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1,138,306
female
17
indUnk
Gemini
21,June,2004
I can't remember when it was good moments of happiness in bloom maybe I just misunderstood all of the love we left behind watching our flash backs intertwine memories I will never find inspite of whatever you become forget that reckless thing turned on I think our lives have just begun I think our lives have just begun and I'll feel my world crumbling down feel my life crumbling now feel my soul crumbling away falling away falling away with you staying awake to chase a dream tasting the air you're breathing in I hope I won't forgot a thing I wish to hold you close and pray watching our fantasies decay nothing will ever stay the same and all of the love we threw away and all of the hopes we've cherished fade making the same mistakes again making the same mistakes again and I'll feel my world crumbling down feel my life crumbling now feel my soul crumbling away and falling away falling away with you all of the love we left behind watching our flash backs intertwine memories I will never find memories I will never find
1,138,306
female
17
indUnk
Gemini
21,June,2004
there's a part in me you'll never know the only thing I'll never show hopelessly I'll love you endlessly hopelessly I'll give you everything but I won't give you up I won't let you down and I won't leave you falling If the moment ever comes It's plain to see it's trying to speak cherished dreams forever asleep hopelessly I'll love you endlessly hopelessly I'll give you everything but I won't give you up I won't let you down and I won't leave you falling if the moment ever comes hopelessly I'll love you endlessly hopelessly I'll give you everything but I won't give you up I won't let you down and I won't leave you falling but the moment never comes
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
10,August,2004
BAR Now Claim they have the only valid contract... it's getting incredibly interesting this, i wonder when it will end! urlLink BBC SPORT | Motorsport | Formula One | BAR claim Button victory
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
09,August,2004
urlLink Jenson Button's BAR at Farnborough Airshow
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
09,August,2004
Welcome to F1 News, we will bring you the latest stories as soon as we hear word of them, we will also show anything funny we find to do with the world of formula 1!
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
09,August,2004
This article is about the on-going argument between BAR and Williams over Jenson Button urlLink BBC SPORT | Motorsport | Formula One | BAR dig in over Button
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
13,August,2004
And for everyone who might be feeling miserable like me a few days ago... Cheer Up Thanks for Cheering me up!
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
12,August,2004
Today is Firday the 13th, fot those superstitious people out there be very careful I'm not in the slightest though... heres some history on this day urlLink
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
12,August,2004
urlLink Athens 2004 is starting today.... Click here for the latest websites... urlLink
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
12,August,2004
This Website is a must see found it a while ago but decided to tell u all about it today, has all those funny pictures and movies u might want to send o your friends easily available and is always up-to-date! urlLink Lycos cheeky emails
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
11,August,2004
Funny Site this may entertain some of you especially those people ho don't like Rooney(he's great) (that means u Rosie) urlLink Uglyfootballers.com
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
10,August,2004
urlLink Found this photo today of my and my sis at Brighton Pier
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
09,August,2004
Very Exciting Post this but i thought it should be here to remind me of the things i should and should not do! Do not say i am stupid Do not send stupid emails moaning Do not moan Do not insult people behind there backs Do not insult people unless nesscessary Do not mention Rachel(Don't ask) Do not insult people families Be Positive(Unlike the rest of these posts) Do not be a total retard Do not spread rumours Do not insult the person who Rosie fancies Smile
3,873,905
male
13
indUnk
Virgo
09,August,2004
This is my second blog and it's a blog about me! I will say how i feel about things and anything interesting i find i will put on here. Today i was busy packing for my hols which are still over a week away but i got forced into it by my mum. Exciting stuff!(Not). I also dicovered an extremely stupid thing on the net that might make u laugh... wot is the goverment coming 2!!!! urlLink http://news.zdnet.co.uk/0,39020330,39162962,00.htm
4,037,746
female
24
Accounting
Aquarius
29,July,2004
I remember feeling so hopeful after I pushed the 'send' button on the fax machine yesterday .... faxing 7 pages to a Recruitment agency... I had an interview last Friday. I called today to touch base and arranged for them to contact my referees. They have not. My heart sank.... I suppose, I will have to keep my options open.... On a brighter note, I've been talking to my significant other's little brother........ very smart and giggly lil' fella. Just like the brother.. ;-)
4,037,746
female
24
Accounting
Aquarius
27,July,2004
It has been quite a while since I have been seriously looking for a job. I already have a job and perhaps getting a bit too used to the fact (or fiction) that I have been getting mountains of rejection emails and letters because I am not yet a permanent resident. But fret not, the only delay to application --> police clearance is nearly sorted. Hope the long awaited document will finally arrive at the end of this week. That is after 'sitting' happily for 3 months at various public departments of my beloved homeland. Anyway, about the job interview. I felt so confident after the interview (though right now anxiously waiting for the outcome)... a lot of endorphine rush, I recalled feeling tiny beads of sweat falling on my back, as I answered the toughest interview question of all 'What would be the thing that would most annoy you at work'... Woosh, that would be a million dollar question with 4x the answers... make double of that... I mean I like my current job, I like the fact that I am 99% independent now... and gone were the days of 'me broke all the time' when I was a student. But 1 year into the job, I want to be challenged. I want to solve 'complicated' customer tax problems. Make it anything accounting, finance and economics related. I want to dress up in suits, my new shiny Nine West heels, italians scarf and Oroton handbag... yes I want the bling-bling watch... and I want to be independent. I want to be my own person. Blame the system, blame women emancipation.... but yes freedom and independence are to die for.... Just look at history, most wars were fought for various reasons, greed, glory, hegemony... but two most cited reasons were freedom & independence. But yes, the path towards freedom and independence is not one laced with perfumery and roses. Its far from that really..... Its long hours of working, gardening at the rich and famous lawns, rearranging books in old, dusty libraries, stock-taking books dating back to the 60's...... and 50 hours per week of decent accounting work.... I hope I will survive.... I hope that one day, just one day... all these will be worth it... And that I will finally be home.... with my dreams realized.... to the arms of those whom I deeply love ... Yes and that person will be YOU, honey... ;-)
4,037,746
female
24
Accounting
Aquarius
04,August,2004
Where You Are - Jessica Simpson & Nick Lachey There are times I swear I know you're here When I forget about my fears Feeling you my dear Watchin over me And my hope seeks What the future will bring When you wrap me in your wings And take me: [Chorus] Where you are Where you and I will breathe together Once again We'll be dancing in the moonlight Just like we used to do And you'll be smilin back at me Only then will I be free When I can be Where you are And I can see your face Your kiss I still can taste Not a memory erased Oh, I see your star Shining down on me And I'd do anything If I could just Be right there: [CHORUS] Then I will be free So take me where you are Now baby there were times when selfishly I'm wishing that you are here with me So I can wipe the tears away from your eyes And make you see That every night while you are dreamin I'm here to guard you from a far And anytime I feel alone I close my eyes and just be there: Where you are Where you and I can breathe together (and we will breathe together baby) Once again (oh, we'll be dancing in the moonlight) We'll be dancin in the moonlight Just like we used to be And you'll be smilin back at me (only then will I be free) Then I will be free Baby I still believe Oh I've got to believe I will touch you that sweet day That you take me there Where you are I still believe Oh I've got to believe I will touch you that sweet day That you take me there Where you are Oh where you are I 've got to believe I'll always be waiting here That sweet day yeah Only wanna be where you are I still believe.....
4,037,746
female
24
Accounting
Aquarius
02,August,2004
Called the consulate in Canberra this morning... Apparently my police clearance 'has not yet been approved'. Reason being she received it on the the 30/04/04 and she already submitted the whole sack of application on the 28/04/04 (I seriously remember mailing it to her on 19/04/04). Anyway, because of the 2 days delay, my application was sent out on 28/05/04 and to complete the extra 3 months waiting period.... surprise.. surprise, it'll be ready on 28/08/04. So, by the time I receive the A4 paper stating that I'm a good citizen, 4 months would have passed... Now, I feel like jumping off the cliff..... seriously, I dont even have a traffic offence under my name....
