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wsb_reddit_v001

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[INST] My man. [/INST] So ugly you need to be wasted to get it up. Just attractive enough that the amount of wasted you need to be is still below the threshold for whiskey dick. It's running a fine line sometimes.
[INST] K, you sit around praying for the Bern, bro. [/INST] Here's 7 reasons how bernie can still win
[INST] yeah i always get fucked by slippage or not having enough money to close my damn position [/INST] Why close? Just let em expire
[INST] Do your parents know that you are autistic? [/INST] Probably. My ex was fairly convinced I was at least asperger's.
[INST] Not enough meat. [/INST] Too many fucking sweet potatoes
[INST] Which movie is this from? [/INST] Boiler Room
[INST] You’re essentially overpaying for leverage is what it boils down to [/INST] I take it spreads would be a better move then instead of just buying one leg
[INST] I’d like to see it hit 40 dollars and absolute euphoria here before it crashes back to 25 overnight. Memes will rise from the ashes. [/INST] Lol. Iq is solid long term. I’ve been selling puts to get in at 25... really waiting on a stronger option chain tho.
[INST] That's the life. [/INST] At least it would be if anyone ever won.
[INST] water is ok coffee and broth no [/INST] What about caffeine pills?
[INST] meh, people will cling to any semblance of popularity. even a gifmaker on wallstreetbets has groupies lmao [/INST] My mom said I would never amount to anything.
[INST] A sip [/INST] Better do 2 beers, just to be safe
[INST] ironic [/INST] Iconic
[INST] Okay. In on calls. [/INST] Watch it move sideways
[INST] Hey, JagsAndNeo, just a quick heads-up: **jist** is actually spelled **gist**. You can remember it by **begins with g-**. Have a nice day! ^^^^The ^^^^parent ^^^^commenter ^^^^can ^^^^reply ^^^^with ^^^^'delete' ^^^^to ^^^^delete ^^^^this ^^^^comment. [/INST] gif
[INST] This went way over everyone's head. Rarely if ever are bottoms timed perfectly, so the question is how much are you willing to lose before you make? [/INST] I lost 80% on my naked $FB calls before coming out with +140% return and am looking for my next autism fueled adrenaline ride so I’m in.
[INST] Overweight means putting more weight on it in your Portfolio (than the benchmark for example) So Analysts expect greater returns for that stock [/INST] Wait, next your gonna tell me that my retirement shouldn't be 80% AMZN
[INST] Can't stop won't stop [/INST] Roc-A-Fella Records
[INST] Little overboard with that level of DD [/INST] i'd rather be too thorough than be careless!!!11!!
[INST] Oh my god. It’s like a flashback to the first time I opened a brokerage account in 2013. I literally made a spreadsheet and found that if I just averaged 2% a week I’d be retired by now. I’m not retired, yet. Though I’m certainly a great deal better off than I was. [/INST] Now the question is, did you stick to that plan or did you YOLO your account away?
[INST] Fantastic. I was assigned 500 shares at the dip, and its at 14.40ish currently. My calls will get assigned, and i lock in a nice profit. [/INST] It hasn't dipped over the last 2 months though... Straight up basicslly, hmm
[INST] Snap 12$ CALLs [/INST] Date / strike?
[INST] LOL PM/Altria survived in the past with much more strict regulations from FDA. And they will continue to do so.. \(Hint: LOBBYING\) [/INST] Also, they are good at making the most addictive substance in the world even more addictive. The business model hasn't ever been beat.
[INST] You're supposed to read that line in a sarcastic voice. This is my first attempt at a shitty yolo idea cut me some slack [/INST] Cigarettes are a horrible choice to invest in, they can't even do any marketing. # of addicts has been steadily declining.
