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my first is in blood and also in battle, my second is in acorn, oak, and apple, my third and fourth are both the same, in the center of sorrow and twice in refrain, my fifth starts eternity ending here, my last is the first of last. oh dear!
barrel
where is there is no south, west, nor east, and weather not fit for man or beast
south pole
a man pushes his car around the corner and stops out the front of a motel. he then realises he is instantly bankrupt! why?
man was playing manoply
if i have 10 eggs in a basket, two fall out and one breaks. how many eggs are left?
7
2's company 3's a crowd was 4 and 5?
9
forever due to what is wrong, men rage if i be lost by theft; i am what justice works to bring, and all you have when nothings left
rights
what is the captains name?
wat
there was a london scholar walking along. he pulled off his gloves and drew of his head. what was that london scholars name? hint: the name was inside the sentence.
andrew andrew
a man is walking in the forest of the jabudaut tribe. the tribe hates trespassers. they caught the man and was going to punish him the same way as all the other trespassers. he was told to say a statement; if it was true, he would be shot to death, if it was false, he would be hung ( opinions are judged true or false by the tribe. the man amazingly did not die. he said a statement that was neither true nor false, confusing the tribe. what was the statement?
i will be hung
it is an arctic double breasted formal wear
snowsuit
my first is in some but not in all. my second in into but not in tall. my third in little but not in big. my fourth in pork but not in pig. my whole is made in nature? s way. for clothing, rugs used every day.
silk
when would a woman love a bald midget?
when he is her baby
I coolyoudown, i spin around quite fast. what am i?
im a fan
what do ants eat when they are sick?
antibiotic
why was the picture sent to jail?
because it was framed
I am neither a guest nor a trespasser in this place I belong that belongs to me where is it?
home
I am served at a table, in gatherings of two or four. served small, white and round. you'll love some, and that's part of the fun. what am i?
pingpong balls
what's a pigs best karate move?
pork chop
what did the mother be say to the baby bee?
beehive yourself
how much dirt is in a hole 3 feet wide and 4 feet deep?
none a hole is empty
sometimes i am light, sometimes i am dark. most people like me. what am i?
chocolate
what's the shortest way to mow a yard?
longest way
I go around in circles but always straight ahead, never complain no matter where I am led.
wagon wheel
what has teeth but doesnt bite.
come
whats black and white, black and white, black and white and green?
three penguins and a pickle
I have hands that wave at you, though i never say goodbye. it's cool for you to be with me, especially when i say, " hi. " what am i?
electric fan
I make obvious what you covered up. what am i?
highlighter
a farmer had a stone that he used to measure grain on his scale. one day his neighbor borrowed the stone, and when he returned, it was broken into four pieces. the neighbor was very apologetic, but the farmer thanked the neighbor for doing him a big favor. the farmer said that now he can measure his grain in one pound increments starting at one pound all the way to forty pounds ( 1, 2, 3, 17, 29, 37, etc. ) using these four stones. how much do the four stones weigh?
40 lbs
which area in our country is always attacked by bombs?
bombay
if a hog and a half is a dollar and a half how much are five hogs?
5
what goes up but never come down?
our age
sometimes i'm orange sometimes i'm white sometimes i'm red sometimes i'm light what am i?
moon
what does the second " w " in " www " stand for?
wide
I am yellow. you could put red stuff on me. who am i?
french fri
what does this mean? nobody love
nobody is above the law
I am not a girl's best friend though i am very close i can be good and start a new trend i am hard to find i am born in a mouth if your looking for me look toward the south
purl
as i was going to never i saw 3 men, each men had 2 wives, each wife had a sack, each sack had a cat, each cat had seven kittens. how many were going to govern?
1 me
when i'm used, i'm useless, once offered, soon rejected. in desperation oft expressed, the intended not protected. what am i?
poor alibi or excuse
bike and cane were found dead of natural causes. the only thing in the room was broken glass and water. there were no marks on the body's and they did not drown. there was no electricity in the room and it was ventilated how did they die
mike and june were fish
im black, white and red all over. what am i?
news paper
what can you put into a glass but can't take out?
water
what is long, but short, and looks like flowing milk?
milky way
jerry went to restaurants and order soup, as he got the soup it had a fly in it and asked the waiter to change it. he got it back and jerry complained that he didn't do anything because the fly was still there, but the waiter claim he did something different what did the waiter do.?
he added salt and pepper
adam accidentally knock a cup full of coffee down but the coffee did not scattered how can that be?
cofee bean
you are a bus driver. he / she goes to the first stop, pick up 24 people. second; 67 third; 97. how old is the bus driver?
however old you are
what did dracula send when he was invented to a hallowed bash?
fangyou note
the cost of making only the maker knows, valueless if bought, but sometimes traded. a poor man may give one as easily as a king. when one is broken pain and deceit are assured.
promise
if there is a yellow house on bluebird land, a green house on orange street, a pink house on kitten road, a black house on whitehouse pike and a purple house on firebird hill, where's the white house?
washington d c
I get bigger the more you take away from me. what am i?