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
31,July,2004
urlLink Homily of the Day : ' Marriage is a vocation to sanctity. The primary responsibility of spouses is to sanctify each other, to bring each other closer to God, and, hence, to Heaven. That's why marriage is until death do us part. There is no marriage in Heaven because at death we have achieved the goal for which that love relationship was created: sanctity, Heaven, salvation, eternal bliss. ' How many of us look at marriage in this way? Yet, in the Catholic Church marriage is a Sacrament...here is what the Catechism of the Catholic Church has to say about it. urlLink The grace of the sacrament of Matrimony 1641 'By reason of their state in life and of their order, [Christian spouses] have their own special gifts in the People of God.'[145] This grace proper to the sacrament of Matrimony is intended to perfect the couple's love and to strengthen their indissoluble unity. By this grace they 'help one another to attain holiness in their married life and in welcoming and educating their children.'[146] 1642 Christ is the source of this grace. 'Just as of old God encountered his people with a covenant of love and fidelity, so our Savior, the spouse of the Church, now encounters Christian spouses through the sacrament of Matrimony.'[147] Christ dwells with them, gives them the strength to take up their crosses and so follow him, to rise again after they have fallen, to forgive one another, to bear one another's burdens, to 'be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ,'[148] and to love one another with supernatural, tender, and fruitful love. In the joys of their love and family life he gives them here on earth a foretaste of the wedding feast of the Lamb: How can I ever express the happiness of a marriage joined by the Church, strengthened by an offering, sealed by a blessing, announced by angels, and ratified by the Father? . . . How wonderful the bond between two believers, now one in hope, one in desire, one in discipline, one in the same service! They are both children of one Father and servants of the same Master, undivided in spirit and flesh, truly two in one flesh. Where the flesh is one, one also is the spirit.[149]
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
30,July,2004
urlLink Crosswalk.com - Spiritual Intimacy In Marriage : 'So why do so many couples have so little intimacy 10 or 15 years after their marriage commitment? Very likely, it is the same thing that happened in the Garden of Eden: Their personal sin has created within them a spirit of fear, distrust or guilt, so they protect themselves and withdraw from each other. When a couple recognizes more distance than intimacy in their relationship, they must decide whether to continue the road of separateness or regain the ground that has been lost and conquer new ground. We call this decision 'commitment.' It's an act of the will in which two decide to walk together and then, with the help of God, take the necessary steps to grow toward intimacy -- emotional, intellectual, sexual and spiritual.' That same spirit of isolation that I noted a few days ago, can also happen in marriages. We are all so shocked when he hear couple after couple getting divorced these days...actually the surprising thing is how many are still together...we've all heard that a good marriage takes work and it absolutely does. It is just too darn easy to let things slip and slide...to settle for mediocrity instead of fighting for the real intimate relationship that God intended every marriage to be. I was watching a Christian speaker talking about marriage yesterday and he was saying that it is like a pyramid...the husband and wife are on each bottom corner and God is at the top...as each person slides up the pyramid closer to God...they also become closer to each other. There lies the key to maintaining an intimate marriage, today more then ever we need God in our lives.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
30,July,2004
urlLink Crosswalk.com - devotionals : Key Verse:  'Come aside by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while.' Mark 6:31 (NKJV) 'I arrived home disappointed that I did not receive the fresh encounter my friends and I prayed for. I sadly explained what had happened, described all the places He invited me to join Him, and how beautiful each one was. But the fact remained in my heart that I did not hear from Him. As I shared my disappointment with a friend, the words that came out of her mouth convicted me deeply. 'Sometimes He calls us simply to abide with Him.' We hung up as her words rang in my ears and then I did hear His voice speak to my heart, 'I called you daily to come and enjoy My creation with Me and to just be still and know that I am God. Enjoy Me and all My hands have made' .'     Somehow in the last few days I've lost the joy of it all. Have been wasting too much energy wishing things were different instead of accepting what is and enjoying the moments...and there have been plenty of good ones...they just somehow seem to get lost amongst the other 'junk'.  Yes the washer machine broke down, but they called saying they were sending someone today to fix it instead of in four days like originally proposed. Sarah didn't want to nap according to my time schedule, but she showered me with little kisses as I rocked her in my arms. I had been anxious about the lack of movement in Christian's case, then I got a letter saying that they have a scheduled a permanency hearing from him just short of his first birthday(next month). In the beginning of the week I was feeling isolated and lonely for my family, now I'm making plans for my sisters' visit next week.  Thank You Lord for all the wonderful things that You bring into my life everyday...grant me a peaceful mind today, so that I may appreciate it.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
29,July,2004
This was sent to me by a friend who knows how frustrated I've been the past couple of days with an 11 month old who is teething and a 26 month who is....well...being a two year old. 1. I am teaching you patience. 2. I am teaching you the meaning of unconditional love. 3. I am giving you plenty of stories to tell when I get older. 4. No matter what I do in the future, it wont be as bad as the first 2 years or so. This gives you perspective. 5. When I call you in complete frustration, when I have little ones of my own, you will know with all your heart, what I am going thru. 6. I'd still save these questions for Jesus, when you meet Him. Why teething, was it REALLY necessary??
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
28,July,2004
urlLink Health - Child and Infant Health - Parenting - Stop. Think. Handle With Care. : ' Stop. Think. Handle With Care. Understanding yourself and your child is the key to being an effective parent. Remember always to stop, think and handle your child with care. Parenting young children is enjoyable and fulfilling, but can also lead to frustration , stress and even anger. As a parent, when you experience negative feelings towards your child, you may feel guilty and think you are a 'bad' parent. Remember that all parents have felt similar emotions at some ' I thought this was so important to log...if I at my age (and maturity level?) can get so frustrated that I can't see straight...I hate to think what other moms might be going through that don't have the support and information that I have available.  If you are parenting young children, please read the entire story by clicking the headline.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
28,July,2004
urlLink The National Association for Christian Recovery Daily Meditation NACR 'While we resist the gift of rest, many of us welcome burdens. We find it easier to believe that burdens are the gift God really wants to give us. We will welcome a difficult mission from God, a task, a challenge. We welcome the opportunity to wear ourselves out in ministry. ' While reading this paragraph something clicked for me, but I didn't jump at accepting it...I can certainly see this in some people...but certainly, not me Lord?! We go through certain phases...times when we are called to be productive and then those times when we are called to slow things down a bit...when we don't do it willingly, then life has a way of throwing things in our way to make sure we do.  Cars break down, washer machine breaks down,  children get very clingy and just want to be with mommy all day...(add in your own frustrations here).  It's easy for me to jump to the conclusion that those difficulties are my mission from God and that I must accept them...but wait a minute...what am I actually being asked to accept? Is it to accept my level of frustration and pain in all of this as I continue forth trying to still do everything with those situations at hand...or is it possibly for me to come to a resting place and stop struggling...to slow the pace down a little and just sit and hold my children a little longer...even if there are a zillion things to be done?! 
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
28,July,2004
''We close the memory to all things -- from which distractions and evils arise -- by rendering it silent and mute, and listening to God in silence with the hearing of the spirit, saying with the prophet: Speak Lord, for your servant is listening [1 Sam 3:10].And he will fill them with peace, descending on them, as the prophet says, like a river of peace [Is. 66:12]. In this peace he will remove all the misgivings, suspicions, disturbances, and darknesses that made the soul fear it had gone astray.' (St. John of the Cross, The Ascent of Mount Carmel III:4.5-6, p. 275 of the Collected Works)'
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
27,July,2004
Fr. Pat 'I pray that I may strive for inward peace. I pray that I may not be seriously upset, no matter what happens around me.'   I'm finding that one of the hardest things to deal with is frustration(what mother of young children doesn't know this feeling?). When you want so desperately for one thing to happen and something else happens instead. I'm learning that this is when 'dying to self' becomes so important...giving up my own will is never easy though...and can only be accomplished with God's grace, by offering up those things which are frustrating to me at the moment as prayer. Just focusing on this moment and what God wants me to be doing right now and relinquishing the results to Him.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
27,July,2004
NACR Daily Meditation for Wednesday, Jul 28, 2004 'Rest has the potential of teaching us two essential truths. First, we are not God. God is God. We are creatures. We are limited, finite, dependent. It is a good thing to be a creature with needs. Second, when we rest we may learn in new ways that we are loved. Because we are God's children, God loves us. Not because of what we do, but simply because of who we are, we are loved.' It is so tempting to just keep 'striving'...to keep wanting to 'do' and 'acomplish' in order to prove ourselves to God and others. However, this is not what God asks of us. He wants us to 'rest in Him'...to let our own spirits come to a resting place where He is able to take over. It is only in this place that we can come to full realization that it is no longer  us that lives but Him that lives in us and through us. We become 'Eucharist'... a holy 'Host' in order that He can reach all of those that still don't have Him on the inside, or are too weak at a particular moment to realize it...but this can never happen through our own workings...it is all grace! 'I turn to you, Lord from the heat of the sun and the pressures of the journey of life. I turn to you for shelter and refuge. I want to rest in you today. Be my shelter O Most High. Amen.'
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
27,July,2004
urlLink Devotionals: Moments Together for July 27 - FamilyLife - Strengthening families, marriages and relationships :   'I'll never forget going up on a ski lift with a friend. On our left was a range of 13,000-foot peaks. To our right was a beautiful lake surrounded by a host of mountains on that frosty February morning. I shook my head and said, 'Isn't it amazing to see what God made?' And my friend replied, 'Yeah, and God made this in a day. And 2,000 years ago Christ said He would be preparing a place for us. And He's been gone 2,000 years preparing that place for us. Heaven is going to be a magnificent place!''     I just thought this was such a neat way of looking at heaven and the grandeur that is waiting for us when it is our time to go home.  Ofcourse, heaven has been ready for quite some time now...and has quite a few inhabitants already...LOL...but MY place is still being built...LOL.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
26,July,2004
urlLink http://www.nacronline.com/cgi/dailymed.cgi : 'We do not have to grieve or change alone. We learn early in recovery that we will not get very far if we remain isolated. We also learn early that we need to turn to a power that is greater than ourselves. To recover we need to learn to remain -- or abide or spend time -- in the love Jesus gives us. We are loved by God. And we are loved by other people. It is in these loving relationships that we find joy.' First of all a word about 'recovery'...we are ALL in recovery and in need of healing and change...because we are all sinners and as such we have tendencies towards addictive behaviors of all sorts. The above paragraph reminds me of how Adam and Eve hid when they realized they were naked...we do the same thing our selves...our 'nakedness' however is not just about lack of clothing...but those things that we sense in ourselves that just aren't right. Instead of bringing them to the light...to God and to others...we hide, and isolate ourselves...thereby making the problem worse. 'Sin' festers and grows in darkness, secrecy and isolation. Keeping us in isolation is Satan's greatest weapon against humanity, he  knows that when we come together as 'One Body' we are powerful...we are sharing in Christ's ministry. 'Lord, help me to remain in love. Help me not to distance myself from you or from others. Help me to give up pretending to be self sufficient. Help me to remember that it is in loving and in being loved that I will find healing and joy. Amen'
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
26,July,2004
