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3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 05,June,2004 | Wow, this is really sad...All of my friends are away so instead I'm spending my time over a celebirty obsession of Craig Nicholls, or as I like to call him CN, (the crazy lead guitarist and singer of The Vines) who looks like he's stoned...but..oh well...so does Green Poncho Boy... Anyway, for all of you Vines lovers out there (like myself). Here's the most amazing music video ever!!!!!!... Ride...(I'm lazy so just cut and paste this in the address box yourself)... http://www.nme.com/features/107518.htm If you want more of my pointless ramblings of CN or the lyric to Ride, go to my blog...you know where it is... |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 05,June,2004 | Ok, we officially need to get some better posts on here, Ransom posting about how bored he is...come on...hm...we need something good to post about...ok, everyone post a link to there favorite site and say what it is. Yeah, that might work, every so often someone just post something like favorite band or something, then everyone visit the site/listen/whatever the thingy then comment on it... |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 05,June,2004 | ya im gonna post on blog of the damned about my bordom...ok so if anyone has any ideas of what i can do than please post and answer. and if anyone can guess what i'm doing while i pass the time until i get a post telling me what to do... i could be: A: Eating B: watching TV (bonus points if you can guess what im watching) C: Sleeping in an odd place (like on a tv) D: Helping Mrs. Van Doodles find her poodles Z: learning my alphebet E: catching somthing (maybe myself) on fire F: still on the computer typeing more possible answers G: or not post any and all answers to this 'riddle' that winner gets...i dont know what yet, but somthing...ewwww a mystery....its...mysterious!?! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 04,June,2004 | Calling all members of Ted! We should be getting together at my house for practice/recording at around 11 today until as long as you can stay. If you need directions, I suggest you look online for them, because I'm no good at them. Anyway, I'll be on AIM if you need me for anything else. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 04,June,2004 | im out of 'go ol' Monty-G' lol but ya its kinda cool and kinda sad, but i know this will be posted in blog of the damned like a million times but o well thats too bad. and i know that everyone feels at least a little sad bout' leaving. (well eccept maybe kenis) i mean wats up with him not being here? i know it was a family thing but really! anywho on with my rant, im sad to see everyone go but wat can i do about it. i mean no one is sad to see me go...(please post and tell me im wrong...or not)....so any ideas on another way to stay in really close touch? i didnt think so. and i said it in my personal blog (ransomsblog.blogspot.com) that at the end-ish of the summer i will be having a pool party for the whole class...so keep ur schedules open kinda. there u go im done...for now ::insert evil laugh:: |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,June,2004 | being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up. these are the best days of our lives. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,June,2004 | ok my turn.....wow...its actually over. it's actually done. montgomery really did change me guys. it's like, my life. these past three years have been the best years of my life and i have a feeling they always will be. i have the best.....and i mean the best friends ever and i dont wana let that go. I'ma miss every single one of you, yeah even you taco *starts crying* i love you... all of you. Thanks for making my life |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,June,2004 | sorry |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,June,2004 | ok my turn.....wow...its actually over. it's actually done. montgomery really did change me guys. it's like, my life. these past three years have been the best years of my life and i have a feeling they always will be. i have the best.....and i mean the best friends ever and i dont wana let that go. I'ma miss every single one of you, yeah even you taco *starts crying* i love you... all of you. Thanks for making my life |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,June,2004 | Wow, guy's you no what, all the crap that everyone say's about, missing each other and how you'll always remeber. Yeah, well, it's time for me to say it, and for the first time I mean it. Only two years at Montgomery, but damn, best two years of my life. We have to keep this blog going, and I'm gonna start having a bunch of parties with all the Montgomery people's. Oh, yeah and cheesy inpirsation chapel speech thingy, you guys remember the barn, thats our class, awesome together but even when we are broken up made into another barn, or furniture, we are still Montgomerian's at heart, still a part of the barn. God, I'm gonna miss this school (::sniff, sniff::). |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,June,2004 | As my present to all of you, I'm allowing each of you to ask me a question, any question about anything, and I will answer it. It's your choice how you want to ask me, you can email me, IM me, or even just ask me in the comments. Oh, and if you really want to know how I feel about graduating, you can just go to my urlLink blog and read the latest urlLink post . |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,June,2004 | Ok, today was graduation, blah blah blah I love you guys with all my heart blah blah blah. Guess what. I have news. I love you people so much, you will never truly be rid of me. So, this summer and next year at school, don't just forget about all of your friends. You haven't seen the last of Tori... |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,June,2004 | that was the best year i have ever had, and no i am not lying to you, i have never had a more meaningfull, fun, amazing, awesome, slinkster cool, time ever. and i know that a lot of you think that too, but i am just stating facts like i allways do. the best parts of the entire year: 1. the first day of school. 2. the first dance (when i met tucker). 3. the malvern dance (not the kiss). 4. the play. 5. the whole (yes whole) canada trip (moaches!) 6. graduation 7. getting hugs from everyone 8. knowing that i will never forget any of you or the stuff we went through, no matter how hard i try (ill only be trying to forget some things) 9. seeing every one together for the last time and loving everything about it all. thank you so much for all the wonderfull and not so wonderfull times we had, it was the most amazing year i have ever had and will stay the best danmmed year ever! -Rachel (AKA sporko) |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,June,2004 | Next time somebody gives you a brown receipt which they claim will defeat a satanic 400-year old cat who has possessed a Chinese businessman, you'd better darn well take it! Taken from urlLink SomethingAwful.com . |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 02,June,2004 | The new blog is born!!! The address is... http://tacohut.blogspot.com/ so one of you smart folk add my blog to the side bar thingy. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 02,June,2004 | So how was everyone's last day here at Montgomery? I had fun. I did stuff. I had fun. Again. Oh, just just for the record, I'm not wearing women's underwear (suckers). Crap. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 01,June,2004 | actualy that is a realy good CD, i also have it (and have had it for a while). the single 'take me out' is realy good, and no tuck your not the only one who knows of them. blah, um... yeah, i still want a kit kat bar, i saw one in the superfresh, but i didnt have anymoney and my mum wouldnt let me buy it grr. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 01,June,2004 | Your random history lesson of the day. (Because it pertains to my 20th Century Project). Franz, also known as Francis, Ferdinand was the Archduke of Austria-Hungary in 1914. In early July, he and his wife were driving through the town of Sarajevo, Bosnia, when 19 year-old Gavrilo Princip stepped out of the crowd and opened fire. This event triggered world war 1, one of the bloodiest military conflicts of all time. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 01,June,2004 | for some reason the hyperlink on the last post died or something, so heres the address...http://www.franzferdinand.co.uk/ |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 01,June,2004 | FRANZ FERINAND: sure they're named after a pyscho military leader, and sure they sing creepy songs about being gay with a guy named Micheal but they rock!! These guys are all like funky retro garage rocky and thats awesome. Some of you may have heard of there single 'take me out' (::cricket:: maybe not...). anyway you guys have to buy the CD, which is self titled. Oh yeah, there also British, this is kinda crapy site becuase the left out all the music but heres there homepage... urlLink |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 28,July,2004 | ok, rj has changed his campagin... and a few people cant make it. so, now... if you can come to our house tommrow (thursday) from noon to 6 be there. experience dosent matter. call for directions if you need them (6106400605) spork |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 27,July,2004 | Tomorrow. 2-8 PM. My house. Death Gate campaign. Be there. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 26,July,2004 | If you are coming to my D&D tomorrow (Death Gate campaign), or if you would like to, please go to urlLink my blog and vote. Times would be 2-8 PM. If you are not on the current list (Doug, Gus, Ben, Gabo), please comment on this post and leave your name and say that you would like to come. AND VOTE!!! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 26,July,2004 | RJ and i have managed to set up our own DnD session, its a new epic level (20 - 50) its called the black pantheon. so far... whos coming: RJ, me, evan, eric tait, and alex d. it ought to be fun. so we are looking for one more player... must be experienced , may not be a first time player. also... RJ knows the rules for playing gods ::wink wink:: everyone is starting at around level 20. its on thursday at the paper bag (RJ's and my house) from noon to six. call if you need directions (6106400605). roll a d20 to see if you can come. SPORK and RJ |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 26,July,2004 | How does Thursday 2-8 sound? |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 24,July,2004 | D&D at my house Wednesday 2-8. Continuation of the Death Gate campaign. If you were there last time, feel free to come again. If not, please ask permission. Not a comedy campaign (Ben). BE THERE! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 24,July,2004 | ok i messed up the last band prediction post... bumblebeez 81 are not a garage rock band, i was listening to the wrong cd at the time... its actaully the new hives, lol, so yea u have to get that cd if that idea sounds good... bumblebeez 81 is like gorillaz but much dirtyier, lots of distorion guitar and crazy bass beats and semi-rap, semi-rock lyrics... u really have to here them to understand it... so try to pick up the cd if u see it. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 23,July,2004 | three awesome bands for you today... Bumblebeez 81- these guys r pretty garage rocky but all there songs r mixed by one of there own who is a pro dj so really cool sounding. Very slickly combining hives and white stripes...these guys have a video that im sure is gonna be playing on mtv very soon so look out for them. Whirlwind Heat- i gurantee you have never and will never hear of these guys from anyone but me... they are very odd, have thier own flare, a personal favorite of mine... The Dirtbombs- love LOVE these guys, very cool have two of every intersting, but are still pretty smooth and jazzy, kinda up beat too but still rocking i have a few other bands that you should check out but arent as good and have no chance at stardom.... -The Soledad Brothers (blues...no one here would like them) -Blanche (smooth as silk) OK, im done.. goodbye until next time... |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 23,July,2004 | well this is my not so formal good bye for all you. oh, this is your last chance to see my hair in its slighty pink stage... in about 4 days i am leaving for NY state and i am gonna be dying my hair black and red (or blond) again (because i look good that way). so if you feel the need to talk, see, or hang out with me for the next month or till after school starts, best to do it now. and, oh wait, for all you ex-montGs, i problay wont be seeing you for a long long time ::evil laugh:: ... gonna be busy as hell. so uh... fare thee well. spork. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 22,July,2004 | ok the party is a no go, no one commented and i cant do it becasue im not sure anyone will even sdhow. All you had to do was comment and you could come...o except for sporko, who can always bbe counted on for a vague piontless, un-defineing comment. Ok so becasue of you there is no party and if you show up you will be luaghed at, attacked by dogs and locked in a room with keegan. ok so next time you want to come to a party of mine, just follow the frickin' directions!! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 20,July,2004 | Ok poeple my casa is open for a party on friday!! Anyone who wants to come just comment... and you can bring friends, everyone who reads this must tell someone about this, and mention their name in the comment. Please get as many poeple as you can. If you need info call my house or email me at [email protected]. Oh, yeah details... um.... from like 5 to whenever.... and not sure about food yet but we will PROBABLY feed you. I think thats it but please send this to everyone who you know and hopefully knows me!! ok, this party will only be good if a lot of people show. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 17,July,2004 | IIIIIIIIIIIIIII'M BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 15,July,2004 | Don't click urlLink this ! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 14,July,2004 | dougie you must call me at my dads as soon as possible! HURRY ( in no immediate danger, but for something that we must do) |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 13,July,2004 | look at the title |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 12,July,2004 | hello urlLink |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 12,July,2004 | See the new urlLink Teen Girl Squad! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 12,July,2004 | I really havent posted anything yet and i just wanted to... anyone who has an idea about what i should do with my broken mp3 player (this is the 3rd one of that kinda that has broken through no fault of my own). ya post on here or on my own blog... ransomsblog.blogspot.com. thanks |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 10,July,2004 | Is it just me or have Ransom and Emily not been posting the last few weeks. What happened to them? |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 07,July,2004 | Presenting the brand-new urlLink danmmed shirt ! Get yours today! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 06,July,2004 | Is it just me, or are people neglecting good ol' BotD, their faithful blog, for the new RhythmSection blog? Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I do sorta have a preference (being a founder and all). Keep BotD alive! Post stuff! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,July,2004 | Back in the age of pirates, there was one ship that ruled the seas. It was a typical pirate ship, with a typical captain. The only strange thing was that the captain always wore a red shirt. One day, one of the crew members went up to the captain and asked, 'Why do you always wear that red shirt?' 'Oh that?' asked the captain. 'I wear that so that if I ever get shot, you will never see the blood, so that you can keep in fighting the same.' And so the guy walked away thinking OK, that's pretty cool. We've got a pretty great guy for our captain . Later that day, an enemy ship started approaching. The pirates got ready for battle, and started sailing towards the enemies. They shot a few warning shots, which were responded with other shots. Soon, both sides were almost ready to fight when the captain yelled back to the crew, 'Quick! Go get my brown pants!' |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 05,August,2004 | Dance like hypnotized chickens, my young uns!!!!!!!! Dance...dance...DANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 04,August,2004 | ::wave:: good bye for now, ill see you all in a few weeks, for i am leaving for NY in about an hour. (feel the need to make me feel loved? special? not so alone? email me ( urlLink [email protected] ) or call my mums cell, but i have been forbiden to tell you what that is online, so you gonna have to ask someone at my house, hence you gotta call the house first. so much work, but it pays off, you get to talk to yours truly) for now, the one, the only, spork. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 03,August,2004 | ok sop since everyone is doing it i took the daunte inferno tst thingy too...and i did better than Sporko or Flabo....i got limbo hahahaha and i actually took it honestly! suprise! ya so im too lazy and or stupid to post is on the blog but o well i think u can live with the heartbreak. |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 02,August,2004 | ok, i took the test twice, the first time i got in the 9th level (the worst) the second time i didnt do so bad.... only 5th level. The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Fifth Level of Hell! Here is how you matched up against all the levels: Level Score urlLink Purgatory (Repenting Believers) Very Low urlLink Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers) Very Low urlLink Level 2 (Lustful) High urlLink Level 3 (Gluttonous) Low urlLink Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious) Low urlLink Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy) Extreme urlLink Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics) Moderate urlLink Level 7 (Violent) Very High urlLink Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers) Extreme urlLink Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous) Very High Take the urlLink Dante's' Inferno Test |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 02,August,2004 | I was sent the following email and rather than forwarding it I thought I'd just post it on the blog -- obviously this only has meaning for some members, so if not just ignore it, sorry to waste your time --as for everyone else, I know you might have already seen this, but whatever. PLEASE FORWARD TO OTHER FRIENDS & FAMILY THANKS!!! OCEAN CITY REMEMBERS EMILY 07-08-1990 – 12/11/02 WHEN: THURSDAY, AUGUST 5, 2004(FAMILY DAY IN OCEAN CITY) WHERE: GILLIAN’S WONDERLAND PIER / OCEAN CITY’S BOARDWALK AT 6th STREET TIME: 1:00 – 5:00 P.M. 4 HOURS OF FUN! ENJOY ALL AMUSEMENT RIDES FOR ONLY $10.00 BENEFITS: THE EMILY KOENIG MEMORIAL FUND (Managed by the Philadelphia Foundation – supports vaccine awareness & research and scholarships for children) HELP WIPE OUT MENINGITIS. . . SAVE THE LIFE OF A CHILD CONTACT INFORMATION: urlLink www.littletreasurebooks.com / urlLink www.gillians.com Email: Paula Lizzi at urlLink [email protected] John Kavchok at urlLink [email protected] |
3,413,707 | male | 15 | Chemicals | Taurus | 02,August,2004 | Well...here I am....posting something...hmmmm...oh what the heck! The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Second Level of Hell! Here is how you matched up against all the levels: Level Score urlLink Purgatory (Repenting Believers) Very Low urlLink Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers) Moderate urlLink Level 2 (Lustful) High urlLink Level 3 (Gluttonous) Moderate urlLink Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious) Very Low urlLink Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy) Moderate urlLink Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics) Moderate urlLink Level 7 (Violent) Moderate urlLink Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers) High urlLink Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous) Moderate Take the urlLink Dante's Inferno Test |
3,558,115 | female | 25 | indUnk | Scorpio | 06,June,2004 | Yes my first entry! I really like to do this a long time ago when I found out to one of my friends this blogspot thing.... Its cool!! No need to write... If you guys don't know yet, one of my past time is writing to my diary, I have 3 notebooks filled with stuff regarding my life and it is nice to share what’s going on with my life to my friends. I hope you can visit this page everytime. Just to let you know who I really am, and what kind of person I am (its the same thing right!) haha... So everyday I will write my high time and low time... Right now my HIGH TIME: Singing again! It’s been a long time, I love to sing and I’m going to look for a way to join the choir again. That is my passion, but do not ask me to sing in public because it's not my thing to memorize lyrics of the song, but if you will request beforehand I can sing it for you... I also sing in weddings and funerals (joke!), so if you guys need a wedding singer just give me a ring! DOWN TIME: I wasn't able to sleep well I do not know why,,, maybe because there is a lot of things going on with my mind, my work, friends and family... work because I don't know yet if I will resign or not.... it's a question and you know how hard it is to look for a high paying job so I'm still thinking it over and over and over again!!! I just hope I will find an answer this week... Friends yes I love all my friends but I miss some of them specially my PREX family, we don't have time to bond anymore because of my schedule, I really miss them and I will try to make it up to you guys! My family, yes because there is a lot of things I want to do with our house I want to buy things, but of course I need money to buy it,,,, maybe one by one I can buy things for them... specially T.V. I want to buy my mom a TV for her room so that she will be able to watch even if she is in her room.... Anyway I’m sleepy now so till next time I hope I will have time tom. To write… |
4,191,471 | male | 25 | Communications-Media | Aquarius | 17,August,2004 | 'CATWOMAN Thirty-Seven' - Paul Gulacy This cover has a very introspective feel, with the obvious lack of action. Her left leg outstretched, her right leg brought up in front to protect her body from the fandom gawping (And sometimes glooping) on the cover. This direct and obvious confusion of two alternate viewpoints; Laid-back and threatened, would seem to suggest a confusion. Catwoman's face is level-pegging the Moon, the satellite which gave us 'the month', a popular publishing unit. Combine the two elements of feminity and the monthly unit and you're obviously led to the menstrual cycle. Catwoman is ready for action and yet not ready. She obviously has the painters in. 'NIGHTWING Ninety Nine' - Scott McDaniel The obvious positioning of a clock (A method of time-keeping, a storage place for units, a la, the Moon) with the fearful symmetry of a left-leg extended and a right withheld would be enough, but the blood smeared down his leg (With no obvious wound) and his attempt to find solace in comics' classical male father figure would seem to suggest narrative parity's between this work and the Catwoman released this month. Nightwing gets his red wings. |
