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8,300 |
Well, the negativity left the room... was he right?
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8,301 |
First opinion: "Cut it off"\n\nFirst reaction: "Fuck YOU"
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8,302 |
Yeah, that's what I would've done, too.
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8,303 |
Considering they did zero actual mechanical work to these cars, you are probably right.
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8,304 |
I very rarely wait for a table. I have a perfect amount of fame... Not hassled, rarely wait. \n
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8,305 |
Staying at a friend's house, she has toddler and a cat. Both jumped on me at once. \n\nOne of them, I yelled at not to jump on people. \n\nThe other, I picked up and tossed away from the couch. \n\n\n... It's okay, those things are pretty durable.
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8,306 |
And 19 year sophomore. Is there some bad water in that town? they hooked up because they're the oldest people there. ( and possibly the dumbest.)
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8,307 |
"what do you want for christmas?" ;)
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8,308 |
My whole life I have frequented an acidic auto garage. Something I should know?
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|
8,309 |
Let's go invest in broke person stock now. \n\nEDIT: thatsthejoke.jpeg
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|
8,310 |
>Some people go decades having them without even knowing.\n\nFrom the bottom of my heart, I wish you had not said that.
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|
8,311 |
I fucking hate that commercial. I love animals but that was a terrible marketing move, to make people feel guilty and responsible for the suffering of animals.
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8,312 |
This is how i overhear some of the best gossip. Every once in a while, I won't have any music playing, but people assume I can't hear them because headphones.
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8,313 |
But he's part *man* so yeah, that is rare.
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|
8,314 |
True, but the woman's body Has ways of shutting that down.
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|
8,315 |
>"In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth." Genesis 1:1.
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|
8,316 |
Well, technically the arch still survived the earthquake.
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|
8,317 |
It had to be miserable for all of them, I hope she got help at some point :(
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|
8,318 |
/r/thingsjonsnowknows
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|
8,319 |
What a gentlemanly asshole. \n\nEdit: <insert obligatory top comment remark here>
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|
8,320 |
He's got beautiful form. Notice how his low his clearance is over the frenulum, and how his center of gravity barely moves. While the rest of the guys are cradling the balls he barely breaks his stroke. That efficiency allows him to jerk away from the sack with each tug. His girth helps, but his technique is also fantastic.
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|
8,321 |
They thought they could squeeze it into a human-sized box, but they were misteaken. That's just wishful shrinking.
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|
8,322 |
if he died holding your hand he doesn't blame you, and you shouldn't blame yourself. no matter how old you were at the time. accidents happen, clearly not your fault.
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|
8,323 |
Statistically, you have a much better chance of being murdered if someone else is in the house as well.
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|
8,324 |
According to many people on reddit, if anyone does anything, your girlfriend is cheating on you.
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|
8,325 |
Money will not buy happiness but giving it away to people who need it most seems to make my happy so I guess in a very twisted way money did buy me happiness.
|
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|
8,326 |
She was stuck in limbo
|
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|
8,327 |
I hate when someone mocks your laugh. Like screw it, last time I laugh at something with you asshole.
|
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|
8,328 |
Get off reddit, dad! I'm trying to hang out with my friends!
|
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|
8,329 |
I'm sorry but your great aunt is an idiot
|
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|
8,330 |
Guess what. You do and no one has told you that you don't because they're being polite.
|
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|
8,331 |
What's a foot long and slippery? \n\nA slipper.
|
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|
8,332 |
I want to make a shirt that says\n"GET ENRAGED AND THROW IT ON THE GROUND"
|
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|
8,333 |
"Daylight savings" bullshit they just sped the earth up 1 hour with that shit!
|
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|
8,334 |
Begun, the drone wars have.\n
|
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|
8,335 |
http://isdownforeveryoneorjustmedownforeveryoneorjustme.com/\n\n> downforeveryoneorjustme.com seems to be DOWN.
|
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|
8,336 |
Would you say that both of your jobs involve... hot... buns?
|
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|
8,337 |
This was my first thought, too. There is no bad day. It's raining? Darn, I'll just have to go wreck a set of tires with this here Ferrari.
|
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|
8,338 |
They're mostly rich white people. I mean have you ever seen a brother at a ski resort? This isn't fucking Johnny Tsunami.
|
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|
8,339 |
Well, they took away the controller.
|
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|
8,340 |
Did you know about *Rampart* before today? I didn't.
|
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|
8,341 |
I learned it from my parents because they love me.