urlLink http://www.crosswalk.com/faith/devotionals/encouragement/ 'Most of us tend to think of silence as empty and hollow instead of full and rich. We fill our lives, homes and hearts with noise and activity in order to avoid silence at all costs. So much of God is found in the stillness of our heart, soul and body. All of Hell will stand against time spent in solitude because Satan knows the power waiting for us in those tranquil moments, the quiet moments. We must carve out time for solitude and wage battle in order to protect it. The reality is that if we do not come apart, we will come apart. It is time to stop and know Him more.'   I remember one year for Lent, after having given up television and a number of other things that had occupied my time, I sat in prayer bored to tears and asked God what the point was...did He really just want me to live this life of desolation. He gave me the answer...the point of quietness is so that I can hear Him. Boredom just meant that I hadn't gone far enough with Him...I was at a stand still...I needed to go a step further and start obeying Him. My prayer for today: Lord, I recognize my need for time alone with you. I lay down at your feet my schedule, my agenda and anything else in my life that would keep me from that time. Please give me the power to stop and a heart that longs to hear your voice. Application steps: Choose to practice solitude - today. Select a place to spend time in solitude - today. Lay down your agenda. Focus on Him and listen for His voice. Reflection points: Why am I afraid of silence? I think I may at times be afraid of what I might hear...but that is only when I'm being deceived, because God never wants anything else for us then our true heart's desire. What is the greatest obstacle to solitude in my life? I'm tempted to point the finger at my family...but in reality solitude is of my own making...it is possible to have a quiet disposition amongst exterior turmoil...that is being contemplative in an active world. So, in reality my only obstacle is the right attitude. What do I hope to gain from time spent in solitude? A better relationship with Him and in turn a more powerful life. Power Verses: Psalm 37:7 Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him. (NIV) Matthew 11:28 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. (NIV) Hebrews 4:4 And on the seventh day God rested from all his work. (NIV)'
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
26,July,2004
urlLink Teachings: Intercessors of the Lamb Contemplative Formation Community : ' If we are childlike and really want to hear from God and expect to hear from Him, it will happen. It will happen. An abbot once said, 'If life is worth living, it's worth logging.' I always liked that because life to me, and life to each of us, is Jesus. Jesus is worth living. Jesus is the Word of God. Whatever this Life says to me, it is definitely worth logging. It is definitely worth recording and remembering . ' This captured what I'm trying to do here very well and in fact is the confirmation I needed to know that I'm on the right track. I don't want this to be about me or my thoughts and ideas...I want it to be all Him...and THAT is worth logging.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
25,July,2004
(From Terry Modica's Daily Reflections) In today's first reading, God warns us that pride rots our relationship with him. Even if we go to church, even if we pray, even if we have other ways of  clinging closely to the Lord, if we serve any master besides God or refuse to listen to our Savior on any matter, this prideful doing-it-my-way attitude deteriorates our intimacy with him. Our holiness gets buried in the dank darkness where it rots. What are you doing today that might rot your relationship with God? Do the television shows and the reading material you choose work against intimate union with Christ or are they yeast in the dough of your Christian faith? I'm being convicted today of Soap Operas, and some of the boards that I belong to...even though these aren't necessarily 'bad'...they rob me of my time with Him and are doing nothing to add to it...they are merely fluff.  So in today's high tech world ,  'reading' doesn't necessarily have to be books and magazines. I'm going to pray over what to keep and what to weed out. Please keep me in your prayers also.  Do not bring a detestable thing into your house or you, like it, will be set apart for destruction. Utterly abhor and detest it, for it is set apart for destruction. Deuteronomy 7:26  
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
25,July,2004
My prayer for today: Jesus, sometimes I get distracted and turn from you.  How does that happen?  You are the treasure that gives my life meaning and purpose. You fill my every need. I don't want to lose sight of You.  I want to keep my eyes turned toward You forever. Application Steps: Examine your heart for feelings of emptiness, lack of purpose and meaning in life.  Record them in a journal.   Yesterday was one such day...so much so that I couldn't stand it anymore and lashed out at Roy...I guess in the moment of blindness I blamed him. With so many people to care for it is hard to get the care and attention that your own soul craves. Maybe you have been so busy you haven't even realized what is missing in your life. Take time to be still before God.  Pray that He will reveal the areas of your life that are stealing your joy. I need to get back to basics and just be with the Lord, just stop the madness for a little while...have Him comfort me. He is trully all I need. He will then strengthen every other area of my life...I need to start seeking Him first again, and again, and again...however many times it takes to click. Take some time to refocus, identify what is missing and take hold of your walk with Jesus. Quiet time before the Lord is missing. I do get up early each morning to do the Lirurgy of the Hours but it is always in a hurry because the kids might wake up and there are several things that I still need to do. I think I need to take some time when Roy gets home and just go sit before the Blessed Sacrament at Church. Begin anew by telling Jesus you have missed spending time with Him. Commit to daily prayer and Bible study using a journal to record the treasures you find. This is a new day for me Lord...I am now re-committing myself to spending time with You each and every day. Reflection points: Am I convinced that what is missing from my life is a consistent friendship with Jesus? I think I am now...but it is another one of those areas where I need constand reminders. Am I willing to search for a deeper relationship with Him? Absolutely! Am I willing to spend as much time as necessary to find what I have lost (or maybe never had) in order to be satisfied with Him and Him only? Yes...I'm commited to that! Power verses: Jeremiah 29:13 (NCV) You will search for me. And when you search for me with all your heart, you will find me! This gives me such hope! Luke 12:13 (NIV) Watch out!  Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions. It is greed that is strangling the joy out of my life. The constant want of more of the good things. All good things come from God and are gifts from Him...they make life pleasurable...but all we trully need is Him. 1 Timothy 6:20a (MESSAGE) And oh, my dear Timothy, guard the treasure you were given! Guard it with your life. The treasure that I have been given is a relationship with Him...not the individual gifts themselves...I've had it all wrong. Philippians 4:6 (RSV) Have no anxiety about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. I have this passage taped to my computer monitor...it is one of my favorites...I need to soak up this message. John 10:28 (NIV) I give them eternal live, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand.  It is comforting to know that I can neve be snatched out...but it is so scary to think of how often I go willingingly though.
4,022,571
female
40
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I'm wondering if this extra depth in times of crisis doesn't come from the fact that we need to be 'broken', to be completely empty of all that is not of God (detachment is a very painful process), so that then God Himself can fill us. I too have had the most powerful conversions of heart in times of darkness. I believe that He calls us into 'the desert' to speak directly to our hearts. When things are going well, we don't really need Him and may even at times put Him in the back burner. I think that it's like we have this 'God-gage' built into us. As we start running low on God...it starts to 'buzz' and gets louder the lower it gets. We can be pretty stubborn and think that we can 'fix' things on our own and the 'buzz' may be temporarily silenced...but eventually it comes back even louder then before until it brings us to our knees. Another thought on 'suffering' that I had is that it is subjective. What causes me suffering doesn't necessarily make everyone else suffer. God may allow 'unpleasant' situations to happen, but His desire is not that we 'suffer'(He's not out to get us)...He wants His grace to be sufficient for us. Someone mentioned before about the suffering involved with infertility. As most of you know, I am infertile. For a short time while I was trying to 'fix things' myself and kept struggling with what God was allowing in my life...it was incredibly painful. I couldn't look at a baby without getting hysterical. God did not desire this 'suffering' for me, even though He allowed the 'un-desirable' situation of infertility. He knew that if I were to hand it over to Him, He could take the pain away and perhaps even resolve the issue in a pleasant way(even though that's not always the case). I've gone through numerous 'horrible' things (illness, accidents, death of loved ones etc.)where God's grace was so palpable that all I felt was peace and love.   Essy
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I personally don't believe that 'tragedies' or any other kind of suffering are God's will. It's true that He allows it in certain situations and can certainly use them for good(to glorify Him), but it doesn't happen by His design. Suffering first entered the world through sin and I believe that most of it today still has its roots there...whether it is our sin or someone else's. For example all the cancer that we are seeing in the world today, I feel is a result of how we as a society have disobeyed God and have not taken care of our environment(we haven't been good stewards of what He has provided for us)...etc. However I also believe that there are different kinds of suffering. One brought about by sin and the other as we let go of it. Dying to self...the process of detaching our selves from our sinful behavior, addictions, etc. can at first be felt as a form of suffering(the 'desert' experience)...but if we persevere it leads to freedom(this IS God's will). The cross is just one part of the picture, but it's not complete until we witness the resurrection. I guess the way I see the issue of how God allows suffering is like a parent might allow a child to suffer the consequences of his actions so that a  lesson is learned.
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Uniformity with God's Will urlLink by St. Alphonsus de Ligouri 'Perfection is founded entirely on the love of God: 'Charity is the bond of perfection 1 ;' and perfect love of God means the complete union of our will with God's: 'The principal effect of love is so to unite the wills of those who love each other as to make them will the same things 2 .' It follows then, that the more one unites his will with the divine will, the greater will be his love of God. Mortification, meditation, receiving Holy Communion, acts of fraternal charity are all certainly pleasing to God -- but only when they are in accordance with his will. When they do not accord with God's will, he not only finds no pleasure in them, but he even rejects them utterly and punishes them. To illustrate: -- A man has two servants. One works unremittingly all day long -- but according to his own devices; the other, conceivably, works less, but he does do what he is told. This latter of course is going to find favor in the eyes of his master; the other will not. Now, in applying this example, we may ask: Why should we perform actions for God's glory if they are not going to be acceptable to him? God does not want sacrifices, the prophet Samuel told King Saul, but he does want obedience to his will: 'Doth the Lord desire holocausts and victims, and not rather that the voice of the Lord should be obeyed? For obedience is better than sacrifices; and to hearken, rather than to offer the fat of rams. Because it is like the sin of witchcraft to rebel; and like the crime of idolatry to refuse to obey 3 .' Theman who follows his own will independently of God's, is guilty of a kind of idolatry. Instead of adoring God's will, he, in a certain sense, adores his own.' urlLink http://www.ccel.org/a/alphonsus/uniformity/htm/TOC.htm
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Passionate Acceptance Acceptance is so often pictured as a passive, bland thing. But contemplate the beautiful, dramatic, even passionate results of Mary's acceptance. By accepting the angel's message, Mary made herself completely available to God by offering her entire life to Him. When she said that simple 'yes' to God, Christ came to her and to the world. She became the door through which God could touch our hearts in a unique way. She opened herself and transformed the world.
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  Lyrics to Be Not Afraid 1. You shall cross the barren desert, but you shall not die of thirst. You shall wander far in safety though you do not know the way. You shall speak your words in foreign lands and all will understand. You shall see the face of God and live. R. Be not afraid. I go before you always. Come follow me, and I will give you rest. 2. If you pass through raging waters in the sea, you shall not drown. If you walk amid the burning flames, you shall not be harmed. If you stand before the pow'r of hell and death is at your side, know that I am with you through it all. 3. Blessed are your poor, for the kingdom shall be theirs. Blest are you that weep and mourn, for one day you shall laugh. And if wicked men insult and hate you all because of me, blessed, blessed are you
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'Most of our mistakes in this matter of penance are caused by a tendency on our part to tell God what sacrifices He would like best. We give Him these things, and then are surprised to find that He has been asking for altogether different sacrifices. We have not been listening to what He has said; we are so sure that we know what He ought to want. Then He comes to us, ready to take, and we are no longer in the mood to give. If we go on always saying: 'I give you this, I give you that,' we are liable to add the thoughts: ' See what a good person I am.' The emphasis tends to shift from the 'you' to the 'I.' 'I am doing all this for you' --with the implication that I would not be doing so much for anyone else, and that you should feel greatly complimented by my attention. Far better than to say: ' I give you this, I give you that' is to say: 'Take it all.'  Admitting frankly that it is impossible for us to know what this invitation amounts to, at least we can protest our readiness to meet the consequences without complaint. Admitting also that to yield ourselves up to the process of purification that this voluntary oblation supposes is impossible without grace, we can confidently believe that when God takes us at our word, He will supply the strength necessary to support the outcome.'