4,191,471 | male | 25 | Communications-Media | Aquarius | 12,August,2004 | Obviously I have misjudged the fandom elite with it's excellent taste. RAPE CRISIS hits the number one spot with a bullet ('If any of the events of this issue have affected you personally then dial 0898 GET-ALIFE-NERD and stop reading so many comics'). Only briefly holding back another comic which is riding a poor innocent all the way to the top - Don't worry, Jim! We'll save you! Help is on the way! Number of titles featuring female leads: 24 Number of Nu-Marvel revamps: 19 Number of titles not featuring super-heroes: 2 And as the ULTIMATE take-over of the ULTIMATE Top Ten continues, we reach the anals (sic) of the NOT QUITE SO STUNNING teens. Normally, a time for ugly sexual changes and perverse thoughts executed in secret... Here we find WOLVERINE: END. Obviously subtlety is creeping back into the comics world, as next month it's DAREDEVIL: BANJO STRING. Number of even-valued issues: 26 Number of odd-valued issues: 24 Number of animal/insect-based titles: 12 The fact that the 100th issue of GRANT MO-FUCKING-RRISON's JLA languishes at 17 in the charts is a sordid and unfortunate story. But seeing as how DC's latest marketing ploy is TARGET THE RETARD, it's unsurprising. Another GRA-SHITEING-NT MORRI-CUNTING-SON success story, NEW-X-MEN has also sunk to 23 from it's sterling position atop the Pops only a short time ago. When he was still writing it. I sense a mystery! Number of titles written by Brits: 11 Number of titles featuring WOLVERINE: 9 Number of series titles featuring superlatives: 17 Also, only two team-ups this month. Quite a disappointing turnout really. Hardly the hardy days of yore when you had to print gatefold covers just to get all the teams/characters/side-kicks/passers-by who were headlining the latest mini series. One team-up I'd rather not touch by a creator I enjoy and another one I'd definitely not touch by two creators I wouldn't spot in a police line-up if they were wearing HAWK & DOVE costumes. Number of titles I actually bought: 2 Number of titles I was vaguely interested in: 12 |
4,191,471 | male | 25 | Communications-Media | Aquarius | 12,August,2004 | 1. IDENTITY CRISIS #1 (DC) 2. SUPERMAN #206 (DC) 3. ASTONISHING X-MEN #2 (Marvel) 4. ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #60 (Marvel) 5. ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #61 (Marvel) 6. ULTIMATE FANTASTIC FOUR #6 (Marvel) 7. ULTIMATE FANTASTIC FOUR #7 (Marvel) 8. UNCANNY X-MEN #445 (Marvel) 9. X-MEN #158 (Marvel) 10. ULTIMATE FANTASTIC FOUR #8 (Marvel) 11. ULTIMATE X-MEN #47 (Marvel) 12. ULTIMATE X-MEN #48 (Marvel) 13. AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #509 (Marvel) 14. WOLVERINE END #4 (Marvel) 15. MARVEL KNIGHTS SPIDER-MAN #3 (Marvel) 16. AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #508 (Marvel) 17. JLA #100 (DC) 18. BATMAN #629 (DC) 19. WOLVERINE #16 (Marvel) 20. TEEN TITANS #12 (DC) 21. AMAZING FANTASY #1 (Marvel) 22. EXCALIBUR #2 (Marvel) 23. NEW X-MEN #2 (Marvel) 24. AVENGERS #84 (Marvel) 25. DAREDEVIL #61 (Marvel) 26. CONAN #5 (Dark Horse) 27. SPECTACULAR SPIDER-MAN #15 (Marvel) 28. SPECTACULAR SPIDER-MAN #16 (Marvel) 29. FANTASTIC FOUR #514 (Marvel) 30. PUNISHER #7 (Marvel) 31. PUNISHER #8 (Marvel) 32. ACTION COMICS #816 (DC) 33. ASTONISHING X-MEN #1: DIRECTORS CUT (Marvel) 34. FLASH #211 (DC) 35. IDENTITY DISC #1 (Marvel) 36. ADVENTURES OF SUPERMAN #629 (DC) 37. INCREDIBLE HULK #73 (Marvel) 38. MARVEL KNIGHTS 4 #6 (Marvel) 39. WOLVERINE/PUNISHER #4 (Marvel) 40. OUTSIDERS #13 (DC) 41. JSA #62 (DC) 42. WANTED #4 (Image) 43. ROBIN #127 (DC) 44. JLA: ANOTHER NAIL #2 (DC) 45. POWERLESS #1 (Marvel) 46. DOOM PATROL #1 (DC) 47. AVENGERS/THUNDERBOLTS #4 (Marvel) 48. EXILES #48 (Marvel) 49. TRANSFORMERS: GEN 1 Vol. 3 #5 (Dreamwave) 50. X-MEN UNLIMITED #3 (Marvel) |
3,826,242 | male | 42 | indUnk | Aries | 23,July,2004 | Starts off disciplined. I will lay particular favourites for say £10. Soon up £20. Then lay short-priced favourite that drifts in the market. Should I back it back for a free bet. Decide not to. After all I am disciplined. Favourite wins. I am down £19. Next race decide to try to get this back plus £10. Lay short-priced favourite that drifts. Should I back back for free bet and no risk? No I decide. Favourite wins. I am now down around £80. Decide to lay the next short-priced favourite. It drifts. Should I back it back for free bet and no risk? No. The same pattern can't happen three times in a row can it? It does. Am now down £138. Draw down £200 from credit card. I am going to get this cash back. Lay next short-priced favourite. It shortens further- dramatically further. Everyone wants to get on this horse. I resign myself to losing another £258 as this now is my libility if I want to win back my previous losses with £15 extra. It loses!! Up a paltry £12 after credit costs taken into account. |
3,826,242 | male | 42 | indUnk | Aries | 21,July,2004 | The nature of reality often comes into mind. The greatest mystery being why is there anything rather than nothing? I've come to the conclusion that God dissolved himself aeons ago into the fabric of the cosmos so that He could experience true liberation. After all if you control everything how can you be free? The universe now progresses along its evolutionary path according to certain basic physical laws. We experience them. We are the echoes or pieces of the original divine conciousness. Besides having cosmic thought s I am walking the Ulster Way- a 600 mile or so path around the north of Ireland. I will post the odd picture of my travels |
3,826,242 | male | 42 | indUnk | Aries | 19,July,2004 | Just returned from a trip to the West with The Beloved and her daughter. Called in with the Daughter's father in Barna Co. Galway. He took her for the day so myself and Liz did a little touring around Oughterard and the lovely Lough Corrib. Ended up camping in a remote spot by the lake that night near Glann. Just the sound of fighting terns from a little islet offshore. In the morning a swim in the soft lake water - alright it took me about ten minutes to immerse myself! My expressions were somewhat gargoyle -like. but once I was in it was bliss. Next day we set off for Kerry to try for the second time to get to Skellig Michael. urlLink http://whc.unesco.org/pg.cfm?cid=31&id_site=757 Skellig is a rocky island off the coast which was inhabited by monks from around 400 AD. It has no springs and very little greenery. The perfect place for a monk to escape the pressures of 6th Century life. It's bloody hard to get to. the conditions have to be just right before the boatmen will venture out. Last Friday was not the day. We arrived as low fog shrouded the islands and surrounding hills creating bizarre mysterious cloudshapes - the 'teasing mists of Skelligs' - perhaps I'll write a song! Next day we headed north to visit friends on the island of Inisbofin. Neither myself or Liz had been on the island before. The sun was splitting the trees as we headed off from Cleggan (perfect weather to land on Skellig!). Cars have to be left behind. The islanders have managed to bring a few battered wrecks onto the island where there's no road tax. On the island we feasted on the most beautiful leg of lamb - bought from a butchers in Clifden - beside the Celtic Shop. A local fisherman left a few mackerel which we fried in butter and smeared with harissa and soy sauce. Delicious!!!! Next day we lounged on the East Side beach - I roasted my balding pate. It's now a kind of pinky purply colour. Long drive back to Belfast where we learned that one of Liz's erswhile mates had died of liver failure at the age of 38. North Belfast is a place of tragedy. Liz went to another funeral today of a woman in her early 40s - the mother of 7 kids who committed suicide last week. One of her sons had killed himself last year. |
3,826,242 | male | 42 | indUnk | Aries | 02,July,2004 | 2nd July 2004 What does a gambling Buddhist put in a post? Can there be such a thing as a gambling Buddhist. Am I a Buddhist? I attend a sangha here in rainy Belfast on Tuesdays and sometimes Sundays. At the zendo we sit in silence for 30 minutes then walk in silence for ten minutes then meditate again for 45 minutes. On Fridays usually I gamble and lose quite a lot of money. Today I didn't lose. I actually made £14. Last week I lost £345. As a Buddhist I see my gambling as 'grasping'. - chasing after an illusion that cannot ever bring real happiness. What it does bring is momentary gratification. Like any addiction it gives the illusion of power for a few moments before inevitably reality sinks in. Throughout the lifetime of this blog I'll try to give an insight into the mind of a gambler albeit one who wishes he could lead an 'alternative' life. |
3,826,242 | male | 42 | indUnk | Aries | 02,August,2004 | Continued along the Ulster Way yesterday - a 600 odd mile traipse around the north of Ireland. A fine evening found us up Shanes Hill Road at Ballyboley Forest. Through a bunch of spruce trees and over a stile or two to a vantage point overlooking Larne. The last time we were up here we could see as far as Scotland to the north-east, the Mournes to the south with a hint of the Isle of man on the horizon and to the west Slemish and the Sperrins and of course Lough Neagh our inland sea. This evening though we had haze - whether pollution or innoccuous heat haze or a mixture of both I don't know. Every month here seems to have a dominant colour. In May the yellow gorse or whin dominates. This month its the purple of the heather and the thistle. The darker bell heather mixes in with the lighter type of heather ( I can't remember the technical term!) I picked blueberries. I never realised they were so common here. My memories of blueberries focus round Norwegian forests where on rare visits as children we coloured our hands and faces purple with the juice. We walked over to the cairned top of Agnews Hill and decided to stop there as the sun was declining rapidly. Walking back we watched as the sun set directly over urlLink Slemish - St Patrick's Hill. White moths fluttered around us as we made our way back to the car. Black slugs began their dusk feeding. Today I completed the stetch of the walk with Tess, my sisters dog. I drove up the lonely and desolate Starbog Road past the quarry where a couple of years ago a local man was pulled into the crushing machine and killed. Tess had to be lifted over the stiles but frolicked madly in the soft mossy grass. We saw frogs. The weather was misty but warm- no spectacular sunsets this evening! |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 31,July,2004 | haahax .... my title says it all .... i was home all dae ... nothing to do. I had remedial in the morning. 7.30 - 8.30 ... but i reached my class at around 7.45! i woke up late... hahax i was suppose to wake up at 6.45... but i woke up at 7.20.... haahax ... real dead! i took a cab and rushed all daa way to skool.. but, Thank God ... i wasn't scolded by Miss Fung. haahax ... i Was suppose to go npcc todae ... but i did not go in the end ... becuz i did not pack my uniform and stuff... so i had no time in da mornin too.... so did not go lor... after the remedial .... me and timmy went to bedok interchange's macdonald.. i ate bIg BrEaKfaSt! *slUrPs ... hahax ... i went home after breakfast .... at home, i slept for about 3 hours! Sleepy me! when i woke up ... i realised that i was the only one at home! wahahax .... i called my parents .... they said they asked me, while i was sleeping, if i wanted to go out ... but i did not answer. Wad caN i say? I was sleeping wadz ! hahax ... after that, i watched a DVD -- My boss's daughter -- daa female lead actress in daa show veh pretty ... but not as pretty as the person i like! WAAHAHAHAX.... i mean... i'm serious ! Bleahx ... Praise God for giving me such a wonderful friend. =). i not sure whether i'll be going out afterwards lehx .... but my pri skool fren who lives near me, juz asked me if i wanted to go to daa market dere and hav a drink .... Anyway ... can't wait till tml... Got church lehx ! i veh kan cheong! wahahah .... anyway ... auntie hwee Phen gonna treat me, gordon and heng lunch at cafe cartel tml ! lolx .... hmmx ... tink i got nth much to day bahx .... juz wait till tml for my blog bahx ... haahax..... *But be very careful to keep the commandment and the law that Moses the servant of the LORD gave you: to love the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to obey his commands, to hold fast to him and to serve him with all your heart and all your soul.