hole get it stanley yelnats
I like funland it is so cool.
i like funland so cool
I am used to bat with, yet i never get a hit. i am near a ball, yet it is never thrown. what am i?
your eyelashes
cry baby you can take off all of my skin and I will not cry but you will why?
iam an onion
only one color, but not one size, stuck at the bottoms, yet easily flies. present in sun, but not in rain, doing no harm, and feeling no pain. what is it.
its a shadow
if you are a man then your best friend will eat this for dinner
dogfood
close to the words of life stay in, but i wither, Wayne, and dry. what am i?
biblepressed flower
I am not alive but i can die. what am i?
battery
what kind of fall that you might die from?
waterfall
why would a hair stylist rather cut the hair of two brunettes than one red head?
they would make more money
a man walks into a hardware store and sees the cost of a thing that he cannot work out what it is. it says you can buy 1 for 50p, 23 for ps1 and 267 for ps1. 50. what can it is the unknown item?
there door numbers
11 + 2 = 1 when will be the given sum true?
in watch
first time,'was the season, second reason,'was the weather, third excuse, i had to leave, for'was the end of time! what am it?
a tree
I am wise yet weird, i am heard but rarely seen. whenyousee meyour amazed. what am i?
im an owl
why did the chicken run across the football field?
referee called foul
ifyouwere in a building with no windows and allyouhad was piece of gold mirror and rock show wouldyouget out
use the door
101 - 102 = 1 make this statement true by shifting any one digit. no swapping, just move one digit.
still looking for the answer
a man is standing on a platform shooting birds. from the ground to the platform is 20 ft. from the man to the to the tip of the gun is 4 ft. how many feet is the man standing on?
2 feet
I go inside boots and outside shoes what am i?
ankles
what can be smart and dumb too, it is also very near you, it is weird and cool too, it can be feared and it needs no fuel, what am i?
brain
what can be broken without touching it?
promise
there is such an entity in the world that spends more time on the surface than any other. place is not a concern. what is this entity?
fzer0slipper proning
If man walks through a door, he ends up outside he looks up and sees a ceiling fan, the last thing he sees is a piano, so he ends up in prison, and decides to make a break from prison. ( mindyouhe is blind ( ( ifyouhavnt caught that yet ) ) ) he digs an 11 ft hole but doesn't make it out of prison through the hole. how did he get revenge on his killer?
i dont kno do you
how could all of your cousins have an aunt that isn't your aunt too?
their aunt is your mother
what was the presidents name in 1950?
goerge w bush
tall i am young, short i am old. with life i do glow, your breath is my foe. what am i?
candle is what i be
five men went into a church in the pouring rain. none of the men had an umbrella but one man did not get wet. how is that possible?
he was in the casket
a truck driver is going three blocks east a the wrong way. he is not breaking the law. how come?
because he is walking
which flower is not used in pooja?
cauliflower
what is it that karen had first, mark her last, Paul never had and lucky rocket lost when she married paper piper?
answer is k
before it. Everest was discovered as the highest mountain in the world, which mountain was the highest?
mt everest
Mary's father has five daughters. ( 1 ) nanny ( 2 ) nine ( 3 ) nine ( 4 ) none name the fifth one.
fifth daughter is mary
there is a light blob at the top floor of 3 starry houses and there are the swishes one is going to turn on the light and two do not with one is the one that turns on the light?
milled
there was a man walking in pouring rain without an umbrella. when he got home there wasnt a single hair on his head that was wet. how is that?
he was bald hah
what is a mummy's favorite kind of music?
rap
journey without it and you will never prevail, but if you have too much of it you will surely fail.
confidence
I am dead yet living still, death arrives on a window sill, I am there yet only one sees me, I am only one of many.
grim reaper
when you are a child you are forced to take them when you are an adult you want to take them
naps
how do cowboys ride streets?
with steering wheels
a man walks into his bathroom and shoots himself right between the eyes using a real gun with real bullets. he walks out alive, with no blood anywhere. and no, he didn't miss and isn't superman. how did he do this?
man is jesusgod
what is smaller than a sink but bigger than a cup, yet the Mississippi river wont fill it up?
strainer
I have a pet, his body is full of coins
piggy bank
what goes down, but never goes up?
gravity
what do vampires cross the sea in?
blood vessels
you have a bath and you need to empty it, you have a bucket and a cup, what do you do to empty it?
pull the plug out
there are two of these in a second, 1 of these in a week, and 1 in a year. what is it?
es
what has 13 hearts but no other organs?
pack of playing cards
if someone gets " collared ", what has happened to them?
arrested
what grows bigger the more you take from it?
hole in the ground
a man lives on the 10th floor of his apartment building. every day when he leaves for work he takes the elevator to the 1st floor. when he comes back from work he takes the elevator to the 7th floor and walks up the stairs the rest of the way to the 10th floor. why does he stop at the 7th floor on his way back home?
hes a midget
what is have a tale?
dress
what do you have when your head is hot, your feet are cold, and you see spots in front of your eyes?
polkdot sock on your head