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'A man is a slave to anything he cannot part with that is less than himself' George MacDonald Back to Virtue p112 Furthermore, we can possess only what is less than ourselves, things, objects. However we are possessed by what is greater than ourselves--God and his attributes, Truth, Goodness, Beauty. This alone can make us happy, can satisfy the restless heart, can fill the infinite, God-shaped hole at the center of our being.
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25,July,2004
Weigh Down p174 The last ten pounds: The Weigh Down approach teaches us that we have to face little deaths to ourselves daily. For example, if we have desire eating and we want to eat before we go to bed, we must run to the opposite end of the house(away from the food), get down on our knees, die to our wishes, and ask God to remove this desire. This form of obedience involves death to self. Death to self, or our will, is the core of obedience. OBE DIE NCE
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  On my Pilgrimage 2000 hand book there is a story about a young college foot ball player at the prime of his life who was stricken with cancer in his leg, and eventually had to amputate...there by ending his life as he knew it. After going through a series of self destructive activities he finally went to see a counselor who gave him a pad of paper and some crayons and had him draw a picture of how he saw his body. He drew a large vase and with a black crayon drew a crack across the middle...proclaiming that this vase would no longer hold water. Later on he started getting involved with youth at different hospitals that had undergone similar circumstances, and he was able to help them and they him. One day he returned to his therapist, and asked if he could finish his drawing. He took a yellow crayon and drew golden lines from the crack to all parts of the vase...'this is where the lights comes through'.
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25,July,2004
This most recent visit to the desert hasn't been totally without value. We need a trip there once in a while to keep us on track, to remind of us of the truths that He has shown us but tend to flee from our minds as soon as things get better and we're back tending to normal life again. One of these truths is that we need nothing and no one else but God...that even includes emotional well being. Things are nice, but they are the frosting on the cake. Jesus has asked us to seek Him first and that all other things shall be added unto us...I forget this often and tend to seek things or experiences. When things go off kilter just a little bit, I get my handy tools out and try to fix it...I should be handing them over to God instead...and then act in obedience to Him. So it is in the order of give-listen-do  not  do - and then beg Him to make your works come out alright. I've questioned Him about unconditional love, and why it seems that whenever I'm disobedient I get called on it right away yet others seem to be able to wallow in their sin without too many apparent consequences. He has reminded me that the Spirit of truth resides in me(I have chosen this myself), and that these things are for my own good. Thank You Lord Jesus, for not allowing me to just sit comfortably in my own mess...I can still choose to just sit there...but I won't be comfortable. So here I go again...Lord I give to you every area of my life, lead me in Your ways and give me Your grace to obey Your will.
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25,July,2004
Hi ladies, I'm often asked how do we re-kindle our faith. Sometimes we start out with such fervor, whether it is with a particular devotion or perhaps an addiction that we are trying to break...like over-eating, or smoking. We know that our main focus should be on God and that everything else will then fall into place, but life and the world sometimes gets in the way and before you know it we are reaching for that extra brownie. I get asked this because of my success with weightloss...people seem to think that it was just so super easy for me...well, let me tell you that dying to your own will is never easy...but it is possible with the grace of God. So here is my best advice...what has worked for me. A weightloss program that I was on used to call it 'pushing the re-start button'...sounds good, but what does that really mean? As a Catholic, it means first of all examining our conscious and seeing if there is any dark area that sin may be lurking. Sin like dust, is only observed if you turn on the light...so don't be afraid. Once you have done that, then ofcourse go to confession...get that dust wiped out. This is the precious jewel that the Catholic church offers that is so neglected by many. We would be willing to pay tons of money to go see a therapist, yet turn all shades of gray when the C word is mentioned. The next thing that I would recommend is setting aside a day of prayer and fasting. Get re-centered on God!  I have a couple of links above that can help you get started. I can't think of a better opportunity to do this then now as we get prepared for Christmas. God bless, Essy
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25,July,2004
When we knock on the door to God's heart seeking help for our inadequacies, the Father gives us the Holy Spirit, who is fully adequate. And that's not all we get! Whenever we pray, we are connected to the Father through the Holy Spirit of Jesus. Therefore, every prayer brings us closer to God and increases our holiness. But holiness does not come quickly nor easily . We must be persistent. No matter what we ask for, including the various things we need and desire for our daily lives, God wants everything to nourish our souls ('give us each day our daily bread'), and this usually doesn't happen fast (we're slow learners). Questions for Personal Reflection: How much do you rely on the Holy Spirit's help in your daily life? I've come to rely on Him for everything...the smallest decisions are made by checking with Him first. How often do you humble yourself before the Lord in prayer each day and ask for an increase of holiness? Hmm...I do pray each day but it has never occured to me to ask for an increase of holiness...I'll add that to my list. Questions for Community Faith Sharing: Describe your prayer life. On some days the only 'formal' praying I get to do is the Liturgy of the Hours at the start of the day and then the rest of the day is an informal conversation with Him about all things. How does it help you become holier in your daily activities? Because I keep checking with Him and know right away if something is out of His will (at least most times)...I may still decide to do it...but I really can't say that I didn't know better. How does the Holy Spirit purify you? By convicting me of all that is not Holy in my life.
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25,July,2004
.=: S C R I P T U R E  F O R  T H E  D A Y :=. 'You show me the path of life. In your presence there is fullness of joy; in your right hand are pleasures forevermore.' ~Psalm 16:11. Praise You God for showing me how true this is...for allowing me to experience this in my own life.   =: M E D I T A T I O N  F O R  T H E D A Y :=. We can hold our lives in trust for God. We can think deeply on what that means. Nothing is too much to expect from such a life. We can begin to see how dedicated a life in trust for God can be. In such a life miracles can happen. When we are faithful, we find that God has many good things in store for us. God can be the Lord of our lives, controller of our days, of our present and our future. We can try to act as God guides and leave all results to God. We need not hold back, but can go all out for God and thebetter life God promises. We can make good our trust.. A 'life in trust for for God' means a life of obedience and faithfulness...walking with Him step by step....allowing Him to lead and guide us into the life that was meant for us. However 'leaving all results to God' is not as easy as it sounds...I want to keep 'checking on Him'...making sure He knows what He's doing? I don't know! I try to give Him every area of my life...I know intellectually that this is best, but still I diddle, daddle and worry. I've learned that the only way to accomplish this is with God's grace...I can't white knuckle my way through this one...it's too much of an effort and too hard on my nerves.   =: P R A Y E R F O R T H E D A Y :=. I pray that I may hold my life in trust for God. I pray that I may nolonger consider my life as all my own . (Fr. Pat)
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07,August,2004
'It is a good thing to grow-up. Not because it is shameful to be a child, but because growth is part of God's plan for us. Being 'tossed back and forth' is an exhausting way to live. We need to find some way to live without being 'blown here and there'. Growing up is hard work. The reason for this, as this text suggests, is that growing up is closely connected with learning to speak the truth. Honesty is a central dynamic of growth and recovery. Increasing our capacity for honesty is not an easy process. But, as we speak the truth in love, we will experience some dramatic changes in our relationships. We will find a more intimate relationship with God - we will 'grow up into Christ'. And we will also find ourselves 'joined and held together' in a community of faith.' As the 'baby' of the family I've always had this sense of being a child and wanting to stay that way(LOL)...even as I approach my 41'st birthday. However, at some point we all need to mature and step up to what God is requesting of us. Maturity doesn't come from 'acting' all grown up, it is an internal process...I'm noticing that I'm becoming alot more accepting of myself and the aging process itself. I don't need to compete with the 20 something supermodels, as long as I follow God's guidelines for my body...eating when hungry, stopping when satisfied, seeking those foods that will trully satisfy me, using my body as God intended in service to others, then I will remain healthy and ageless. It is about seeking and accepting 'Truth'...the truth of who I really am in Christ, the truth of what I was put here to do and be. As this sense of honesty develops within, you can't help but be attracted to others that posess this same quality...and want to be part of a community composed of such people(whether in real life or online). I thank the Lord today for the different communities that He has put in my life and the lovely women that have contributed to making my life what it is today.
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06,August,2004
urlLink Devotionals: Moments Together for August 6 - FamilyLife - Strengthening families, marriages and relationships : ' By being there and making your family a priority, you'll find plenty of opportunities to minister to your children by showing them what's really important in life. I'm learning to take advantage of the 'teachable moments' when my kids are open to spiritual truth.' When speaking to moms of older children, their biggest lament seems to be how their children have drifted from their faith. This is also one my biggest fears...I don't have big plans for my children's lives, all that I want for them is a relationship with the Lord. I know that if they have that and then go forward following His will for them, they will be a sucess no matter what. So...how to develop their faith, keep it strong or bring them back if they have faltered? From my limited view right now as a mom of two young children, I think the goal is for them to establish their own personal relationship instead of us instilling so many 'laws' that they will feel compelled to rebell from. It is about pure Grace! For it to mean anything, the law must be written in their hearts. Therefore prayer is of the essence. I had a mom who never stopped praying for her children(and I'm certain that she is still doing so in heaven) and a dad that has continued with that tradition. Right after prayer, I'd say that a good example is the next top priority...don't just tell them about living a faithful life...show it to them. Use those teacheable moments to advocate for God's word and His Church...ofcourse this means at times having to educate yourself on certain issues that may be beyond your grasp at the moment. Tears of salvation! 'Even in their early failures, the parents are not to be discouraged, remembering that fifteen centuries ago when the heart of a mother was broken for her wanton boy, St. Ambrose said to her: 'Fear not, Monica; the child of so many tears cannot perish.' That vain and wanton boy grew up to be the great and learned St. Augustine, whose Confessions everyone ought to read before he dies.' -Archbishop Fulton Sheen-
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05,August,2004
urlLink Catholic Adult Faith Formation - Good News Ministries : ' What is the source of darkness in your life? Ask Jesus to penetrate it with his light of truth. What is the root cause of your confusion? Ask Jesus to expose it in his light. What evil force is robbing you of the peace Christ gave you? Ask Jesus to shine his holy light upon it. There's no need to be afraid of the truth that becomes visible in the light, because any discomfort you feel is only momentary, lasting only as long as it takes for your eyes to get used to the light. The truth will be much more delightful than you expect. It will set you free! -- free to enjoy the holiness that is already in your soul because you received the Holy Spirit in your baptism.' 'The Light Of Friendship' I've seen the light And it's in you, In everything you are And in everything you do. It's a perfect light That shines for all to see. It radiates from you And has pierced the heart of me. The light is from a friend.It's a light that keeps me warm. It lets me know how loved I am, And keeps me safe from harm. To you my friend I am thankful, In each and every way. For you lift my spirits up, With every passing day. To know that you are there for me, It makes me feel alive. Because it is your friendship's light, Upon which my love thrives. So thank you isn't good enough, They are the only words I know. It is your light of friendship, That gives my world it's glow. Thanks for sharing your light with me. For it is the simple things in life that Are truly unforgettable. --Author Unknown
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05,August,2004
urlLink Devotionals: Moments Together for August 5 - FamilyLife - Strengthening families, marriages and relationships : ' Level one is transparency-being completely open with each other, sharing the real you, from the heart. Of course this level of communication requires a large amount of trust and commitment. When you reach the transparency level, you can begin to know even as you are known.' This seems to be the hunger of my heart, not just with those that God has put in my life...my family, close friends, neighbors, people that I've met through different church groups, and ofcourse my dear online friends...but also in my relationship with Him. I ache to be known and fully accepted just as I am, warts and all and I want to be able to know others so well that I can discount their warts instead of focusing on them...I want to know God so well that His will and mine become one. This involves communication that comes from the heart...no true friendship can survive without it.
