there is just so much advice that i get overwhelmed.
What do i need to Focus on?
What should i do? keep focusing on self improvement? and find something that i enjoy? which is like low chance with me living in iraq lol.
im meditating, exercising and working thats about it. idk if im on the right path. i ask my self everyday whats most important to me i barely get an answer. im trying to not take life too seriously. since its a journey not a race. but i dont want to waste time either.
I dont Know what i want Yet, There is Self improvement, College, Making Friends, Hobbies, Goals, Dreams, Ambitions, Passions, Meditating, Exercising, Reading, Existential Crises at 21, Thinking about Life, Death, History of Mankind, Creating something for Society, Being Creative and a lot more, i feel like i haven't achieved much. im in College studying Computer science and Learning to be a Mechanic, i want to do more but idk what
i dont have any hobbies outside , but idk where to start and there aren't clubs near me to join or have any friends to ask them
i really dont know what i want to be honest, i dont want a GF, because dating not allowed, have to do it secretly and i dont want that, even if i wantwd a GF i couldn't get one, im either "Super fake Nice Guy" or an "Asshole" mostly im an asshole who makes jokes that are like swords. i cant be witty or funny or charming or anything, i feel like no one likes me, maybe im too harsh on my self and i realize that.
Maybe im overthinking all of this, i honestly don't know, but im feeling motivated to work on my self and not depend anyone for my happiness
recently i deleted my social medias, not texting anyone online, just focusing on my self, and learning my work better. trying to find out my likes and dislikes, who i like or who i dislike, what excites me and whats fun instead of just Porn/Texting forever
i got a lot of Advice, a lot said i need to improve my self esteem, and that my self esteem is low
I know i need to stop basing my self worth on how many friends i have or how many conversations im having, its like im playing with my self esteem by basing it on external things and it will never be enough, How many conversations till am convinced that im worthy? cool? funny? intelligent? I dont know What to base it on either, i know it has to be Internal validation, Give Validation to My self
Some said to work on my People Pleasing habits, but sometimes i dont even realize if im doing them, And ask my self Why Am i doing Them.
Some said Need to work on Confidence/Self Love and be Kinder to my self
Some said that im putting way too much focus on making friends and there is more to life than Just friends or Texting girls online and i know that. i dont know what else to be My Goals.
some said Therapy, but its Near impossible to get it here.
some said to think about my People pleasing habits and why i do them
some said to go Outside more, Get hobbies, try new things, im trying my best to find a hobby.
my hobbies can't be Porn/Texting girls online for the rest of my Life
I enjoy astronomy, sports, movies, shows, video games, star gazing, music, traveling, exercising, meditating, reading, learning a new skill
would like to do a lot more. Planning to buy an a musial instrument
right now im learning some care engineering, also trying to observe my surroundings without judgement, and observe my thoughts without Judgement
some said to work improving in conversations, and be interested in others not just for attention, its like i only talk to others when im bored. Like not Truly interested in others because i don't know how to be interested, Maybe im not interested in my own life maybe its reflects that
Besides that i don't even really know what i should say. or what to talk about
i send "How is it going" online and it goes nowhere
but living in a small town in iraq, its boring here.
just a few weeks ago i found a job in a big city, trying to experience more there
im 21 in college, finished my first year with good grades, met a lot of new people there but i dont think Any are friends of mine. just acquaintances.
but im trying to find other ways to make my self happy that dont depend on External Validation or Basing my self worth on how others react Or how many texts i recieve, i would get Mad after i would send long messages and other would say 1 word, Made me feel like i had nothing to offer or they didnt care about me or like me.
Some said to Meditate and find my weaknesses and strengths but i dont know my Strengths, or How to find them, i know my weakness (People pleasing) but I dont Know how to Fix this Either.
I did a personality test and it said i was a "Architect" and my strengths was (Determined, Independent, Informed, Rational, Original, Curious) and my weaknesses were (Combative, Overly Critical, Dismissive of Emotions, Arrogant, Socially Clueless)
And it said that im hard to befriend, why is that? its really hard for me to make friends, Maybe I'm trying to hard?
its true, sometimes im Arrogant or come off as Arrogant but i admit my mistakes, and Im Overly critical of my self. for example being Mad at my self for not knowing what to talk about or for not having friends and sometimes i get Jealous of Others having friends and being good at conversations i want to be Good at Conversations
But most times im a difficult person to know
And it said that my Strengths are often Misunderstood, But i know i haven't reached my full potential Yet
I been trying to Meditate and observe my thoughts, i picture my self standing and observing the thoughts like im a Statue and not affected by the thoughts, i dont try to engage with them or Observe them
I know its always me chasing others, but i have no idea what to talk about with people
I dont want to chase people but i also dont want to be alone forever.