* [Joshua 22:5] ... For all those who are straying away from God. Take care and God bless. |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 30,July,2004 | WaH!..... today sooo ShiOk ... i came home early ... slept for 30 mins... had my lunch... and used the computer from 2pm to 6.30 ! wahahaha! But .... mUmmi now veh angry wif me.... =( . Plan on doin mah homework after i finish writing my Blog for daa dae ! hahax.... Actualli hor ... i wanted to go Timmy's house and play soccer at 2.30 budden .... i tot my mom sure will not allow de.... so ended up usin com. lor .... which oso had the same ending... lol. Today in skool was fun! Short day it was. First period was reading period. FollOweD by PE. But ! My PE teacher went wif the kaYaKing GaLx for Competition.... he ish their Coach wadx .... so mUst Go LoR.... wahahha. The relief teacher for PE was a chi teacher... den dunno how to speak eng.... so when some of my malay frens asked for a toilet break, She juz shook her head! hahaax... den hor .... when the bell rang, she Left! HAHAX .... she wad suppose to stay for another period in the class.. but she left ! hahax... so ... we had 35 mins of freeeedom! But .... suprisingly, the class was veh quiet.... hahax.... Den ... we had maths... Veh BorInG ! bUt Time SeeMs to paSs VerY fast ... hahax.... den it waS RECESS! I hAd my NuGgEts .... YuMz .... AfTer SkoOl ... Heng WeNt home.... Den i went home too lorz.... So ... i rEaChed HoMe VeRy eArlY.... hahax.... By the wAy ... i love frIdAyS .... cuz ... TherE isH gonna be Oikos At night ! .... CoOlz ... Get to Noe More AbOut God, His word and everything! WhEe !~ HahAx .... It will be at 8pm ... so theres still 1 hr b4 i LeAve mah House... lolx .... think i'll Juz stop here fer ToDay... Tml Gonna Be A vEry Tiring dAy ... HAv NpCc .... hAhAx ... bUhbYex ! *For God So loved the World that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. [John 3:16] .... Take carez... ciaoz |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 29,July,2004 | Haahax ... juz finished my tuition foR chinese.. My tuition teacher's name is mr mak. haahax. like calling him mud. Anyway, today's day ish not that badd. Had fun with my frens in skool. yAy! Budden ... has a we juz recieved a new time-table ! So sian ... this skool always change the time-table here and there 1.. bLeAhx.. Anyway ... Mr. kUah ish bAck.. tt means no more fun during reading period. haahax ... these few days ish the Sec 3 adventure camp. Den all daa PE teachers hafta go and supervise... that means... NO TAF CLUB ! wahahaha! lolx ... today actualli oso quite borinG bahX... we did not play SoccEr ! heng had CCA.. den everyone wasn't at the usual place at all... boo! Hopefully tml, we're gonna play soccer fer PE ... WhEe~ haahx Btw ... this ish moi first Bloggie... so hor ... tell me wadcha tink bout it. =) hahax... ArgH ... my hamsters biting the cage again! irritating noise.. ! i Tink thats about my day bahx... Oh Yah ! i had a 2 hr nap ! SHIOK MAN! haahax... i slept and dream abt ............Nothing... all i saw was a pitch black senario... wahaha ... get it ? nvm if u don get it... tts all ! Free on 15 August ? Why not come to noe the Lord? Its FRAN gelism ... So ... contact me fer more info ! hahax F -riends R -elatives A -ssociates N -eighbours |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 14,August,2004 | wAh !! these few days sho sianz 1 ..... all common test here and dere. nothing to write about actualli. Feeling very happy everyday! if i am not wrong hor .... ask anyone close to me ... they haven't seen me angry before. cuz i extremely seldom get angry! its like.... get angry for wad? waste ur enerrgy, time blah bla.... but if there is something that u hav to be firm with, be firm and serious with it! but u hafta let it go once it is done. well that is my philosophy. StAy happie always, despite of your everyday life!~ oh yah .... i juz cut my hair yesterday.... hahax .... bleahx. i juz came back from oikos like 1 hr ago. omg! my blogg ish getting shorter and shorter day by day! hahaahax. anyway.... to those people who are having the common test now.... Father Lord in Heaven, I come before You Lord to pray for all those people out there Lord. That Lord, You will guide them and give them the wisdom that they need for this period, while they have their common test in school Lord. Father that You will give them good health so that they will be able to pass the test with flying colours Lord. Father i pray that you will remove all the distraction that comes before them Lord. Father that through this Lord, that they might be able to glorify your Holy Name Lord. I thank You Lord, in Jesus' name, AMEN! Good luck for your test guys! study hard! |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 11,August,2004 | Sry guys! ..... this few days i could not update mah blog cuz of the curfew my father gave me and the common test which starts todae ! by The way.... hApPy bE-lAted bIrtHdAe SiNgaPoRe!~!~ hahahax .... These feew days were not very bad. the days were happy days~ hahaax.... on national day, amanda asked the youths to go for evangelistic team. Siok Hoon, Melody, Amanda, Fred(Yi heng) and myself went for the evangelistic team thing. Though the event was tiring, we learnt lots of things. We went around giving fliers, knocking on doors and stuff like tt at block 44, Beside mah Church. The thing took around 2 hr to finish combing the whole block.... hahaa. we had lunch with a few adults after that. Adults as in frm church. We studied at macdonald until 5.30. when we decided to go home and catch the national day parade at home. Siok Hong.... how was the atmosphere at the stadium? hahaax.... HAd fun though? bLeAhX .... anyway.... the next day was a skool holidae.... whee! i slept till 12pm! WAHAHA.... den, i studied for my maths, science and english. At night, my family went to Ang Mo Kio to collect my sista's spect from daa optician. Den come today. The first day of the common test. The english common test wasn't that hard... but it wasn't that easy too. If i am not wrong, there are lots of trick questions.... hahax. bLeAhx .... tink i'll juz stop here before my father comes home and see me using... kk ... God loves all of ya. Take care. bUhByeZ ... Whatever your pain, there will always be sunshine after the rain. Perhaps you may stumble, perhaps even fall, but God is always there to help you through it all. |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 06,August,2004 | bLeAhx .... toDay we had daa national day celebration in skool ... extremely boring! BUT! was happy for the class which won the amazing race! wahahhax..... dun need to noe y. Anyway .... after the national celebration hor.... i went back to my oLd sKoOl .... ReD sWaStiKa SkOol wif Heng, Xin wei, Donavan, Han Fei and cHubBy .... we mEt up wif quite a lot of teachers.... but all the teachers seemed to hav forgotten us. bOo! hahax .... After visiting and stuff like that, Yiheng, chubby and I went to fEnGshAn CC and have lunch.... afTer lunch, chubby and I went to the playground and chat about things that happened recently while Yi heng went to play sOccer .... After chatting for about 1 hour, chubby wanted to come to mah house. so he came lor. Den hor.... we tok tok and tok. Den, he went to see my hamsters. After seeing and playing wif them for awhile, one of my hamsters died ! that hamster was from a friend of my mom. She gave it to her recently only.... and after 1 or 2 months, it died! anyway .... had oikos at night. Very little people came. But, its alright. Cuz, in God's eyes, He doesn't see by the number of people that is around us, beside us, or wherever they may be. But, by the faith that we have in him. bLeAhx .... btw hor .... i can't realli use the computer these few days. Because of the nearing common test. So, if i can;t update my blog, realli SORRY! alright. Stop here for today. Take care and God bless u. *Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you. [Matthew 17:20] |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 05,August,2004 | ElLo !! .... hahahax .... today, when i woke up, i had hotdog bun! hahahax .... my mom woke up earlier than usual just to help me make my breakfast!! so touched... aww. AnYways ... today is just about a usual day in skool .... came home.... had my tuition ... mR. mAk againx.... realized that the class was actualli quite fun! wahahax .... there was once when he wanted to explain a word in english ... but he dunno how to sae it out.... so he said .... ' the bone like very crispy like dat' !!! wahahahah!!! the word was trying to mean that ' the bone will break easily; fragile' ...wahahaha! wah .... i veh bad lor ... laugh at ppl! Sry mAn ! anyways ... after tuiton, i met up wif heng for dinner at east point. we had Jacks Place. hahax ... the ambience was reallli 'GOOD' man. hahaha.... anyway .... there was these gal at daa restaurant hu was celebrating her birthdae lah .... den she and her mom somehow started quarrelling.... den the gal cried lor! she like so poor thing liddat! Her birthday oso cry! ..... luckily it wasn't me man! wahahahha... anyway.... i realised that my blog is getting shorter and shorter each day.... maybe thats becuz my dae ish sooo boring! wahaha.... veh happi cuz we gonna celebrate national day in skool tml! can wear home clothes seh! ShiOkA ! wahahaha ..... GottA cIaOz ..... TakE cArE... *For God did not send His Son to condemn the world, but the world through Him migh be saved. [John 3:17] |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 04,August,2004 | yoZ .... todae ish wednesday! nOthing realli special happenEd todae.... but recently, i hav been thinking about something. Whether i should ask tt someone the biG qns. hAix .... realli confused now. Not sure if this is the right path i should be taking. God lead me! anYway ... back to today. I had healTh checkup or health screening if u prefer it to be called that. They checked our weight, height, eyesight and daa back bone... We had our checkup during the upper secondary assembly ... so we could actualli see what was happening in the hall from the third floor. wahaha. it was the national day recollection thing again. den they had pUblIc caning. Mr teo caned a boi for truancy i tink. not very sure bout it. Nothing realli happened after skool... usual stuff.... i wanted to go pNp to dae 1 ! but i did not hav daa time. btw... pnp stands for Prayer and Praise. Its held in church and it ish very daa GooD! learn how to pray in groups and wif strangers... pray for the ChurCh ! Btw.... today ish my ChiNeSe teAcheRs birThdAe!!! hAppI bIrThDay cHeN lAo ShI !~! wahahahaz .... okiez ... gonna hav a early night so i wouldn't be waking up soo late every morning again. lolx.... God Bless u gUyz .... SeiZe eveery opportunity that comes ur way! for Every moment is an opportunity for that special someone who ish ready to seize it! *JeSuS rOcKz mAh lIfE bIg tImE!~ |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 03,August,2004 | hahahax... dun bother about my blog title. hiE again! bEen 24 hrs since i last met u here. wahahahx... so lame. Today isn't a bad day bahx.... Had mAths test today during mAthS lesson, which wAs a DisAstEr .... the test paper was easy ... but, I HAD NO CALCULATOR!!! aRgH .... i knew how to do the questions.. but i had no calculator! and all the digits in The qUesTions weRe soooo bIG!! wah lao! hahahax... aNyway. ... wE had hOme EcOns todae!~ its was quite fun though... hahax... we cookEd cHicKen stEw !!! aT firSt i tot that the stew would be like chicken stock .... and the soup will tast like water... but after cooking and tasting it during lesson, i found out that the chicken did taster quite good. hahax ... enjoying it. lolz ... bUt i gAve all the rest to raymond cuz i didn't want to diRty my cOntAinEr ... paisehx. As home econs was the last peiod, we had english remedial straight after the class. tHere For, we waited for mIss fUnG in clazz.. aLmoST the whole class ate the fooD that we cookEd during the english remedial leSsOn! whahahahax. i tHink that mIss fUng is realli dissapointed in my class! She was shouting and shouting at us, trying to make us quiet so we could do our work. bUt, we beacame noisier and noisier. Sry miss FunG !!!.... anyway ... after remedial, we plaYed sOcCer! wahahax .... i could have scored so many goal. But i miSsEd all! so sad! whaahahax ... nvm. =) theres always room for improvement. Went home after that. tHink ThatS about it. aNother boRing dAy. *But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. [Luke 6:35] mAy thE gOoD Lord shower His blessings on u abundantly! .... take care! |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 02,August,2004 | hArLoWz ~ i'm bAck ! muahahaha! Lolx.... Lets see... today. hmmx .... Today wasn't bad a day. It was quite boring larhx. WhEn i woke up, I went to skOol lor. So siAnz... i was so afraid that i would be late like the past few days. But, Thank God i prayed the night before that i will be able to wake up early and not be late. hahax .... God realli answered my prayer sia! AnYwayz .... after mOthEr tongue was PE ! bUdDen hor .... it was raining... and mr Alex cHuA was on LeAve. So, in the end we had mR. jAMes cHua. He agreed to let us play in the rain. but, provided we all agreed that if there ish thunDer or LighTing, we hafta go bAck to class. So, we agReed lor. Budden the skools PE co-ordinator, Mr BenJamIn tAn did not allow! So, we juz played awhile, did some warm-ups and thats it, the BelL rang. bLah blah blah .... we had tAf club. So nth to write about. hahahahax. After tAf .... wE went to line-up lor...while lining up, HAppy lIke SIAo man! I sAw Her! wahahax .... i did not see her in the morning cuz it was raining... but i saw her during ReCeSs! whahahahahx. MiSs hEr lots. HAHAHAHAX. jokin larhx. After recess... we had ouR pHoto ShoOt... hahax. i am in dAa mIdDle.... lolx that means i am daa bigget in size! wahaha! AnywaY ... After SkOoL ... i wEnt hOme, hElp mY fAthEr polish his cAr's LeAther seat... so mah fan! hahax .... but i took some photos! wahahha. nvm if u dun understand. lolx. i tink i'll stop around here bahx.... dun want to write another long composition like yesterday again. *Dun be scared, for the Lord God is there with you.. bUhByez .... God BleSs~! |