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04,August,2004
urlLink Teachings: Intercessors of the Lamb Contemplative Formation Community : ' Intercession is always for others. There is prayer of petition, there is prayer for ourselves, but intercession is always for others. One of the reasons intercession has so much power is because it's not for me. It takes total self-forgetfulness. One priest used to tell people when they came to his House of Intercession years ago was, 'The first thing you need to do is repent: repent of your self-concern and self-love.' Maybe this is why there are so few intercessors. We have to lay ourselves aside and really get into the heart of God and His interests and His concerns .' I absolutely love it when people ask me to pray for them or their loved ones and I am constantly asking others to pray for me, in my opinion it is one of the perks of having a relationship with God...being able to come to Him in behalf of others. I'm not sure how much I actually help, I hardly ever hear back...but it really doesn't matter because I've laid the problem at His feet...so I know without a doubt that He's working it in some way...even if it is un-discernable at the moment...it will have a huge impact at some point. This is also true for the saints that are already with the Lord in heaven...they are powerful intercessors because they are already completely one with Him. Some of my favorites are Mary...who better then the one who is Mother of the Son, Daughter of the Father and Wife to the Holy Spirit! Joseph is a favorite in my family too...as a foster father who could possibly know our plight better? Then St. Anthony, whenever we lose anything...St. Anthony is always eager to help interceed in our behalf. There are others that I love dearly also ofcourse like St. Therese the Little Flower and all the other Carmelite saints whose lives are an inspiration and that includes my own mother...who is last but not least on my list. I know that she is constantly watching out for me and supporting me in my own journey to heaven, where I will be able to join her someday as well as all the others that have been supporting me all this time and will then be able to continue the intercessory work myself.
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04,August,2004
urlLink Crosswalk.com - devotionals : ' Are you worshipping from the depth of your soul in your private time? Is it consistent? Go to a quiet place each day and be quiet before Him. Don't chatter your prayer request, just be still and adore the quietness with Him. He is there - waiting for you. Wait for Him and praise Him. Acknowledge who He is and then talk with Him, emptying your self before him. His power will fill your heart and life. Being empowered is an act of daily surrendering to Him. Each day starts fresh and new, He forgives us when we ask and loves us unconditionally, filling us with Himself. Teach these truths to your children, to your neighbors to your co-workers, to everyone you know, because there are a lot of powerless people walking around. ' We need that heart communication, that transparency in order to fully connect with the Lord. Sometimes we think that we need alot of words or formal prayers to get the job done effectively but that is not always the case. Sometimes we just need to bare our souls to Him and make ourselves available to be filled with His grace.
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04,August,2004
~ TELLING ON YOURSELF ~ You tell on yourself by the friends you seek, By the very manner in which you speak ... By the way you employ your leisure time, By the use you make of the dollar and dime ... You tell on yourself by the things you wear, By the spirit in which you your burdens bear ... By the kind of things that make you laugh, By the records you play on your phonograph ... You tell on yourself by the way you walk, By the things of which you delight to talk ... By the manner in which you bear defeat, By so simple a thing as how you eat ... By the books you choose from the well-filled shelf. In these ways and more, you tell on yourself. So there is not a particle of sense In an effort to keep up a false pretense. Author Unknown Being Transparent 'It is hard to be transparent. No one likes to show a side that would indicate any irresponsibility or failure. No one wants others to know about their embarrassments, or their inconsistencies. Being transparent can prove that we are not who we seem to be, or bear witness to the fact that we aren't as good at something as we thought we were. Sometimes being transparent is just letting others see your vulnerable self. It is letting others see you cry, moan, weep or gnash your teeth. It is letting others in on your heartbreak, your hurt, and your sensitive areas. It is coming off the pedestal and standing down in the midst of the crowd. It is being Jesus, and being hung to die on a cross for all the world to see. author unknown'
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03,August,2004
urlLink Devotionals: Moments Together for August 4 - FamilyLife - Strengthening families, marriages and relationships : 'Reversing 'The Great Cover-Up' and becoming open and dropping your guard with others can be risky. It requires a high level of trust, and the willingness to accept the other person no matter what his or her transparency reveals. But the rewards of transparency make it worth the risk. True intimacy is enjoyed only by those who are willing to be seen as they really are.' When people read my thoughts either here in this journal or in my other sites, the response that I often get is that they feel like they are 'eaves dropping'. I'm quite honored by this, because that means that I'm achieving the kind of openess and transparency that I'm aiming for. We are often so closed off from each other in this world, that it is so hard to get to really know one another...feeling so ashamed of our interior being, we feel like putting on a facade is the only way that we will be acceptable to others. The harm in that is if we only interact with ' perfect people', when we hurt we feel like we are completly alone, like no one else can possibly know what we are going through and therefore we must keep quiet. So it is a viscious cycle, with no one willing to open up and each person living in their own darkness. I had the most amazing experience last night. As we relaxed in the hot tub after a wonderful day together, we started talking...REALLY talking...about all the nitty gritty little details of our childhood...some things had brought us immense pleasure but there were somethings that we shared that we each had been carrying with us for quite some time...in a few cases all that was being brought forth was little more then a dark feeling without exactly knowing where it got its beginning...but as we spoke the darkness lifted...each person contributed view and insights into the situations that alone we could never grasp. It was trully Spirit Filled and an awesome example of what 'transparency' allows us to experience.
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03,August,2004
urlLink Homily of the Day : 'Jer 30:1-2,12-15,18-22 / Mt 14:22-36 There are times when our lives are coming apart at the seams and only the most extreme measures are sufficient to hold things together and get us through. The crisis may be a family matter, a financial issue, or something related to our careers. Whatever the issue, there's no mistaking the sense of desperation and fear, and the willingness to try almost anything. That's what Peter felt as the sea churned about him and he feared for his life. He saw Jesus walking toward him on the water, and with very little thought about consequences he impulsively he stepped out of the boat and walked on water, too. He could have walked all the way to Jesus and safety if he'd stayed focused on Jesus. But he didn't. Instead, he let his mind and heart be filled by the noise of the storm and by all the reasons why he shouldn't and couldn't be doing this. And inevitably, he sank like a rock because he'd acted on impulse with no firm ground beneath it. ' We all fear struggles and crisis...yet it is in those very moments that we are most prepared for an encounter with God. I remember well my own 'breaking point' where the overwhelming pain of all the decaying areas of my life became too much for me to bear and I fell on my knees and begged God to take over...what a relief and peace I felt when I heard His voice calling me out of the boat. It was a relief, because I had been in a sinking ship in the first place...anything was prefferable to it...so there was no time to think about the consequences...like Peter, I impulsively jumped out into His arms. Also like Peter, I often lose focus and start to sink. However, even in those moments God continues to stand by me and wants to bring me back...at times it may be necessary for Him to allow the water to come up over my head in order for me to learn my lesson, but I am confident that He will neve allow me to drown.
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02,August,2004
urlLink Catholic Adult Faith Formation - Good News Ministries : 'What we don't realize is that as God's children, we belong on the waves. Sitting quietly in a boat is for those who don't know God. That boat goes nowhere. But when we get out of the boat and risk doing whatever he tells us, life becomes a great adventure.' 'The Waves' are life itself...in living a life of obedience to God, we will have moments that we are asked to be still and just rest and then there are moments that we are called to duty. We should live both in full trust and knowledge that He is constantly by our side, ready to sweep us up if we fall(as we are bound to)...we need not fear drowning. I experience this great adventure every day...there is no high on earth that can match it!
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Virgo
02,August,2004
urlLink The National Association for Christian Recovery Daily Meditation : ' We need to remind ourselves regularly, therefore, that God's vision for the future is better than our own. God sees possibilities and opportunities that we cannot see. The horizons of God's imagination are not bounded. When we root our hope in God, a totally different future is possible. It is not a future we can control. God's plans may not be the same as our plans. But we can return again and again to God as our source of hope.' I love to make lists and have my life all well organized into little piles on a neat page that I can look at and control. Yesterday this worked well. My sisters are visiting us from Toronto and I wanted to be able to show them a few sights around town and to just be able to have a good time getting the most out of our time together instead of just letting these precious moments just slip by. So, I came up with a list of all the places that would be fun to see and even grouped them together according to proximity...so we could hit a few places on the same day. So, yesterday we got to go to one of the places on my list...Castle Island, we all enjoyed the beach along with the beautiful view of the Boston skyline. So, I can certainly see where plans should have a place in our lives...if we allow God into the plan making. However, we must be willing to let go of those plans at times and just be willing to 'walk on water with Him' if we hear Him calling. An un-expected walk with a family member, a dip in a hot tub, even a Marguerita shared with your sisters can all become little moments to treasure...even if they weren't on 'the list'...or maybe because they weren't.