Most times with people its good when i meet them, then after a little time i run out of things to say. or run out of questions.
Its like Impossible to make friends for me. But i dont want my Goals to be Friends/Porn forever.
i want to do more, a lot more.
im sick of Being a "Fake Nice Guy for Approval" sick of people pleasing, really sick of Porn. been doing it for 10 years. like I want to get rid of addiction. but its hard to find alternatives.
| 1 |
I'm never going to succeed at life
|
I'm too stupid and lazy to succeed at anything I want to do I can't even ride a bike I'm so pathetic
| 4 |
I’m not ready…not yet
|
I’m a failure. I’m okay to admit that. Im an athlete going to college for wrestling. I used to suck but I got really good and eventually went undefeated my senior year, but I feel like I’ve failed. I want to feel like I’ve done something. But I haven’t. I wake up every morning regretting opening my eyes. Im trying to be better and im trying to face my future. But I don’t have anyone on my side. I’ve overcome so many things but does it all matter? All I do is win but no one is cheering. I don’t know if im ready for the future and I don’t know if I want to be alive to see it. But I’ve convinced myself that im a champion and that I won’t quit. But…im just not ready to be that strong or ready enough to deal with these things. I wish I could talk to someone.
| 1 |
my friendship is dead now:( just bc I said I had cancer:(
|
:(
| 18 |
I’m useless
|
My rooms a mess, I can’t even draw, something I felt is the only thing that I’m good at. I barely do any school work all I do is sit around trying but failing. Being shouted at by my dad, feeling like I’m a mistake. Having massive mental breakdowns in my room alone. I’ve tried sh but I can never bring my self to do it. I feel like I haven’t been through enough to feel like this. All this homophobia and transphobia going around makes me feel like I don’t want to live in a world of some much hate. Thank you if you sat around and listened to this 14 year old vent.
| 5 |
Anyone wanting to chat?
|
I've had a couple of rough days.
| 3 |
Whos in the wrong for this?
|
So let's say me and my friend decide to go swimming, upon jumping into the pool, he dives the wrong way and I call him out on this. He says "oh yeah show me how its done the right way" i dive off the pool ladder and i hit my head causing a spine injury, who is in the wrong for this? Who is blamed?
| 1 |
I think my bf is mad at me
|
We've been chitchatting over the phone for a few hours. He got up for a few minutes, came back, and sounded pissed. So I decided to ask him how he was feeling and if everything's alright. He replied flatly and said everything's fine and that he's okay. Then I said, "Okay, I love you." And he replied with an angry "love you." And hung up the phone. He never said bye or anything like he usually does. He's not responding to my texts, but I'm sure he's seen them since I tried calling and it rung once and then went to voice-mail. I don't know what I did. And it doesn't help that I had a dream last night of him breaking up with me and it's been making me paranoid all day. I don't know what to do. I'm crying and breathing is difficult.
| 2 |
PLS help, I'm a guy so idk if I deserve any help
|
I have depression for almost a year, I'm a failure and I'm good at nothing, I have no real friend cuz the only real friend I had is now 300+ km away from me. Probably I ruined lot of lives with my mental illness. I get mad for nothing and I could kill for no reason. I think that this is my life now. I tried improving my self but I couldn't
| 2 |
Pretty sure I got rejected by my friend
|
So I’m a med student and we have to take these big national exams throughout school. Well around the time we were supposed to start studying for them I caught feelings for one of my friends, but I did not want to mess with her studying /prep so I just kept them inside. Well fast forward several months and we passed so I decided I would ask her out, unfortunately we are a decent distance away from each other so I had to do it via text. Well I’m pretty sure she just rejected me, but the message wasn’t completely clear if she’s just straight up not interested in me. My other female friend said I should ask a different way, but she has not responded to that. Either way I’m really sad because I thought we would be good together and now I have gone from stressing about exam results to just being sad. I feel likes it’s been so long since I have been legitimately happy for an extended period of time and this just sucks.
| 13 |
I just can't anymore
|
I don't know what to do in life. I don't know where I'll have to go next year. I fear going outside and going to laud spaces. I hate being alive, but I fear death and don't want to leave people behind.