4,070,311 | male | 14 | Student | Taurus | 01,August,2004 | Yox ! its sundae...! wheE~ hahax .... today, i was out whole day man ! from 8.30 - 11.30! wahaha ... 15 hours out ! lolx.... lets start frm daa mornin. Alright... i Was SupPose to WakE up At 7am for mY tuition at dhoby Ghaut at 9am ... but Woke up at 8.20~! i was late ! i sms-ed my tuition teacher and told him that i wasn't able to make it for the tuition... so, i went to bathe lor.... after bathing, i called yi heng to find out bout wad time to meet in church and stuff... so i am to reach church by 9.00 for Bible study.... followed by the Main Service in the sanctuary. btw ... my church ish Bethesda Cathedral .... daa big and white Church tt looks like a Castle! lolx ... back to my story ... Before mAin servIce startEd, We SaNg WoRship Songs like, ' one way, Days of Elijah and many many more songs ' These songs realli made me think about God and His purpose of bringing me into this Earth that we are in. by The wAy, in the weeks Bulletin, there was this sign-[NO GOSSIPING] that struck me. it was like... i have been gossiping about people these few days! Is God trying to speak to me? so, I have decided that since God doesn't want us to gossip about other people... why not juz follow his commands? So guys ... if u see me gossiping hor.... remind me not to gossip alright? wahaha. aNd During tHe main service, Pastor talked about the Healing annoiting upon our church. That during the time of Jesus, Jesus sent 12 people to went out and heal everyone that is blind, sick, crippled and many more. etc. aT tHe eNd of the mAin service, Pastor called out for those hu has pain in the leg for healing... and surprisingly, there was a lot of people with pain in the leg ! there was like 15 of them! And after Pastor prayed, almost one third of them was healed! PRAISE THE LORD! After main service, Auntie Hwee Phen brought us out for lunch at cafe cartel .... was raining den. ... so the atmosphere wasn't there. =( . But, It was still a lunch that i enjoyed. =) ... During youth service, We split up into classes to ask if we had any difficulties while trying to share Christ with our friends... although i did not hav any qns, i learnt alot from there... After youth service ended, it was Gordon's audition for music ministry as a DruMmer ! keWlz coolz... haahx ... he played not bad..... But he was so shy that he wanted everyone to go out of the room except himself and timothy cheng. wahahax .... but .... we crawled back into the room to see him play! wahahahax... the best part was when we open the door soo big and he did not even notice the door open. lolx .... Anyway , something sad happened after that. its better that i don't tell about it. soMething that is not associated to me.... but i veh kaypo ... lolx..... wahh! i write until sooo long! wahaha.... okiex .... think that i'll stop till here. Continue tml. bUhbYeZ!~ God loves all of us inspite of how bad and evil we are. tAke cAre ~ |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 28,May,2004 | Okay, remember yesterday when I said there weren't that many cicadas here? Well, God must have been laughing at me the whole time I was bragging on my blog because yesterday afternoon when I took my niece out shopping I was totally almost attacked by these awful bugs! I can just see it now, God sitting up there laughing at me while I was trying my best to dodge these bugs and not get any on me. It was so awful I don't think I am ever gonna go out of the house again! I will stay inside until urlLink they go away! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 27,May,2004 | I am not sure if you all know about these lovely little bugs or not. All I know is that I really don't like them. In fact, I don't like bugs at all. Thankfully, they aren't that many of them here, but believe me, there are enough. If they were any worse I do not think I would be going out much. Anyway, if you don't know about these little bugs check out this urlLink site |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 23,May,2004 | I thought I would post today about how truly blessed I am. It has just been a great weekend of blessings for me. First off, I forgave one of my friends that needed me to forgive him and I realized that I can never stay mad at him. I also realized how truly blessed I am to have him in my life. Now, if we could just ever meet I would be even more blessed. ;-) Love ya! Also, I feel so blessed to have my wonderful family! I truly do not know where I would be without their love and support. Sometimes things can get a little crazy with all of the nieces, nephews and sisters here but I still love them just the same! My family rocks! Today was just a great end to my wonderful and blessed weekend. I got to spend time worshipping God today! I love worshipping God!! Woo hoo! I learned in church today what my SHAPE was. And to think all this time I thought I was just round and plump. I was totally wrong! God is so awesome!! Tonight my friend Amanda and her Mom stopped by for a surprise visit. It was soo great to see them again. I have not seen them in what feels like forever. It was great to see them again! They need to come back and visit more often. I love seeing friends again! I totally had an awesome weekend! Praise God!! He is the BEST! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 20,May,2004 | It doesn't take much for my heart to break and you have done it for what seems the millionth time... It doesn't take much for me to shed a tear and you have done so many things to make me cry... I am tired of having a broken heart and crying. Maybe one day it will change. |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 19,May,2004 | Well, today was one of those days that I just felt kind of BLAH. I can't really describe the day other than that. Just BLAH. That's still how I feel tonight. I don't know, why don't things ever work out the way you plan them to? I guess God has other plans for us sometimes. Oh well. Hopefully the next time I post I will feel better than just BLAH. |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 17,May,2004 | Hello again everyone. I had some blog complications last week and lost my whole blog but never fear, I am back with a new blog. I just don't think I like this html stuff. Maybe one day I will figure it out. Who knows? Anyway, not really much excitement in Kentucky this weekend. Same ole boring stuff. If anyone wants to come and visit, feel free. :-) The only exciting thing I did was go to the tanning bed and get burned. How fun is that? Oh well... more blogs to come if I don't delete it again. |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 17,June,2004 | 'So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.' 2 Corinthians 4:18 I can't wait to see the unseen one day! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 13,June,2004 | In my old age, 25, which is almost 30, I have been struggling with finding my purpose in life. I visited my sister's church a couple of weeks ago and the sermon series was based on 'The Purpose Driven Life' by Rick Warren. So, I got the book and have been reading it. I have to say that I am really enjoying it so far. If you haven't read it I recommend that you do. I think we all struggle sometimes with finding our purpose and this urlLink book is a good guide to showing us how God has a purpose for all of us. |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 08,June,2004 | I came across this story and thought I would share it with all of you. Sometimes we forget that we can do nothing without God in our lives. Enjoy! I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20 One day I had some work to do around the house so I went to the store and bought some work gloves. I don't know why they call them work gloves -- they don't do any work. Look at them...they are flat and lifeless. What do you think it will take to get these gloves to do any work? That's right! I have to put my hands inside the gloves. They won't do a thing until I put my hand inside them. Once I put my hand in the work gloves, they can do all sorts of things. They can hammer nails, rake leaves, and hoe in the garden. They can open doors and lift and carry all kinds of heavy objects. As you know, of course, it isn't the gloves that are doing the work. It is my hands inside the gloves that are doing the work. You know, that is the same way it is with being a Christian. The apostle Paul explained it this way, 'I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.' Sometimes we may start thinking that we do some pretty great things. We may brag about how many people we have told about Jesus or we might tell everybody about how much work we do around the church. We might say, 'Look at me. I do this and I do that, I, I, I...' Ay! Ay! Ay! We have it all wrong! 'It is not I, but Christ who lives in me.' The next time you start to thinking that you have done something great, remember the work gloves. They can do nothing without a hand inside. You and I can do nothing without Christ inside. Dear Jesus, help us to remember that apart from you, we can do nothing. Amen. |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 06,June,2004 | I have been really bad about posting lately. I feel like it has been forever. I didn't fall off the face of the earth though, just in case any of you were wondering. :-) I have just been real busy. A lot goes on around my house when all my nieces and nephews are out of school. Not really much to post about though. I have found a new favorite drink. I am really addicted to Starbucks frappuccino. I tried to find a picture of it to post but I didn't have any luck. I never was really much of a coffee drinker but I am seriously addicted to these drinks. They are so good! If you haven't tried one you definitely should. More to come if anything exciting happens...! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 01,June,2004 | Well, schools are out here in Kentucky and that only means one thing...my niece Rachel has officially moved in for the summer. She does everything with me. I enjoy it though. She is fun to hang out with. So, that is really all that is going on here with me. Not much else to post about tonight but stay tuned, I am sure there will be more to come! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 29,July,2004 | Well, as you can see, I have given my blog a facelift. Thought it was time for a change. I am off to a family reunion this weekend. I will be leaving for the much dreaded venture tomorrow evening. The big event is Saturday. Wish me luck! The first question I am bombarded with every year never changes...'Do you have a boyfriend?' Sometimes I just want to scream after the 50,000th person asks me that! Ugh... is it really so bad that I don't have a boyfriend? Well, to be honest some days it is and some days it isn't. I just wonder sometimes what being in a serious relationship would be like. Maybe one day I will find out. I'll be posting sometime after I get back to let you know how I survived this years reunion and all the endless questions! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 23,July,2004 | I promised my nieces that I would take them to the movies today. We are off to see urlLink Catwoman kick some butt. Correct me if I am wrong here, but wasn't Catwoman's real name Selena Kyle? In the movie summary it says that her name is Patience Philips. Who knows. I guess I thought it was based on the comic book character. Maybe not. We shall see how the movie is in a few hours and I'll let you know my honest opinion. :-) Stayed tuned!! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 22,July,2004 | Well, my friends, I am happy to report that the Tater/Tator war is now over. In case you didn't know about this let me fill you in... Jimmy Lewis and I have has this war for several years now about how to correctly spell tater. He has always said that the correct way to spell it is tatOR to which I argued, no, it's tatER. Well, today, with the help of my niece Rachel we have proven him WRONG! Oh yes, Jimmy Lewis was WRONG!! Check out this website for the best urlLink tatER tots in the world! You can also check the correct spelling of tatER urlLink HERE . So, as sad as it may be, the war is finally over and I WON!!!! WOO HOO!!!! GIRLS RULE!!!! Don't be sad though Jim, I'll buy you some tatER tots to cheer you up! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 16,July,2004 | I am really glad that today is Friday. This has been a really long week for me. I am not even sure why but it has just dragged by. I don't really have much planned this weekend. Tonight I will probably go to the Reds game with my nephews and tomorrow I have a baby shower to go to. It amazes me all this cool stuff they have out for babies now. Cool swings, cool toys and even cool baby beds. No wonder kids are so spoiled today...they have too much cool stuff the minute they are born. I am jealous. I want to be a baby again so I can enjoy all that cool stuff! LOL Well, I have some transcription to finish up now so I think I will stop my endless rambling now. If anything exciting happens you all will be the first to know. Happy Friday! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 13,July,2004 | I am in a silly mood today. Perhaps it is because of the lack of sleep I received last night, but who knows! Is it just me or does the lead singer of Mercy Me look like our good buddy Jimmy? Take a look for yourself! Guy from urlLink MERCY ME AND Our buddy urlLink JIMMY LEWIS So.. what do you think? Leave your comments! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 10,July,2004 | I don't know if any of you have heard the song 'Jesus Walks' by Kanye West but I have to say that I am really liking it. Thought I would post some of the lyrics here... (Jesus Walks) God show me the way because the Devil trying to break me down (Jesus Walks with me) The only thing that I pray is that me feet don't fail me now (Jesus Walks) And I don't think there is nothing I can do now to right my wrongs (Jesus Walks with me) I want to talk to God but I'm afraid because we ain't spoke in so long And one of my favorite lines in the song is this: The way Kathie Lee needed Regis that's the way I need Jesus! So, remember today...We ALL need Jesus to walk with us! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 10,July,2004 | Well, I have been thinking a lot lately about my single status and I have decided that I really don't like it anymore. I just want to know what it feels like to be in love with someone of the opposite sex. I know what you are thinking, how sad is it that a 25-year old has never been in love, but yes, it is true. Sometimes I am content with my single life and then other times I really want to experience the dating life too and maybe even marriage. I know that God has a purpose for my life and if He chooses for me to be single then so be it, but if He wants me to meet someone and enjoy the dating life there will be no complaints from me. :-) So, any single guys out there, I am taking applications for the perfect date. haha Feel free to email me your application. |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 02,July,2004 | Okay, okay, I know, I suck at this. I have been really bad lately about posting but I promise I will update again soon. STAY TUNED!! |
3,137,696 | female | 25 | indUnk | Aquarius | 04,August,2004 | I know that I have been bad about posting lately but I thought I would finally update you about everything that has been going on. Well, actually this years family reunion wasn't too bad. I didn't even get asked the famous question this year...what a shock but you won't hear me complaining. I guess my family finally figured out how pathetic I am year after year and didn't want to waste their time or breath anymore by asking me if I had a boyfriend yet. Oh well. Such is life... but they did notice that I had lost 20 pounds! Woo hoo!! I am on the job hunt again. I have not been getting much work with the transcription stuff anymore so I am putting in some applications at various places. I think I am gonna stick with child care since that seems to be the only thing I am good at. I am just at this place right now in my life where I am trying to figure out lots of stuff. I know that I need a job and I need to really save up for a place of my own. I love my family, don't get me wrong, but there comes a time when we all need to be on our own. I am ready for that now. My parents are getting older, which scares me to death, and I know they won't be around forever. I really don't even like to think about that though.... I don't even know what I would do without them, especially my Mom, she is my best friend and the ONLY person, besides God, that I can go to and talk to about anything. Okay, enough rambling now... I'll post more soon... |
4,057,094 | female | 16 | Student | Virgo | 30,July,2004 | Hello, hello, hello, hellooooooooooo...just kidding. Hi! Lol, ok I'll stop with the hello's now. **Sigh** Today was a bit tiring for me. I woke up at 7 and then fell asleep and woke up again at 9. I showered and then got ready. I went to my mom's friend's house to help them bring a couch to where they live. After that I went to some moving truck place. I guess it's almost like 'U-Haul' but it's called 'Penske', well yeah I went there to go drop off a truck because my cousin and her boyfriend and kids came from North Carolina to visit or something, I don't know but they brought a moving truck with all there stuff and everything, so yeah. Then we went to Lotaburger and came home and ate. Then my cousin and her boyfriend left to get an oil change for their Caddy or Cadillac. And I stayed home and watched the kids. But it kinda sucked because my allergies started acting up and it started around 12 and it went all down hill from there. I took some allergy pills. It said Day-Time Allergy Relief or something like that. So I thought it wasn't supposed to make you drowsy but I guess it did...or well it made me. I was watching Shrek with my little cousin and I kept falling asleep. I kept thinking her mom would walk in the door any second. But my allergies went away. So that was nice. Then I went outside to play with my cousins and came back in because mosquitos were starting to bite me. I guess I'm just juicy...just kidding..haha. Anyways, I watched a little bit of Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune... Around 7 my cousins left to go see my other relatives. Baby-sitting was alright. The kids weren't bad...they listened and I got payed $20, so that was good. Yup. Matt called me earlier this evening...at like 9:45...well I guess at night..lol but something was wrong with him because he sounded a bit down. He wouldn't tell me why. I don't know but it's weird talking to him, because like he always says things to me and I start thinking he likes me..which he probably doesn't. Oh geez..it's sooo confusing. Why are guys confusing? But he would say stuff like....fine..and I would say fine...and he says...yeah I know you are....and I could tell by what he means...I mean it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out. Or he would say, something like...yeah really?...and I say yeah...really..and he'll say..wow you're really pretty..and then he'll say something else real fast..to cover it up. It's like he doesn't come out saying it...but he does it all secretly...it's tough to explain...but I hope you're getting me. And then I'm supposed to be getting a call from my friend but I don't know what's up with her. She and her ex-boyfriend are talking again and I kinda get the feeling like they're going to get back together, even though she says she won't. Because he treats her like crap and she knows it....it just bothers me a lot though. Well I guess I better get going now...Bye! |
4,057,094 | female | 16 | Student | Virgo | 28,July,2004 | Well hello everyone. Today is going alright for me. I woke up at 6:30 because my back started hurting...I swear, I think I'm an old lady. I did my usual thing. This time no call from my friend, Matt, the one I told you about yesterday. Anyways, I took a shower....cleaned the house....did the laundry, woke up my sister and told her to go in the shower...and called my mom to see who had called me earlier. That's pretty much it. Yesterday my mom nearly killed herself with the lawn mower. She was outside mowing the lawn and then it started to rain. Did that stop her? Nooooo...she kept on mowing. Then it started to thunder...and you could tell the lightning was near, did that stop her? Nooo....she kept on mowing until she was done. I swear she is stubborn. I just hope I don't become as stubborn or nearly as stubborn as she is. Then this morning I found out that one of my mom's cousin's or relatives died this morning. I knew who he was but I like didn't know him enough to were I would be weary and all down the whole day. I mean don't get me wrong...I am sad that had happend. I jsut hope my momma will be okay. I guess since that happend I have to go out of town this weekend and I really don't want to. If I do, then I want to tell my mom that I want to see my dad. Now that's another story. You see what happend was that my dad had left us when I was in the 8th grade..which was almost 3 years ago. He had been cheating on my mom with her best friend...and ugh..everything was just chaos. I mean..that was my mom's best friend. When my mom had found out that my dad had been cheating on her..she went to her friend...but my mom never he was with her friend..she alwasys thought it was someone else...but then she found out...Boy was she mad. I was pretty upset too. But I was soo close to my dad...we were like best friends..then all of a sudden he just leaves. But yeah...I haven't seen him since the week after Valentines Day this year. Oh yeah and another thing, my mom found out about this whole cheating thing like 2 days after Valentines Day. That kinda sucks. Well I guess I better get going now...sorry for the whole story..there's much more to it...leave a comment or something if you want to know more. Later! |
4,057,094 | female | 16 | Student | Virgo | 27,July,2004 | Hey guys! I hope everyone's day is going good. Let's see...today I didn't really do anything. I woke up a little before 7:00 am because one my friends called me. I have no idea why. He just did. He seems to always be doing that kind of stuff. Sometimes I wonder if he likes me...but then again I think he doesn't because he has a girlfriend. I would ask him but I don't want to look like an idiot when he tells me he doesn't. Plus I don't want to feel this awkwardness between us when we talk. So I just don't know what to do. The reason I think those things because he calls me very late at night and really early in the morning...and I'm the only one he does that too. Plus he told me awhile back that he liked me...nothing escalated from that. And then he told me that I was pretty on the phone this morning...I just keep thinking that maybe he's delusional or verrry tired when he's saying these things. Oh well....anyways, after that I listened to music and then sat there doing nothing. So I went back to sleep and then I woke up around 12. I watched the news...and watched a movie...then I got ready...and then I went and watched some more t.v. Then I made dinner and went to my room and texted my friend. All of a sudden I got the urge to check my email...so I did and to my surprise I got an email from someone! Woohoo! Just kidding. Well anyways...after that...I decided to do this. So here I am. Well I guess I better get going...talk to you all later! |