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indUnk
Virgo
02,August,2004
urlLink Catholic Adult Faith Formation - Good News Ministries : ' Do you know why the Church teaches that artificial birth control is a sin against love? Can you stand up for the reasons why marriages should be sacramental and why annulments are valuable? Are you ready to explain why only men can become priests? Oh my! No wonder we have a hard time standing firm! We understand so little. We are starving in the midst of a banquet. (Many backbone-strengthening answers are provided in the Good News e-Classroom at http://gnm.org/events/e-Classroom/.)' In order to be good witnesses for God and His Church, we need to be educated ourselves. It's funny that those things that Terry mentions above are those same things that I had he hardest time with in my earlier days in the Church...yet those have become some of the things that God has given me a great conviction for. I think if we ask Him to clarify any subject that we are unsure of, He will do just that. So 'education' is not merely about book learning...it is about opening up your mind and heart to all the possibilities.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
01,August,2004
urlLink The National Association for Christian Recovery Daily Meditation : 'Rest can also lead to joy because it restores us. It renews and re-energizes us because it allows us to balance our 'being' with our 'doing'. When we cease doing for a time, our senses are opened again to the world around us. We can see life with new gratitude and awe. And gratitude and awe produce joy.' Sometimes life is like a puzzle...if you just stare at one piece of it, then it makes no sense...but if you put it all together then you can see the full picture. Last week I was being given the command to rest...quite a few things happened in fact to make sure that took place(it really made no sense as they were happening...just produced frustration)...ok so I'm 'rested'...now it is action time...I am re-energized, grateful for all I've been through that brought me to this place and I'm joyful. I have my sisters visiting me this week and I feel well loved and content...may God lead us forward this week and strengthen our faith and love for Him and each other.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
01,August,2004
urlLink Crosswalk.com - devotionals : ' The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few' the Lord says. It's a common misconception to think that we must raise support, fly halfway around the world and sleep in a grass hut on a dirt floor in order to witness to the lost. The harvest is everywhere. It's at the checkout counter in Wal-Mart, standing in line at the grocery or hardware store, in your workplace, on an airplane and around your kitchen table.' I think that I'm starting to get the reputation in my family of being somewhat preachy...surprise, surprise, right? But it is said that out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. My heart is so full of what God has done for me...I just plain can't contain it all...it needs to spill over somehow...and those closest to me get it. My thought is that if God sends someone to me, or puts someone in my path...then He must have a reason for it...I'm often the one that needs to learn something tough, so I do try to listen attentively also...but if sharing my own struggles and how together with God they are being solved helps someone, then that's what I want to do...it's kind of addictive even...give it a try!
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
01,August,2004
urlLink The National Association for Christian Recovery Daily Meditation : 'Salvation is not possible when we are in charge because we are not the Messiah. We cannot save the world. We cannot even save ourselves. When we rest, we are forced to abandon our messianic illusions. When we rest we accept our place as creatures in need of being saved by someone with power greater than our own. When we do this, repentance comes and salvation is possible.' The world (even alot of well meaning Christians) seem to have abandoned the idea of 'sin'...that if we are just 'good enough' then God will take care of us. However, here is the problem...we can NEVER be good enough! God knew this and devised a plan...JESUS! If there is no sin or hell, then what was the point of it all? Why did He have to die on that Cross? I think the reason sin seems to have vanished is because we often can't see our own sins...we are soo busy trying to 'save our selves'...and our lives are engulfed in darkness. Only once the 'Light is turned on' and we see that we do indeed need God can there be true hope. It takes humility to do this...Christianity is not for wimps, it takes real courage to face our deepest fears and weaknesses...but there is so much to be gained.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
01,August,2004
'There were three monks who were working to attain holiness. The first chose to be a peacemaker. The second chose to take care of the sick in hospitals. The third went to live in prayer and solitude within a monastic community. Now in spite of all his labors, the first could not make peace among the quarrels of men. The second who was caring for the sick was disheartened because of the continuous complaining of the sick. So they went to the one living in solitude and in community and told him of their difficulties. After a short silence, the third monk poured some water into a bowl and said to them: 'Look at the water as I pour it down. It is disturbed.' After a while he said, 'Look again and see how your images are clearly reflected in the still water. It is the same for those who live among men; disturbance prevents them from seeing their fault which is the first step in the road to sanctity. But in silence and solitude, one sees clearly his faults enabling him to live the life of repentance.' It is possible to be under such commotion in our lives that we don't even realize what we are holding on to...like a child carrying a security blanket(or maybe some fake pearls?) , it just becomes second nature to have those things with us...we no longer even think about it.
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female
40
indUnk
Virgo
01,August,2004
urlLink Catholic Adult Faith Formation - Good News Ministries : 'We're told in next Sunday's Gospel reading that God is 'pleased' to give us his kingdom, which includes eternal life in heaven as well as the benefits of his love and goodness here on earth. He doesn't withhold anything good from us. And we don't have to earn it! But we do have to avail ourselves of it. Jesus explains how: Examine your heart. If you value earthly treasures, you have nothing that will last, for it's all temporary, so you'd better trade it in for the inexhaustible treasures that come from God. When our 'money bags' are filled with worldly goals or selfish plans or ungodly relationships, there isn't much room for the wondrous gifts of God.' I think it is easy enough for us to see when we are hanging on to 'worldly' things, like money and posessions...but what if what we are being asked to let go of is our own idea of what would make us happy, of those things we feel would bring us peace and fulfillment? The thing that I have to keep reminding myself of is that nothing and no one other then God Himself can do that for me...and my mind and will are so limited by my circumstances...God's is not. He can give us so much more then we had ever hoped for, but we have to be willing to put it all on the line and trust Him. I'm reminded of that story of the little girl with the pearls (I can't seem to get my hands on it right now, but will try to get it and post it here.) Anyway, she thought those fake pearls were IT and didn't want to give up on them, no way, no how...no matter how much her daddy asked her form them...then one day came and her heart was opened to trusting him...and as she handed him her fake pearls, he was handing her real precious gems. We are like that little girl too...so afraid of handing over what He is asking of us, because we are afraid of being left with nothing...but with God that is impossible.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
14,August,2004
urlLink Devotionals: Moments Together for August 14 - FamilyLife - Strengthening families, marriages and relationships : 'As parents, we need to be clear about the character qualities and relationships we are building in our children. Children are a high and holy calling. They are the legacy we leave to the next generation. Neil Postman said, 'Our children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see.' What kind of message are you sending?' I think that most of us moms are very aware of the immense responsibility that we have been given...but do you also realize what a calling it is? I think my long and arduous jouney into parenthood probably made this more apparent to me then it would have normally been. I can see God's hand in it the entire route...from the struggles with infertility where He seemed so far away, to that most precious moment where I held my children for the first time . He was right there all along, helping me to open my heart and preparing me to receive the gift that He had planned for me from the very beginning of time. He walks with me still, because the journey continues...He speaks to my heart about parenting techniques, and brings the right people into my life with exactly what I'm needing at the moment...He didn't just leave me to do the job alone...His grace is constant. So...what I want to pass on to my children is just that...that their lives are a true miracle...they they are so loved by God that He made a plan for them right from the very beginning...they are not a mistake, or not wanted, or somehow less then...and neither am I for not having been the one to give birth to them.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
13,August,2004
urlLink Crosswalk.com - devotionals : 'If I were running the world, I would assemble a team of winners, choosing the smartest, brightest, most experienced, most talented, wealthiest and most successful as members of my team. But there is a God - and, thankfully, I am not Him. He has written a different plan for the most important invasion of all time. It is the plan of invading Satan's territory - Earth - and retaking it under the banner of His son, Jesus Christ. And just look at His choice of recruits for the job - the weak, the poor, the broken and sick, lonely and defeated. God chose the most ordinary people to accomplish the most extraordinary deeds. Why would God choose flawed people to do His most important work? The answer is a very simple and yet profound spiritual principle. God's power shows up best in broken people. ' Actually this all of us...no matter how physically strong, rich, healthy we are...we all have our special areas of weakness and it is in those that God wants to do His work. However in order for Him to be able to use those, we need to have enough humility to acknowledge them in the first place instead of continually covering them up or working hard to do the impossible which is change it ourselves. Once they are given to Him, He will either heal them or give us the grace to live our lives joyfully with it...and then we become vehicles of grace to others who may be struggling with similar weaknesses. Related Links: urlLink Telling-on-yourself urlLink Brokeness urlLink Broken Vase
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
12,August,2004
'Lord Jesus, I confess that I have been ambivalent and distant in my relationship with you. I desire to see you as my Comforter, Protector, Counselor, and Abba, Father. I have held back because of rejection, pain, and hurts I experienced from my earthly family and people in general. My desire now is to have a personal relationship with you. I ask you to come into my heart as the Lord of my life and forgive me for all of my past failings, fears and resentment. Wash me clean. I ask you to be my Saviour as well, that I might rest in you and not try to earn my way but only receive what you have for me by your grace. Thank you that I don't have to be perfect in order to have this personal relationship with you. Thank you that I can come to you just as I am and that you receive me into your loving arms. Amen.'