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8,342 |
I think he got that from Einstein. \n\nEDIT: Thanks you guys, I feel cheap seeing as it was meta.
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|
8,343 |
She posts regularly on gonewild.
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8,344 |
Grandpa's not dead, that's just the last thing he said.
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8,345 |
Then you take the rat that survives and release it. Now that it has a taste for rat and mouse flesh, it will rid your island of vermin. \n
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8,346 |
For most people it would be tough to take Home Depot to a desert island....Terry Crews has the power.
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8,347 |
Ground Control: NEIL, THE MOON IS ABOUT TO TURN ON. GET OFF, GET THE FUCK OFF THE MOON!\n\nRIP Neil Armstrong.
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8,348 |
Experimenting like that when you're young is common, natural, and harmless. Nothing to worry about. \n\nEDIT: Let me clarify something here: *pre-pubescent kids* fooling around and asking about each others' bodies is what's common, natural, and harmless. If someone is being taken advantage of, being manipulated, etc., or if the situation involves a kid and a teenager/adult/whatever, that is *sexual abuse*. I feel weird having to explain this, but apparently some people are confused...
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|
8,349 |
What are your thoughts on the movie "Rampart"?
|
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|
8,350 |
Will: He used to just put a belt, a stick, and a wrench on the table. Just say, "Choose."\n\nSean: Well I gotta go with the belt there.\n\nWill: I used to go with the wrench.\n\nSean: Why the wrench?\n\nWill: 'Cause fuck him, that's why.
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|
8,351 |
"Now imagine how impressive that would've been if it showed up right away!"
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|
8,352 |
We secretly switched out their Folgers Brand Coffee with LSD. Let's see if anyone can tell the difference!
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|
8,353 |
This is true. I think Judd was doing the method actor thing during rehearsals. He was wearing Bender's clothes and trying to annoy me. I was fine but John Hughes was very protective of me. We ended up having a powwow, led by Ally. I remember her telling me, "We have to get him focused. Like a laser!" I think a bunch of us including myself called John and asked him to reconsider. I am thankful he did.
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|
8,354 |
Yeah, I mean, Tracy was a very sweet guy. \n\nHe was always watching really WEIRD TV shows on his TV. He'd have DVDS, or these tapes, he'd transfer them to DVD of like - the JACKSON FIVE special. And he'd be listening to the Jackson 5 from like 1970. He just had very *weird* taste. He was into wild, crazy, alternative programming.
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|
8,355 |
Dodged a bullet with that one.
|
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|
8,356 |
Just because Honey Badger don't care, don't mean Honey Badger don't feel.
|
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|
8,357 |
Not a chance in the world that happens. There's no way Bradford stays healthy all the way to week 5.
|
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}
|
8,358 |
Said no Indian woman ever...
|
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|
8,359 |
...And you'll never believe number 6...
|
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}
|
8,360 |
I, too, take Intro to Psychology
|
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|
8,361 |
The scene the OP described where the son was just watching him leave from the window, blank-faced, was seriously a little chilling.
|
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|
8,362 |
Why did i want/expect the note to rhyme?
|
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|
8,363 |
> I was chasing her, Later, she was chasing me, then I was chasing her.\n\nAre you Pac-Man?
|
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|
8,364 |
in the same vein*, i once saw a guy in a ninja costume being blown by snow white. in the kitchen. in the middle of a party.