3,868,635 | female | 17 | Student | Pisces | 19,July,2004 | Oh my fucking god. Sorry about the language...but what the fuck is going on?! I'm so confused now. For the past two weeks, people have generally been shunning me. Friday night, I finally went out with Rox and Graeme. I found out that Laurie was supposedly the one who has lately not been able to stand me. Apparently she was telling everyone to basically not invite me. Well, I get home tonight, and guess who calls! So...is it really her and she was just bored tonight? Or is it someone else? What the fuck...I don't know who to talk to and who to believe anymore. It's so fucked up. Oh well, Julia gets home tomorrow, hopefully that will help to level me out a little bit. |
3,868,635 | female | 17 | Student | Pisces | 16,July,2004 | I suppose my self esteem issues that I used to think that I deal with must not have been as greatly terrible as I had previous thought. If they were, then I probably wouldn't feel so much of a just popped balloon. This past week, I've been flying around like crazy, happy and confident one moment, and lonely and worthless the next. Now, my balloon has landed, deflated and limp on the dirty floor. I guess it has been poked at countless times over the past few years, but now they've all put their strength together, picked up the big needle and with one big prod, have managed to conquer. Right before I leave, I'm sure that we'll have a party or some type of meaningless gathering of the sort where I'll be able to mask what's really going on with drugs and alcohol and I'll feel a little better, but that's not until the last moment, and not before then because then perhaps some people's consciences may nag at them for not doing anything again until that last moment. At least then I'll be however many miles away from it all. They'll be able to form better excuses than 'oh, I thought that you were busy.' Everyone knows that that excuse is the ultimate bullshit. You had no intention of contacting them, and then you say that with the 50% chance that you'll be right. I am not stupid, I've been on the other side of this for a long time. I suppose Karma has just flipped the tables. What I don't understand is how come just me? Things couldn't be better for everyone else. They're always busy, if not working or with their boyfriends or families, then each other. Me? Well, I tried to go out with Mom, that consisted in looking for stuff that she needed until she got tired. The one night that I got invited out with everyone, they all knew that that was the one night that I had already had plans. It must be bad though, because forever now they'd cleared tonight to try to have a party somewhere. I managed to get the house to myself until midnight or so, with my parents out who don't' mind drinking that much anyways. I'm not going to kid myself, that's all that they wanted to do anyways. They wouldn't even accept that, rather, they didn't acknowledge it and just went off and made their own plans. I suppose they've got something planned for tomorrow night, and Sunday, I'll get home with an email in my inbox from last night at 8pm saying, 'Hey Katie! Wow, it's been sooo long! We miss you! That's why you HAVE to come to > and we'll party! I hope that you haven't left for your aunt's cottage yet, Love, so and so.' Ya, bullshit. At 8pm on Saturday night I hadn't yet left for a cottage that I was going to for the weekend. I'd be willing to bet that's what will happen. Unless word doesn't spread that I'm actually going, and then I'll get a call on Sunday night when everyone else gets home from work saying 'Well, it's too bad you work on Sundays because we would have loved your company at the party last night.' Didn't stop anyone else! But then again, according to everyone, I don't' actually work anyways. I feel like I'm in some type of Stepford Friends situation. I just don't understand it all. But I suppose I did have it coming. I've had it coming for awhile, and I guess I've dodged it for long enough. Although I'm still pissed off that it was not always at all just me who didn't' want other's to go and I'm being punished. Holy Fuck, I'm selfish. Not that I have anyone else in life to care about. Every one seems so fake and superficial. I just want to know why. Why now? What happened? There are several other times where I could justify all of this, but why now? Oh well, I suppose there's really only 2 more weeks of this. After that, sure I'll be home for another week, but if I really get bored, I'll pay $20 and leave the city and go to MY apartment. Well, mine and Julia's. Only 2 more weeks.... |
3,868,635 | female | 17 | Student | Pisces | 10,July,2004 | 40 hours I've worked this week. And people say that I don't have a real job... So anyways, I spent my day in the office. Nothing terribly exciting came of that of course, I got alot done, people were in good moods. It was good considering... I tried to not think too much about friends, family, school etc...It just can get to be too much. Tonight Uncle Mur brought Mike, Dad and I out. That was quite enjoyable, I had a fun evening. It's been awhile since I've enjoyed myself like that-doing something I mean. |
3,868,635 | female | 17 | Student | Pisces | 09,July,2004 | Ok, so tonight was girls night. While everyone chattered about whatever mindless thought popped into their heads, I found myself wondering when that moment was, when was that moment that we all began maturing at different rates, our personalities spiraling off in oppisite directions? It's not that I didn't enjoy myself, but can I honestly still call them my best friends? Who in the past could I have really called my best friends. Two people spring to mind, and interestingly enough both friendships were destroyed by relationships-one being engaged by both parties of the friendship, and one due to an outsider edging in. I find myself missing both, but particuarly one more than the other. We have grown up together, knowing each other since we were 2. For awhile, I felt myself compelled to talk to her about issues, she seemed the most level with me. Especially for more worldly issues. She didn't mark me as strange when I would call at any random time and begin babbling on about some random conspiracy that I have just discovered, so my newest evidence that the wolrd will be ending soon. In fact, these phone calls were even reciprocated. We could talk about our lives, and the lives that we live. It never seemed to end, and while conversations with others would tend to follow down that never ending path, it would usually turn into a monotone drone on and on about the same old things. That, or into gossip about so and so. I hate when friendships reduce to that. The feeling that it is so necessary to have a conversation with someone that it isn't real, it's instead all about so and so. I want so and so out of my life. They have plagued it for too long. I want conversations to regain meaning. Why don't I feel anything anymore? When was the last time that I did? On my walk home this evening, i realized that I may appear as if I am becoming depressed again. But I don't feel depressed...should I? I just feel as if something is missing, that I'm lacking something that used to be there. Things just don't click when we're together anymore. I just really want someone that I can talk to and have a connection with. Just someone that I can discover. I want to connect with another human-it's been so long since I have. I realize that this is becoming repetitive, but I don't care. I suppose I figure that if I talk it out, perhaps things will become more clear. In fact, I am really glad that I have started this. Writing in my diary has just gotten depressing as before, I found myself writing it to someone. Someone that I could count on to always be there to invade my privacy. But I didn't mind, he knew me better than anyone, and I knew him. The bond that we share is inexplicable...who knows where it originated, and while we can deny, I am starting to realize that it will always be there. It's just a strange connection on who knows what level. I don't know if I have ever felt as at ease to tell anyone some of the stuff that I've told him. On top of all that, right before our friendship depleted due to the new coming relationship type thing, he experienced a whole side of me that no other has. I was able to express myself as a physical being and not only emotional. Now when I look back on it, I feel silly that he knows more about me than any other, and he is just another face in the hallway. I think that I have come to terms with it though, I just wish that I had someone new that I felt that comfortable with. If I could be anywhere right now, I'd be lying on a grassy hill, looking up at the stars with the company of a human. I wouldn't care who, but just someone that I wouldn't feel compelled to talk to. Just another human beside me. Someone to cure my chronic loneliness. That's what I love about cities, crowds, just anywhere with people is the energy from other humans. I sometimes wish that I could stand in the middle of a crowd, invisibly and just take it in. I had always vowed to not get hooked on drugs or alcohol because it is an escape, but that's what is happening. Days without having a joint or two are becoming nearly unbearable. Or just a shot or two. Anything to take a little of the responsibility off of me of having to behave. Behave in no matter what maner, it woulnd't matter. It's too hard to figure out how I should act...how do you know what to do or say? They help you decide, help you not care. Prom was amazing for that reason. I left inhabitions behind and just allowed myself to be taken over. As a result, I thouroughly enjoyed myself. I got to live my life as someone else. It was like watching a movie but I got to experience. For once I was the star that got to dress up, say those witty lines at the cheesiest of moments, throw caution in the wind and do as I wished. It was the perfect oppurtunity and I got to write the script. I didn't second guess a thing, I just acted impulsivly and it was the most amazing relieved feeling in the world. Same sort of with the cottage, when I felt that I could not tollerate a situation, I had a beer or a rum and coke. I got relaxed. Although I'm disapointed that I did have that heroine with the weed, I don't regret it. I didn't feel as if I was out of control, my mind just-well I felt good. That felt good. I was relaxed. That's what cottages are for though, right? I would like to know though the reason why my working is inferior to everyone elses. I put up with the same stuff, I worked just as much this week as everyone else. So what? I get paid a little more. That's just in the description of my position. I didn't apply for a minimum wage mcjob. Why can't I express my feelings towards work along with everyone else when they are? Some things just drive me up the wall. Oh well, this was just another day in my life. I think that I will now retreat to my bed and relax. Tell myself a bedtime story about what *may* happen in the future. Afterall, a girl must do what she has to to keep her head above water, n'est-ce pas? Farewell for this evening... |