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
11,August,2004
'The Silence of Mary Holy Mary, Mother of God, You who treasured all things and pondered them carefully in your heart, Teach me that deep interior silence which enfolded you throughout your lifetime. Mary, in your wisdom, teach me that silence, Which enables us to listen to the small still voice of our God Which compels us to worship Him alone in spirit and in truth Which empowers us to acknowledge our nothingness and exault confidently in Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, Which frees us to lose ourselves in unceasing adoration of the God who is infinite love. Holy Mary, Mother of God, Pray for me now and always That I may enter into that silence Which unites us to Jesus Christ, your Son In the mystery of His silence before the Father of Mercies. Amen'
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
11,August,2004
urlLink Devotionals: Moments Together for August 12 - FamilyLife - Strengthening families, marriages and relationships : 'Far too many Christians are being fooled by the enemy. They have been deceived into thinking that run-of-the-mill Christianity is all there is. Jesus Christ may be a part of their lives, but He isn't Lord of their lives.' Only recently has this clicked for me...that it is possible to have Jesus as your Savior without having Him as Lord of your life. Not only is it possible, that's how it was for me for the majority of my life while growing up. It is about a heart conversion...like going from living life in black and white to full living color. I come from a very religious family and always had Jesus in my life...I was baptized as an infant, given all the proper instruction, received the Sacraments and yet it all seemed forced and un-natural. I loved God and was a 'good person'...so that was enough, right? Sadly, a large percentage of Catholics feel this way. However, there is so much more to be had in this life. It unfortunately took some very difficult situations for me to see that I couldn't do it on my own, that I needed God there with me every step of the way holding my hand...no, not as a crutch...but as the way that life was meant to be lived...He is the fuel that keeps us going...so many people are going on fumes as I had been for many years without even realizing it. A personal relationship with Him is the key...and that begins with an intimate heart to heart conversation where we open up to Him and tell Him all and then sit back, listen and then obey His instructions for our life. What a glorious life it can be...I wouldn't have it anyother way. Like the song says...'I have decided to follow Jesus, I have decided to follow Jesus, I have decided to follow Jesus.....no turning back, no turning back!' Link to previous posts: urlLink Being Empowered
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Virgo
11,August,2004
urlLink Devotionals: Moments Together for August 11 - FamilyLife - Strengthening families, marriages and relationships : ' We need to fight for other marriages besides our own. A growing number of Christians, upon hearing of the hurt and anguish of their friends, do not reach for their Bibles, but, instead, hastily offer a parachute and say, 'Bail out!' Or they simply sit by, saying and doing nothing. They just let it happen. Hey, I understand. When there's only a slim thread of hope, what are you going to do?' When I run into any kind of snag in my marriage, whether a small mis-understanding or a huge blow out(it's been known to happen...LOL) I turn to God right away and ask for His guidance in seeing me through it. I'm often tempted to turn to other people and just relay my sorry saga and try to get others to sympathize with me and with how horribly unfair I feel I'm being treated at the moment...BUT...I'm really afraid that the advice that everyone has to dish out these days is how horrible men are and how great our life can be without them...so I refrain from doing so. The advice that I'm really hoping to get though...whether in these types of conflicts or any other area of daily struggle...is enlightenment about endurance, hope and God's grace...the things that will see me through the dark times...so in turn this is the advice that I give out whenver anyone comes to me with an issue...probably not what some want to hear at that moment, but hopefully it is the seed that will blossom later on when they have a moment to reflect.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
10,August,2004
urlLink Crosswalk.com - devotionals : ' My prayer for today: Heavenly Father, I praise you for being capable of handling all of my fears. Forgive me for trying to handle things on my own, and not acknowledging your power to help. Help me to be honest and humble in admitting my fears. Thank you for being my Protector. In Jesus' name, Amen.' As this new day begins I'm already filled with fears. Roy is starting back to work after one whole week off, my guests are gone and it is just me and the kids again(and my dad ofcourse)...the social worker will also be coming by early this morning to pick up Christian for his family visit...I'm afraid! Afraid of not having it all together, of being unable to get done all that I have to do, afraid the kids will act up and she will see what a horrible mother I really am, afraid of letting Christian go...just so many fears for so early in the morning...so the above prayer will be my companion for today. I'm going to trust that God will see me through this day. Please keep us in your prayers.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
09,August,2004
urlLink Crosswalk.com - devotionals : 'However, sometimes envy floats to the surface as I compare myself to women who bounce around full of exuberant energy completing every task set before them. Their endless supply of enthusiasm saps my vitality. I covet their high-energy personalities .' I should probably just start off saying that I'm Portuguese...in my mind, this explains everything. Portuguese women are supposed to be super women...the Proverbs 31 woman has nothing on them...LOL. I however, seemed to have been lacking something from the get go...and was often reminded of it as I was growing up, which made me feel even more alienated and even resentful of these paragons of virtue...which included alot of women in my own family who I love very much. Remember Jesus' friends Martha and Mary...I've always been expected to be a Martha...yet I have the soul of Mary, just want to enjoy the now and I'll eventually get to the 'other stuff'. It's taken many years of soul searching to come to a place where I'm starting to feel comfortable with who I am in the midst of my fellow sisters. It happened when I started to appreciate the unique gifts the Lord has given me and only then could I fully recognize their gift also.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
19,August,2004
urlLink Devotionals%3A Moments Together for August 19 - FamilyLife - Strengthening families%2C marriages and relationships : 'Jesus said that out of the nature of the heart a man speaks! There's nothing like a good thump to reveal the nature of a heart. The true character of a person is seen not in momentary heroic's but in the thump-packed humdrum of day-to-day living.' I've been thinking that if it wasn't for my husband that always seems to be saying something to tick me off lately, or my kids who really try my patience, or the myriad of other things that really 'tempt' me to sin...then you know what...I'd be a pretty holy person...LOL. (Ok...so I'm no where close to perfect holiness yet...I say yet...because that is the destination for all of us and it will happen when we reach heaven...and we do get glimpses of it here on earth.) You can blantantly see where my thinking has been wrong though...but how often do we give in to these types of thoughts that blame everyone but ourselves. We hate suffering...and dislike anything (or anyone) that irritates us even in the slightest. However sanctification is an 'irritating' process. It is only by experiencing these daily 'thumps' that we grow beyond them as we ask God's grace into our lives to be able to persevere. Today I'm going to embrace my 'thumps' and grow from them instead of either placing blame or trying to escape all together.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
18,August,2004
'Where do halos come from? Halos are rings of golden light that we tend to selectively put around holy people and things. We invest the sacred with special importance, we set it aside, and then we believe in it. Graced with our self-imposed halo, we have 'faith' in it, and as a result sometimes miracles flow from it. Since we are always in search of what is special, we tend to bypass the daily marvels of our lives. What if ALL of creation were sacred? Could we paint a halo around the whole earth? ...If we are to 'pray always,' it will be necessary to take up our brushes and gold paint and go about our lives making halos! We should try to see a halo around the stranger at the door, our marriage partner, our children or parents. Try it and see the marvelous and miraculous difference it makes in your life. God has not created a world of walls where the sacred and ordinary are nicely separated. Rather, God has invested the wonder of the divine presence into all of creation. God is indeed among us.' Fr. Edward Hayes, A Pilgrim's Almanac From Heidi : urlLink Heidi's Hideaway This just confirmed the message that I'm getting for today...to live a life of contemplation in the present moment...to just embrace it as it comes...that is true holiness!
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
17,August,2004
(This poem convicted me of not enjoying every single moment with my babies...time goes so fast and I've been either unaware or down right frustrated alot of the time). Bring Me the Babies Bring me all the babies That want to go to sleep, Or those who want to pat-a-cake, Or ones with cheeks so pink. Bring me the crying babies, To sing away with song, To soothe away their cares and fears. (They won't be babies long.) Time slips away and yesterday Is, suddenly, distantly passed. It walks so quiet, by your side. We can't make time last. Babies love the melodies And vibration of our voices. Oh, bring me, quick, the babies Before they have other choices! Bring me the hugging babies That just have learned to give a kiss. The sweet slobbery little kisses I'd never want to miss. A big bear hug would bring me down And I would rock for hours. A lovable, sleepy, baby is Far better than cut flowers. Lord, give me a song for the babies, on earth, That have heard the sounds of war. Let me hold them on my lap And sing 'til the fighting's o'er. Let me quiet their little hearts And send all their fears away, Teach them the Name of Jesus, And, especially, how to pray! © 2004 by Joan Clifton Costner
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
17,August,2004
'There is a rest, a serenity, that comes from God. But it comes from 'alertness' not from 'sleep'. God's peace is not like the 'sleep' in this text. This sleep is denial, it is avoidance, it is distraction, it is pretending, it is death. Being alert means that we allow ourselves to see and hear, to use our senses and mind and heart. It means that we pay attention to what is happening inside of us and around us. The text urges us to be alert, to pay attention. Pay attention, it urges, even if life is painful, even if it is not what we want it to be. Lord, help me to pay attention today! Help me not to put my feelings to sleep. I want to be aware of my thoughts and feelings, Lord. I want to be able to experience both the pain and joy of life today. Help me to pay attention. Amen' I had a new fried E-Mail me yesterday asking me how I was doing with my eating today...I told her that I though I had done ok, but had to admit that most of my over eating takes place without me even being aware of it...so sad! Eating is such a big part of life and should be an enjoyable, purposeful thing...not as a hit and run activity. My goal for today is to live more in 'the present moment'...to fully feel, see, hear, smell and taste what is right in front of me(to lead a trully contemplative life)...instead of constantly trying to escape.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
17,August,2004
urlLink Catholic Adult Faith Formation - Good News Ministries : ' The garbage that others have thrown at us won't fit either. Nor will the emotional bandages that we use for covering the wounds they inflicted upon us. Jesus has already taken all of our blows upon himself. If we're still wounded when we die, its only because we haven't surrendered to HIS methods of healing.' 'Thin Again' by Judy Halliday calls these emotional bandages 'grave clothes'...as in 'Lazarus came out of the tomb with his grave clothes on'. We may be out of the tomb ourselves...we have Jesus Christ in our lives and the power of the resurection...but we may also still have our 'bandages' on. They are meeting a purpose right now...we think they are protecting us from further hurt, but the truth is that they get in the way of true intimacy with others and from being able to obey God's word in our lives...afterall, how well can we walk with Him when we are all bandaged up like that? Another thing that the book mentions that impressed me is how Jesus commanded Lazarus' friends to remove his grave clothes...it wasn't something that he could do on his own. Same with us...we need each other...we need to be in a loving community where we can experience God's hraling love in a concrete way.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
16,August,2004
