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ABSOLUTE
'Tis cool, sir, isn't it?--rather chilly somehow:--but I shall be
late--I have a particular engagement.
Sir ANTHONY
Stay!--Why, I thought you were looking for me?--Pray, Jack, where is't
you are going?
ABSOLUTE
Going, sir?
Sir ANTHONY
Ay, where are you going?
ABSOLUTE
Where am I going?
Sir ANTHONY
You unmannerly puppy!
ABSOLUTE
I was going, sir, to--to--to--to Lydia--sir, to Lydia--to make matters
up if I could;--and I was looking for you, sir, to--to----
Sir ANTHONY
To go with you, I suppose.--Well, come along.
ABSOLUTE
Oh! zounds! no, sir, not for the world!--I wished to meet with you,
sir,--to--to--to--You find it cool, I'm sure, sir--you'd better not
stay out.
Sir ANTHONY
Cool!--not at all.--Well, Jack--and what will you say to Lydia?
ABSOLUTE
Oh, sir, beg her pardon, humour her--promise and vow: but I detain you,
sir--consider the cold air on your gout.
Sir ANTHONY
Oh, not at all!--Not at all! I'm in no hurry.--Ah! Jack, you
youngsters, when once you are wounded here [Putting his hand to
CAPTAIN ABSOLUTE's breast.] Hey! what the deuce have you got here?
ABSOLUTE
Nothing, sir--nothing.
Sir ANTHONY
What's this?--here's something damned hard.
ABSOLUTE
Oh, trinkets, sir! trinkets!--a bauble for Lydia!
Sir ANTHONY
Nay, let me see your taste.--[Pulls his coat open, the sword falls.]
Trinkets!--a bauble for Lydia!--Zounds! sirrah, you are not going to
cut her throat, are you?
ABSOLUTE
Ha! ha! ha!--I thought it would divert you, sir, though I didn't mean
to tell you till afterwards.
Sir ANTHONY
You didn't?--Yes, this is a very diverting trinket, truly!
ABSOLUTE
Sir, I'll explain to you.--You know, sir, Lydia is romantic, devilish
romantic, and very absurd of course: now, sir, I intend, if she refuses
to forgive me, to unsheath this sword, and swear--I'll fall upon its
point, and expire at her feet!
Sir ANTHONY
Fall upon a fiddlestick's end!--why, I suppose it is the very thing
that would please her.--Get along, you fool!
ABSOLUTE
Well, sir, you shall hear of my success--you shall hear.--_O
Lydia!--forgive me, or this pointed steel_--says I.
Sir ANTHONY
_O, booby! stay away and welcome_--says she.--Get along! and damn your
trinkets!
[Exit CAPTAIN ABSOLUTE.]
[Enter DAVID, running.]
DAVID
Stop him! stop him! Murder! Thief! Fire!--Stop fire! Stop fire!--O Sir
Anthony--call! call! bid 'm stop! Murder! Fire!
Sir ANTHONY
Fire! Murder!--Where?
DAVID
Oons! he's out of sight! and I'm out of breath! for my part! O Sir
Anthony, why didn't you stop him? why didn't you stop him?
Sir ANTHONY