3,868,635 | female | 17 | Student | Pisces | 08,July,2004 | Perhaps I am bipolar, perhaps the world around me is, but my mood has done a 580° since last night. I've been there and back again. Nothing was resolved, but I am ignoring things, therefore so are others. It's a nice little cycle, which just defines to me more and more the reasons for myexcitementt about moving. So, today I opened the mailbox and found 2 items pour moi (it's actually ironic that I say that in french). The first envelop was from Philemon containing my report card (46% last term in french; hence the irony.) and the second was from Dawson-finally. That made me feel better. THen I babysat. That was ok...but I am so over-exhausted for no particular reason. It's emotional I suppose. But anyways, I got home and had a long chat with Ash, which was nice because it's been a long time. I guess they got over whatever they had against me last weekend. We tried to start organizing a camping trip. Im still having mixed emotions about the Cottage. It was fun, but for some reason I can't fully get that sorted out in my mind. I just wish that I had a boyfriend. I realize that that last statement has consumed my thoughts over the past what-5 years? It's just I suppose the reasurance that I can count on that best friend to be there for me when I need them, and that they'll come to me when they need someone. I realize that it's selfish, but wouldn't it be nice to have someone specifically special to you, and to whom you are specifically special? I guess it's just easier to say that I want a boyfriend rather than I want a best friend. It's more conventional at least. But also, for some reason I find it much easier to talk to guys than girls. I suppose because they are more easy going, and they judge me as a girl in general as opposed to girls who think 'she's so strange and most definatly NOT friend-worthy...let's not talk to her around certain people so that they don't know that I'm friends with her'. This is not to say that I haven't experienced guys doing this either. Actually, I'm going to go off onto that for a bit. So, I was finishing Generation X last night, and I can identify SO much with Claire. She talks about Tobias in a way that my thoughts are decoded and written out. The way that she knows that she has an obsession and comes to terms with the fact that she can't deny it. The way that while he can be such a jerk to her, she still longs for him. The way that she really is interested mainly for physical reasons. After 2 1/2 years of well everything good and bad, I sit her some days and still think about those summer days, 'studying'. Which is I guess why I find myself in the situation that plagues me now. My thoughts are bombarded with short stories that I think up in my head, involving me and others-other specifically- to help me not think about those times, days, moments where bliss was acheived. It is much easier than trying to remind myself of the bad days, they just make me upset. It is easier to defer thoughts with the silent longing hope that one day these short stories may become true because in my world they are realistic. My world...what world is that? Does everyone have their own world, or am I the only one with such a large misconception of day to day activity. For everyone else's sakes, I hope that they have their own worlds. The universal one is awfully boring. I would go crazy without an imagination, but is that just because I am more of a creative type? Inspiration is the key though. You can't shut off that universal world, as much as we sometimes wish to. Everything around us, no matter how 'out there' it may seem was someone inspired and influenced by the universal society that we live in. Have you ever had a friend that was like a tv? Well, I admit it, I am friends with a TV. I mean, how am I not? Have you ever tried converse with a television? Chances are, you'd find our voice getting lost, bouncing back at you. You are bombarded with images, stories, annectdotes and the most useless infomericals...despite what you say. I was going to try to come up with an example conversation, and while I could just copy and paste an msn conversation to perfectly illustrate my point, I have decided to leave the fragments of anonymity that may still be left and end this statement like this. I think that this is a good time to publish a disclaimer: What I write here is not in the intent to bad talk someone, to hurt them, to downplay my relationships with anyone or whatever other feeling that could come from it. Rather, it is an outlet for what is going on inside of me so that I don't turn around and hurt others. I feel like a can of beer being shaken and shaken and shaken until it is about to explode, and this is just allowing the can to be opened a little to release some of the built up pressure. If every someone were to stumble across this and were affected, insulted or even just mentioned, then well-I'm not sorry that I said it. At the moment,this is how I feel. I'm not going to hide it. But these are feelings harbouring inside of me. Isn't it better that I release this here? Would you really rather that we release this to our mutual friends so that perhaps they develop similar feelings? or to you directly so that you can be hurt? If I have made peace with my friendships, then why bother disrupt them? I am friends with who I am for specific reasons. Every single person that I care for as some redeeming quality that makes them special to me, and of course, there is some specific thing that really really just bugs the hell out of me about that. But that's life, right? And next time that you ever have the urge to get mad at someone because they pointed out one of your flaws-stop and think. Have you ever said or even thought someone not so nice about them? Chances are pretty good that you have. So just shut the fuck up and stop being so goddamn hippocritical all of the time. It's not money, or religion, or language which cause so many rifts in our world, it's hipocrasy. If we'd all sit back and reflect for a second, I think that we'd all realize that this is pointless. Why bother act so stupidly all of the time. Actions have consequences, so think before you act. Goodnight. |
3,868,635 | female | 17 | Student | Pisces | 07,July,2004 | Well...This is my first post. I'm not writing this in the intent to necessarily be read...But it's more so for myself. I've found myself with a lack of outlet for my creativity, thoughts and just my overall me-ness. I am not so much accepted as who I am, not that I truly know who that is. I am starting to get a much clearer view, but it's still not set. I don't even know what to think anymore? It's strange, why have I not been invited anywhere lately? Perhaps it is due to the events on Canada Day...not that I really know what those said events were. Or perhaps it's that I'm so openly eager to escape-leave this place behind. My life is finally beginning to begin though. I had never really expected to be moving out at 17. The thought of leaving my family, friends, and comfort zone in this suburbia behind-all for a big city, bursting with culture and who knows what else. One thing for sure is that it will not be the small town of 35,000 where I'll be attending a school of 600, 150 in my grade that I have known since kindergarten. Instead I'll be attending a college along with 6,000 other strangers. This being said, I'm not upset that I'm leaving. As a matter of fact, as I mentioned it's the complete opposite. I truly am eager; anxious. I love my family and friends to death-most of the time. When things are good, they're great...unfortunatly, there's the flipside to be taken into account. When things get rough, it's unbearable. Pettiness always seeps through into the relationships like an overbearing gas, suffocating us all. We go about blindly, not analyzing consequences. Honestly, as terrible as it is, I just wish that I had a relationship-one that could be BOTH physical and emotional. Why does it always seem to be one or the other? To be fair though, this is largely my fault. Why do I always target guys that I could see possibly taking interest in me and try to be myself-well the part of myself that I find to be socially acceptable, pull them in, and then lose interest. Twice this year I have done this, and both times were terrible. Both saw me at my very worst moments, and still stuck around until I just ignored them for long enough. Why am I always so terrible like that. One helped me see through a messy 'breakup' of sorts, and the other through a miserable, sickening bus ride. Even after my attempts to show how I was too busy for a relationship afterwards, they stuck around. I always just dismiss the genuine guys. And here I am, sitting at my computer at 10:54 on a warm, summer Wednesday evening, lusting after this guy. This guy that I know, but don't really know. We've talked, hung out-always using school as an excuse, but he's never really shown any particular interest in me. Afterall, he does like someone else. Oh well, Prom was enough for me...or so I thought. It just really left me wanting more. Although, truthfully it has given me a little strength to not fall back into the oh so familiar rut that plagued 2 1/2 years of my life. That is most definitely NOT somewhere that I'd like to end up at again. So here I am, talking for the most part about my messy 'love' history. Really, I suppose I should really re-evaluate when I say that I have no experience in this field. But how can I now deferenciate facts from fiction...what really happened, and what memories are fabricated? I suppose that this whole blog will just become one jumbled fiction and non-fiction, distorted photograph of my life. Photography. Why can I not keep it up? I really wish that I had pursued it...it's the one thing that I have been most passionate about in my entire life. I suppose film follows down that trail, but its not black and white stills. If only I could afford to keep it up, but truthfully at this point, I am just hoping that I can afford to feed myself from month to month. And at this rate, that will be an expensive task. Why is it that food is beginning to control my life. To ease my concerns, I tell myself that it doesn't look like I'm gaining weight, and if I drink more water, it will just flush out the excess fat. It's not. I'm just now drinking water compulsively. When I don't have a glass in my hand, my mouth goes dry and I start to think about all of the dirty, jiggle fat sticking to my insides and I can't focus on anything but getting another big glass to flush it all out. Why can't water just flush all of the bad out?! Why is it not working? How long will it take until I can commit myself to a regime that works? At this rate, I am stuck in this perpetual spiral of hopelessness. Well, I must go and refill my glass of water, as I'm beginning to become uncertain once again whether it's half empty or half full-lusting after that which I'll never have... Adieu. |
3,789,909 | male | 23 | Technology | Virgo | 29,June,2004 | Or so I am going to convince myself of this. I highly doubt anyone will actually read this, and if you do, I must question why? I mean, do you not have anything better to do than to surf around and read peoples thoughts that they put on the internet? Of course, I must question why I am even doing this. Let's just say it's an experiment. An experiment in how long I actually post here, and what I post. Don't expect me to come and lay all my sad, teary-eyed stories of failed loves and hardships in life. I can never understand why people do that. You are putting yourself up for an uncaring, unknown audience. Heck, that's even worse than acting in a movie. Someone could come up and tell you that you did a bad job in a movie, but any anonymous moron could say that your blog is a pile. Ah well, enough ranting for now. |
3,789,909 | male | 23 | Technology | Virgo | 14,July,2004 | Post number 3! \/\/007! I've been looking at others' blog and it still amazes me as to how they can post all their sad crap. No one gives a damn! You are not that important that someone want to read about how you cut yourself. In fact, others are laughing at you behind their computer screens. Ah well. As long as I never meet one of these freaks. I may explode into a violent fury and give them to really whine about. Of course, I really can't say much. I'm about to lay some stuff down myself. I've been listening to a lot of Celtic influenced music lately. Why I don't know. Must be because I can't find anything else that sounds decent. A new little thing I'm going to start doing. Recommended reads. Books and comics that I thing other may like and why they may. Today's is V for Vendetta , a comic written by Alan Moore and drawn by David Lloyd. A very interesting comic set in a facsist England where a 'hero' named V begins to cause trouble. To say much more would be to ruin the story. You can pick this up at most comic shops as a trade paperback. Do so. NOW! Oh, the Rolling Stones still suck. Just thought I would throw that out there. |
3,789,909 | male | 23 | Technology | Virgo | 03,July,2004 | That blasted Rolling Stones song. Well, okay, many of the Stones tunes grate on my ears, but this is that one from the new C2 commercials. You can't get always get what you want. No, really? Why I never knew that, thank you Mick Jagger and Mumbles! You have enlightented me! I now see the light! Idiots. I never have liked the Stones. They've always seemed like a Beatles ripoff. Oh well. |
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