I can't anymore... I want to give up, but I don't want to burden anyone...
| 2 |
Too late
|
My sister stole our family dog--the dog my kids grew up with and were waiting to reunite with while she temporarily agreed to look after her while we were in an impossible situation. The second she stole her and refused to return her, we have been fighting in court to get her back. We were a month away from the settlement hearing when her lawyer callously sent a one word line to let us know our beautiful Dahlia had died alone in my sister's apartment.
*Alone.*
When she could have been surrounded by her family here as I work from home and my kids are home schooled. She was *never* alone.
*Alone.*
After over 12 years of memories together. A year stolen from us when my sister had declared the dog hers and lied to everyone while we had every bit of evidence you can think of to prove she was lying.
*Alone.*
When we believed in the courts--when we foolishly thought that the truth would bring her back to us. Our little buddy. Our little beauty. So many nights of me thinking of ways to break in and take her back but also telling myself that the evidence and truth would return her to us. Fighting hard this entire year, expressing numerous times that we were fighting so hard because she was nearing the end of her life.
And instead of my evil sister texting us about it (hell, she didn't have to call, that's fine) and letting us know in a heartfelt way, she cowardly sends her lawyer to break us apart in one heartless line.
I didn't know such evil existed.
My beautiful Dahlia, I am so sorry we were too late.
| 2 |
I keep getting yelled at by my parents
|
My parents keep yelling at me all the time and getting mad for the most insignificant things. Only today, we had 6 different discussions and most of them were about stuff that doesn't matter, but what got me real angry and sad was the last one.
It's 1 am and I was playing some videogames with my friends. I was speaking low because my dad has work in the morning, I have nothing to do because I'm on vacation and I'm 20 so I can do whatever I want. So, I was on a game and my mom comes rushing in shouting to me to shut down the PC and go to bed because I was "shouting". I managed to finish the game but still, she told me that I won't be able to play after 10pm.
Again, I'm 20, it's summer and most of my friends can only play at night. What am I supposed to do? Not have fun and just stay on my bed looking at sealing?
This is not the first time this happens and I'm just thinking that they just want me to stop having fun and that they don't want me at all because my sister keeps making a lot of noise too but they don't tell her off for it.
| 1 |
I feel sad
|
Hi all,
Sometimes I feel deeply down since I've lost my purpose, lost my goals and motivation.
Is there anything to do ? Apart from drugs which is a no ? I've tried going into therapy and consulting, but to no avail, and as the burden is too heavy for my fragile state of mind, I often go away on bike, sometimes cutting myself, sometimes just emptying my mind. I have no clue what could be done, or what should.
What is your way of dealing with such burdensome sadness ?
| 1 |
Idk anymore fr
|
Nobody to socialize with, no meds, no games, no friends, no music, no sleep, just me and my suicidal thoughts.
Sometimes I wish I die in my sleep
If I were to end it tho, it’s not like it would matter. We’re all human, we all pass.. eventually.
Don’t wanna live but yet can’t bring myself to die either.
Afraid tomorrow will start without me.
Too many emotions. Not enough words to explain how I feel.
| 14 |
So many stores are going under 😭
|
First Harmons, then Buy Buy Baby, then Bed Bath and Beyond, and today I found out Christmas Tree Shop too!! Does this mean the world is just being run by Walmart and Amazon now (the US at least)? I understand the many benefits of saving money and convenience/ lack of time to make shopping trips, but how nice was it to have places dedicated to these things? These emporiums were great for new parents, new homeowners, and people who just need to buy items for self care. Now I guess you just have to trust whatever generic thing arrives in that cardboard box that you bought for 5 bucks. The world isn't ending, but it just makes me sad :(
| 1 |
Is it just me or does anyone else feel this way about themselves ?
|
Hi! This is my first post on Reddit and I’m pretty nervous ngl. I’ve been feeling down recently and I’ve come to realize a lot about myself. Growing up as a teen my parents never really taught me any real life skills that would actually help me later down the road. I feel like I’m behind everyone else I know, and I wonder why i even exist anymore? I feel so useless like a sack of meat that only knows how to survive each day as it comes and show others love. I have no friends and I close myself off from the world most of the time just laying in my bed scrolling. Since I was 11 i grew to only know how to survive everyday while trying to off myself when I got the chance alone. My parents divorced when I was young and my mother was emotionally nonexistent to me as her child most of the time. She was very emotionally manipulative when it came to me so I ended up moving in with my dad around 8th grade. Ever since I left my mom in my home state everything has gone down hill and I feel like alien in a world I don’t belong in. Idk what to do with my life anymore at 19…why am I even here? I’m just rambling at this point 😅 but if you took the time to read or comment it thank you! 🫶🏽
| 11 |
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