[INST] Well, they aren't wasting money on pointless lights and electricity. [/INST] They're still wasting 60% on pointless lights and electricity
[INST] Theres got to be at least one black guy in this subreddit to rap it [/INST] I just did... This is fucking fire lmao Perfect flow
[INST] Usually the ideas I read here are nice in theory but dumb in execution, this is also dumb in theory [/INST] Swaps on $1,100 accounts made up of FD's. Jesus
[INST] they're gonna switch to Powershell commands [/INST] noooooooooo
[INST] And that is the story of the HS kingpin in every hs [/INST] The way she goes
[INST] Fuck! I logarithimed the extrapolation plot. [/INST] Classic mistake
[INST] Shoulda done that 1 month ago bro, missed the boat? [/INST] Yea just got into options this week....Definitely see some profit so if I die I’m going down with my ship
[INST] i too want a recap [/INST] See above
[INST] Here's 7 reasons how bernie can still win [/INST] Its not linking!
[INST] The fuck am I looking at here. [/INST] A live look at bears getting their anus primed for entry
[INST] I’d rather not own a Chinese made car. I get that my phone, Xbox, TV, and laptop are all made in China, but I don’t sit in those while going 80 mph down the highway. [/INST] You obviously haven't seen what these guys are capable of..? They fine tune high performance electric fuckin spaceships bro... Lol. Whut?
[INST] deep bro [/INST] We had the makings of a haiku in there somewhere.
[INST] Step two is actually to integrate it with RH, so I just click the button, and hope my daddy treats me right. Then I wont look at my account for a month. When I return, riches will be there, I presume. [/INST] >When I return, riches will be there, I presume. Now this is the kind of quality investing advice I come here for
[INST] Anyone planning for the deaths of Charles Munger and Warren Buffett. [/INST] If you can predict Warrens death you make a bunch of tendies
[INST] It's hard to guess which ones the board members would wanna fund though. [/INST] No, it's really not. There are only maybe 5 big-money games our right now...
[INST] They said the rest of the ear and 2019 would be “challenging”. That was interpreted as difficult or unlikely to be meet goals when really he was saying it would be difficult for other companies that weren’t as well positioned as AMAT. [/INST] So you're saying the guy in charge is retarded, pass.
[INST] How far otm is this? [/INST] Maybe around 400
[INST] With what I know currently I might as well take a trip to the casino. [/INST] no, that's dumb. don't go all the way to the casino. you can use robinhood from home.
[INST] This sounds smart. Should I do the opposite? [/INST] Doing the opposite sounds smart, now! Im confused!
[INST] You think it will hold 100? [/INST] Absolutely
[INST] Of course, theoretically there are only workers in society. What kind of person do you expect would be able to accept those kinds of conditions? Do you see any challenge in this situation that might lead to stratification? What are you going to find on the black market with these kinds of controls? Who would be trading on the black market and why? [/INST] I mean, people who don't work aren't workers
[INST] ATM = almost in the money? [/INST] Astronaut telepathic murder
[INST] He likes the safety of an index much like how he likes driving a nearly 2 ton vehicle. [/INST] just like how a stop loss prevents your portfolio from crashing, volvo's front end collision avoidance system prevents your ditzy wife from crashing into the back end of a parked school bus
[INST] Date / strike? [/INST] june 8th .15 each you can buy a truck load of them
[INST] Enphase. Initiating launch 3.2.1 [/INST] Emphase has a PE of like a billion
[INST] Nigga I'm not here trying to do algebra [/INST] That means he started with $250. Crazy, right?!
[INST] I got like 13 $55 strike puts and more.. Homey [/INST] It’s not going to go under 57 again so not sure how that strike makes money. Exp?
[INST] You are actually kind of funny [/INST] 'He cute'
[INST] If you've been here a while why don't you have $RAD [/INST] Yeah....I'm not gonna touch that thing even if it was the last stock on earth.
[INST] Aldi isn't public is it? I recently converted my household to Aldi exclusive and cut my groceries/homewares in half and get better food. I don't know what loyalty people give the likes of Kraft and mondelez [/INST] Mondelez manufactures shit food that missed the health craze middle to upper Americans are on. Nobody wants pop tarts, ketchup and crackers anymore. March, Same with Trader Joes for us.