urlLink Crosswalk.com - devotionals : ' Jesus wants us to come to Him with total abandon. In Matthew 22:37 Jesus said,'Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.' In this verse,'heart' literally means 'thought and emotion', and all your 'soul' literally means 'life or whole person' and 'mind' literally means 'understanding'. In other words, we must lay down everything! Every thought - every emotion - every bit of knowledge - our past, present and future. ' There is a song by Clay Cross that I love and was very meaningful to me when I first started walking with the Lord...it is called ' I Surrender All'. This was something that I needed to be reminded of again...as I sit here struggling so hard to 'keep it all together'...thank You Lord for reminding me that true peace and joy comes not from 'keeping it' but from 'surrendering it'... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I have wrestled in the darkness of this lonely pilgrim land Raising strong and mighty fortresses that I alone command But these castles I've constructed by the strength of my own hand Are just temporary kingdoms on foundations made of sand In the middle of the battle I beleive I've finally found I'll never know the thrill of victory 'til I'm willing to lay down All my weapons of defense and earthly strategies of war So I'm laying down my arms and running helplessly to Yours Chorus:I surrender all my silent hopes and dreams Though the price to follow costs me everything I surrender all my human soul desires If sacrafice requires That all my kingdoms fall I surrender all If the source of my ambition is the treasure I obtain If I measure my successes on a scale of earthly gain If the focus of my vision is the status I attain My accomplishments are worthless and my efforts are in vain So I lay aside these trophies to pursue a higher crown And should You choose somehow to use the life I willingly laydown I surrender all the triumph for it's only by Your grace I relinquish all the glory, I surrender all the praise Bridge:Everything I am, all I've done, and all I've known Now belongs to You, the life I live is not my own Just as Abraham laid Isaac on the sacraficial fire If all I have is all that You desire I surrender all
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
16,August,2004
Ok...so how do we know if you are living a 'life of grace'...or if grace is missing in a particular area of our lives? A life of grace should exhibit charity, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, generosity, gentleness, faithfulness, modesty, self-control, and chastity (Galatians 5:22-23; C1832). If there is a particular area where these 'fruits' are not being reflected...then we know those are the areas we need to 'submit to God'. The Church teaches us that there are two types of grace... Sanctifying Grace ; God' life and love making us His sons and daughters that came to us at Baptism and Actual Grace ; Which gives us the ongoing help we need to keep on the right path. How do we get access to these graces? First of all they are a free gift from God, so they cannot be 'earned'...it's not about being 'good enough'...His grace is available to all those who seek Him with their whole heart. However, He has left the Church through the successors of Peter and his ministers the capability to administer some visible signs...these are called Sacraments! They are signs from Christ Himself by which He comes to us and gives us His life and love. There are three groups... the sacraments of initiation -- baptism, confirmation, and Eucharist ; the Sacraments of healing --- pennance and anointing of the sick ; the sacraments at the service of communin and the mission of the faithful -- holy orders and matrimony . There are also those things called Sacramentals , they open us up to God's grace if we use them with faith, just as prayer can open our hearts to God. Sacramentals dispose us to receive the grace of the sacraments and sanctify various occasions of human life. Most sacramentals are related to the sacraments in some way. Holy water, for example, is blessed water that recalls our baptism. All sacramentals remind us of the goodness of the things God has created. Important sacramentals are prayers of blessing, blessed ashes, bells, candles, crosses, crucifixes, statues, sacred images, medals, oils, palms and rosaries.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
15,August,2004
urlLink Homily of the Day : 'There's something in every one of us that inclines us to give our hearts to what's in front of us, no matter how trivial or inconsequential it may be. And having given our hearts, we have little room for anything else, not even an invitation from the Lord. ' This is a constant life time struggle...as most of us that struggle with some type of addiction knows. I've pushed my re-start button this weekend as far as my struggles with food goes...I no longer have room in my heart for meaningless things...my heart is for Love(God) alone. How do we know if we've given our heart to something? It's alot like a romantic relationship with a new boyfriend (do you remember that far back? LOL)...you think about it all the time, you can't wait to spend time with it, your entire focus is on it all the time, you feel bad when you are seperated. I've heard it said that where attention goes, energy(grace?) flows...so I need to start putting my attention into the right things...those that will give me a life that is filled with grace, instead of the things that block it.
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
15,August,2004
As far as bringing my eating into obedience with God's will...I feel He's calling me back to a group I helped put together a while back(link below). Sue has been doing such a wonderful job holding it together and supporting everyone on their particular journies...I'm sure she won't mind if I put a plug in for the group here. urlLink http://p213.ezboard.com/brecoveryrebellion
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
15,August,2004
1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing, that we would manage our lives perfectly, and those of anyone else who would allow us to. 2. Came to believe there was no power greater than ourselves and that the rest of the world was insane. 3. Made a decision to have our loved ones and friends turn their will and their lives over to our care, even thought they couldn't understand us. 4. Made a searching moral and immoral inventory of everyone we knew. 5. Admitted to the whole world the exact nature of everyone else's wrongs. 6.Were entirely ready to make others straighten up and do right. 7. Demanded others to either shape up or ship out. 8. Made a list of all persons who had harmed us and became willing to go to any length to get even with them all. 9.Got direct revenge on such people whenever possible, except when to do so would cost us our lives, or at the very least, a jail sentence. 10. Continued to take the inventory of others, and when they were wrong promptly and repeatedly told them about it. 11. Sought through complaining and nagging to improve our relations with others as we couldn't understand them, asking only that they knuckle under and do it our way. 12. Having had a complete physical, emotional and spiritual breakdown as a result of these steps, we tried to blame it on others and to get sympathy and pity in all our affairs. Author unknown
4,022,571
female
40
indUnk
Virgo
15,August,2004
urlLink The National Association for Christian Recovery Daily Meditation : Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. -Philippians 4:6 ' Responding to this invitation requires a great deal of us. It requires that we acknowledge that we cannot do what we have been trying to do. We are powerless. It requires that we turn to God. It requires that we release our control, our anxiety, our very lives into God's care.' Just this morning after finishing my morning prayers and God putting in my heart a few things that I had been 'holding on to' and releasing those things to him, I read this and it just jumped out at me...YES LORD...I get the message now...LOL. You would think that I would fully get it by now...I've been down this same road so many times...I thought I had this particular lesson well under my belt...but it just goes to show that we should never get to cocky...Satan walks around like a lion seeking to destroy...and the worst part is that I've been in agreement with him in some areas and not with my Lord and Savior. Lord I can't...maintain my weight, stay healthy, have a good relationship with my husband, keep my house in order, be loving and giving...without You! On my own, I am trully powerless...I just get frustrated and more negativity sets in, carrying me even further into shame and self hatred. I now turn to You! Which means that I must turn away from all that is not of You or not Your will for me in these areas...help me to do that Lord. I know that slowly walking with You in obedience, in little baby steps...I CAN do it...You have showed me this before, and have brought great blessings into my life through it. I thank You for that Lord...it has bestowed the hope that I need to keep on this road. I now release my control, anxiety, and my very life into Your care! Jesus I Trust In You!
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
19,July,2004
urlLink And here is Menchi all dry and slightly fluffy! He was quite content and purring away when this snap was taken. Don't you just love those blue eyes!  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
19,July,2004
urlLink Poor little guy. Menchi is simply not wanting to move. I couldn't resist and had to take a photo of his Yoda impression. Immediately after he received a warm cuddle from me. ^_^  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
19,July,2004
urlLink Well, this is after his second bath. Not too pleased, but at least he's warm.  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
19,July,2004
urlLink Just two days later and Menchi has decided that the laundry basket was the place to be. I found him in there while loading the washing machine. Hearing a squeak of a playful meow, I stopped what I was doing and saw him playing peek-a-boo with me.  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
19,July,2004
urlLink My fiancee wanted another cat in the home. We already had two! I was adamant that there wasn't going to be a third. But reluctantly, I agreed to go see the litter with him, and then reluctantly agreed to have Menchi in our home on the condition that my fiancee was the one to prepare for his arrival.   Folks, you can obviously see where this is leading can't you? I was the one who kitten proofed the house. There is a BIG difference between cat proof and kitten proof. Much of the groundwork had been done thank lord. Then there was a thorough clean of the house and then finally buying of another litter tray, kitten food, bedding etc. And yes, I did let my fiancee know that he was not my favourite person as I had spent my weekend preparing for the kitten he wanted.   When we brought Menchi home and introduced him to Russell and Esper, it was obvious that this kitten was special. It was the fastest cat introduction on record. Russell sniffed and proceeded to lick Menchi. Esper had her nose put out of joint but 12 hours later was willing to tolerate his presence as she did us humans.   The photo is of Menchi the first night he entered his forever home. And for some reason he insisted on curling up to me, obviously he knew how to get into my heart and stay there.   urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
29,June,2004
urlLink I thought I would try out the Sepia setting on my wonderful Sony digital camera. I think it worked pretty well. Don't you?  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
21,June,2004
urlLink He sure doesn't look pleased about a camera being pointed his way. But the fact is, he is the easiest out of my three cats to photograph. Well, more like the easiest to convince.  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
21,June,2004
urlLink   urlLink Russell was my 21st birthday present from my future in-laws. He's the first pet I've ever had. He isn't just a pet cat. He is a companion. If you've ever had a pet of any sort, you can understand this bond. I do not have the ability to give this bond the justice it deserves. Perhaps some details of the first week that I had Russell in my care can help. When I picked Russell from the litter of which only two kittens remained, he was tiny. In fact, the owners thought he was female and the runt of the litter. When Russell curled up, he fit onto a 20cm x 20cm handtowel as if it was a mat. The first 24 hours was a steep learning curve for me. I thought I knew quite a bit about looking after a kitten. Boy, was I wrong. If it were not for Ronie and Peter, I would have been lost. Russell was from a farm and had no concept of kitty litter. He had to do his business outdoors. This flew in the face of me wanting him to be an indoor cat. It took a week of using dirt in the litter tray and slowly adding kitty litter to teach him that it was okay to use a tray. At least he understood the concept. The first vet visit was an eye opener. Russell was a boy. I had named him Snowball after The Simpsons family cat but that changed. That and he was full of fleas. I had already known that as Ronie had shown me how to comb them out of his fur and how to kill them. His belly was full of worms. And in two weeks, Russell DOUBLED his weight much to my relief and was declared flea free and in a month, worm free. And now, Russell is a happy healthy 4 kg indoor cat.
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink I love Russell's lemon yellow eyes that look out at the world with curiosity and intelligence. This is one of Russell's most common poses. In this particular photo, you can see his white patch on his chest.  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink Close up and Personal  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink 'You've got your photo. What more do you want?'  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink 'Am I just not the cutest?'  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink Russell: 'What do you mean this isn't my bed?'  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink Russell: 'Anything for a treat! Don't I look absolutely gorgeous?'  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink Russell: 'This is not part of the living arrangement. I do not pose with stuffed animals.'  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink Russell often lounges on the bed during the day. When we are in bed, Russell insists on sharing.  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink The colour version of the black and white shot of Russell. Note that he still has the same face.  urlLink
3,557,723
female
23
Student
Aries
28,July,2004
urlLink zzzZZZzzzZZZzzz  urlLink