|
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|
8,365 |
*HOLY SHIT HE HAS A BANDANNA GET THE FUCK DOWN.*
|
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}
|
8,366 |
Hopefully not with a truck this time.
|
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}
|
8,367 |
*HAHA WE WIN THIS TIME*
|
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|
8,368 |
I laughed when I saw "Two Broke Girls". The fucking premise of them being very poor is in the fucking title, yet they have a gigantic fucking apartment in Brooklyn.
|
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|
8,369 |
Haha! Yes, that scene was a joke to test you! You totally passed the test! ha...\n\n:( x2
|
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|
8,370 |
Start choking them and say "Breathing hard or hardly breathing?".
|
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|
8,371 |
For some reason this was the comment I teared up at. Your mom only eating half got me. She's a good mother. Hope you're both in a much better financial situation now.
|
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|
8,372 |
I'm nothing special. I'm just a dude who likes to dance.\n\n\nEdit: As I've said below, this isn't [the first time](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XKyVMZjdEI&feature=youtu.be) I've made an idiot of myself [on national television](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lOflp4Bm90) .
|
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|
8,373 |
Let me put it in reddit terms: A rejection is not *-1* like a downvote. It's a 0. You don't lose any karma. Once you realize this, you'll be much less hesitant in hunting for those upvotes.\n\nRemember, even the stupidest shit will get upvoted sometimes. Just look at the frontpage for proof.
|
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|
8,374 |
Yeah, I'd regret deleting them, too.
|
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|
8,375 |
I have seen people faint like that many times, you were not out for long, probably less than a minute, it probably would not have made a difference if you hadn't fainted honestly.
|
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|
8,376 |
You know, this is the first one that actually pissed me off...
|
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|
8,377 |
That's just racist. #SamsungLivesMatter
|
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|
8,378 |
Kid shoulda ate the fucking Oreo.
|
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|
8,379 |
trust me u're like 5% smarter and 150% hornier
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|
8,380 |
Reddit: where posting is a 3 man job.
|
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|
8,381 |
what a shit lord, those kids probably haven't chosen a gender yet and she's imposing one on them.
|
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|
8,382 |
http://i.imgur.com/unSwj.jpg
|
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|
8,383 |
*pervert and the teachhhh*
|
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|
8,384 |
But do you use your yellow blinky things?
|
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|
8,385 |
> we talk, but actually, probably, we just released a script,\n\nMan, I hate it when I think I'm talking to a friend but then I realise I'm actually just releasing a script with them.
|
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|
8,386 |
More importantly, don't contact my friends or family.
|
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|
8,387 |
Where? When? PM me all the details. Not promising anything but this could be cool. If my schedule works out I would do this.
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|
8,388 |
They held a race to next Wednesday and /u/N8theGr8 won!
|
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|
8,389 |
yessss somebody got it. its basically one camera, 2 shots, and 5 mins on ms paint
|
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|
8,390 |
I realize I'm not as knowledgeable as you guys, but I really am excited by all of this work online. It reminds me of the early days of cable news. Thanks for the support everyone!
|
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|
8,391 |
Keep grinding. You'll score that extra life eventually. ;)
|
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|
8,392 |
rainnthunder sent me a PM with some more details. Can't be 100% certain, but it may actually be her. :)
|
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|
8,393 |
And if it were just two, it would be "Pair o' Normal Activities."
|
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|
8,394 |
For your information, it's because he's hideous.
|
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|
8,395 |
Maybe that man was future you and he'd always wanted to smoke with himself.
|
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|
8,396 |
like an efficiency apartment...\n\n(shudder)
|
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|
8,397 |
A creative way to capitalize on being the subject of a very negative meme: nice work Blake.\n\n\nAlso, never make another rap video. You really suck.
|
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|
8,398 |
I work at MySpace too.
|
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}
|
8,399 |
Ridiculous! They will get 2 TRAUMAS, AT LEAST.\n\nEDIT: Wow, my first gold. Thank you, kind sir/madam.
|
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}
|
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