[INST] This is, in fact, how you will make your fortunes. [/INST] options alpha and tasty trade more or less advocate the same strategy. Randomly pick stocks and just buy and sell spreads based on their iv rank
[INST] How will he recover from that one [/INST] Who? /u/haupt91 or /u/losingmoneyrightleft?
[INST] you can disable instant in your settings or something. Its honestly not worth doing. If you can't make money with 1 trade a week, doing three+ trades a day is not going to change anything. [/INST] It’ll help get to $0 3x as fast by my experience. Now that’s what I call triple leveraged.
[INST] Have you tried winning the lottery? [/INST] Not yet. Is that a good roi?
[INST] Pics [/INST] You want pics of a tranny??
[INST] Well people talk about hanging themselves here everyday. I learned that joking about it is a step towards actually doing it. Just want you guys to know you are loved. Don't do it. I am your friend. [/INST] /r/wholesomeWSB
[INST] I swear there's no bigger indication someone is economically illiterate than when they believe Tesla can possibly have an eps as any major automotive company [/INST] HAHA did you try and turn my own comment around on me while openly admitting you evaluate which tech/growth companies to invest in on a hindsight metric like EPS? That's amazing. Good for you. But seriously, put down that copy of Intelligent Investor and pick up something written in the past 20Y. /inb4 'TSLA is not a tech company!!'
[INST] Both are still shit. [/INST] I really like my BRZ. No it isn’t fast at all, but it’s an incredibly fun car to drive
[INST] Worth picking up 125’s in the morning or is it too late to yolo? [/INST] Seems like you missed the boat
[INST] You’d need to be a genius kind of autistic for this [/INST] So, rainman?
[INST] Yeah, for someone who opposed capitalism, he had no problem leeching off Engel's daddy's money. [/INST] Ironic how even Marx had to be subsidized by Captalist profits to survive.
[INST] I am too, bought in when it was 58 last month but it took a shit throughout June. I think it will come back though. [/INST] My DD. Toured the Woodford Reserve distillery the other week, was fantastic. Some article said their pension is fully funded. Lady I go to the gym with is having to work mandatory Saturday overtime at the cooperage, so they must be busy.
[INST] No. It’s just a pic showing distribution of analyst sentiment and how off base MS was [/INST] thanks
[INST] Works for me from a separate computer [/INST] yes because our different hardware is what causes the 404 error
[INST] Ah, so that doesn't make the capital tied up then I would think. New to options, just curious. [/INST] Smart thing to do is to sell once he has a profit. He bought 30x at $18.45, but it's going for $17.25 ish right now. Selling at a small profit would be a tough thing to do, especially since January is so far away. The 'what if I hold a little longer' will kick in.
[INST] Did you mistype June? [/INST] Usually after ER. They did that quite a lot in the past.
[INST] good time to take some profits now on TTD, though [/INST] not yet
[INST] I sold at 32, looking for re-entry around 28 but if it doesn't dip oh well. Profit is profit. Good luck! [/INST] It hit 28.
[INST] I like your style. [/INST] Thanks pop
[INST] bright side is entire family can file personal bankruptcy together, staying together in bad times. [/INST] Which is why I would never share my trades with my family.
[INST] Mark CUBAn. Got it, short to 0. [/INST] I wouldn't bet against the Cuban beat.
[INST] What happens when/if the go to 0? [/INST] Fucking hilarious that you don't know that yet still bought them. What a dipshit, you deserve to lose everything.
[INST] Holy shit ur dumb [/INST] Here ya go you fucking Autist. https://finance.yahoo.com/m/0d7ed0c4-dfcb-3e19-9b18-3bd1e679d008/hedge-fund-guru-israel.html?.tsrc=applewf
[INST] My head is inside the tiger’s mouth. I live for this shit. YOLO. [/INST] :\)
[INST] That's when the short squeeze is over I mean I think long term the company has potential a lot of 50+ PTs from analysts lately and also majorly cutting costs to increase revenue it will most likely see 50 this week sometime imo [/INST] Oh I understood that you meant the short squeeze would be over in 2 days. What makes you say it will be exactly 2 days though? It doesn't seem like there has been enough volume since 5/15 for all shorts to cover. On a side note, when does this get updated? [https://www.nasdaq.com/symbol/aaoi/short-interest](https://www.nasdaq.com/symbol/aaoi/short-interest)
[INST] Those little tards are this subs treasures. [/INST] True, watching them jerk each other off is interesting. Really gay though
[INST] Yeah, they don't pull scratch-offs from stores that have had people already hit the jackpots and the lower prize amounts that are still higher than what you can redeem at the store. So you might be buying tickets for a game that is no longer winnable. So check first online before choosing which games to play. They say that the lottery is a tax on the stupid but if stupidity has a good ROI then it just may be worth it. EDIT: Missed a sentence [/INST] I'm stupid and I pay taxes. Perhaps I'm eligible for such rewards
[INST] Its not a loss yet. He has hope. [/INST] Never sell. Never lose.
[INST] Yea but AMD is also up 64% in the last 2 months. [/INST] Which is more important to denegerate traders liks us in WSB
[INST] It's already around my neck [/INST] Don't kick the chair just yet
[INST] This market is spooky. Up 4.5% on some assholes opinion. [/INST] Why can't this shit happen to $MU right now? /s
[INST] even within a single week. i watched last week and laughed as it dropped from $64 to $57 [/INST] I know... This thread is pathetic. Disclaimer: I hold $10K MU
[INST] I have Puts 😉 [/INST] Just bought 14.5 and 13.5 6/15 here.
[INST] Maybe this is their charitable tax fudge for the whole year. [/INST] Definitely, and not a bad one at all tbh
[INST] 6/8 calls at 63 are ass fucked rn dood [/INST] 6/8 calls are fucked rn until we get a price target bump or overweight rating
[INST] Its up 3% PM fag. Buy those puts. [/INST] I don’t think you’re quite catching my drift. I’m long.. and would prefer the top meme stock status on wsb remained elsewhere. Ban bullish posts.
[INST] Maybe around 400 [/INST] so your saying theres a chance
[INST] Just two contracts @1.10 lol [/INST] If they go to $0 then you lose $220.
[INST] Looks like it's holding so far. Jesus I hope we limp in > $58 today. Might have a shot at holding. [/INST] Above $59 at the moment
[INST] I just checked this and you’re probably right. Rethinking my Tuesday now. I’d jump back in to LULU but I think it’s getting too high I don’t want to get burned going down. [/INST] I think we will see a significant pop going into legalization, shares could net you a decent gain. I'll probably sell before Thursday though.
[INST] I’m crying in the library [/INST] Same, this post cheered me up though
[INST] In your mental retardation like stupor you seem to be over looking one glaring fact. How many companies in the world produce clothing and denim and how many produce memory? [/INST] You don't need 20 different phones at any given time, but most people have at least 20 sets of clothing if not more.
[INST] If he is trading during his working hours, he is probably losing money overall. [/INST] I'm not day trading per se, but really planning and keeping up with the market to plan my move 10-15 minutes before market close. EDIT: and yes, I'm trading options, not stupid ass pussy stocks
[INST] Lmao I think I did exactly this. That was an earnings jump right? So dumb. [/INST] Yeah last summer I think. I sold because I thought that shit was way overvalued. Well...
[INST] State government hahaha [/INST] Same here hahahhaaha
[INST] 100% match up to 5% means a guaranteed 100% return each year on your contributions. Mine goes into a Roth too so the gains are tax free once taken out. It was a joke that it was only up 3% this year haha obviously that’s fucking awful [/INST] Isn't the S&P up a tiny bit less YTD? Seems like you beat the market.