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FAG |
Miss Lydia Languish.--But there is an old tough aunt in the way; |
though, by-the-by, she has never seen my master--for we got acquainted |
with miss while on a visit in Gloucestershire. |
THOMAS |
Well--I wish they were once harnessed together in matrimony.--But pray, |
Mr. Fag, what kind of a place is this Bath?--I ha' heard a deal of |
it--here's a mort o' merrymaking, hey? |
FAG |
Pretty well, Thomas, pretty well--'tis a good lounge; in the morning we |
go to the pump-room (though neither my master nor I drink the waters); |
after breakfast we saunter on the parades, or play a game at billiards; |
at night we dance; but damn the place, I'm tired of it: their regular |
hours stupify me--not a fiddle nor a card after eleven!--However, Mr. |
Faulkland's gentleman and I keep it up a little in private |
parties;--I'll introduce you there, Thomas--you'll like him much. |
THOMAS |
Sure I know Mr. Du-Peigne--you know his master is to marry Madam Julia. |
FAG |
I had forgot.--But, Thomas, you must polish a little--indeed you |
must.--Here now--this wig!--What the devil do you do with a wig, |
Thomas?--None of the London whips of any degree of _ton_ wear wigs now. |
THOMAS |
More's the pity! more's the pity! I say.--Odd's life! when I heard how |
the lawyers and doctors had took to their own hair, I thought how |
'twould go next:--odd rabbit it! when the fashion had got foot on the |
bar, I guessed 'twould mount to the box!--but 'tis all out of |
character, believe me, Mr. Fag: and look'ee, I'll never gi' up |
mine--the lawyers and doctors may do as they will. |
FAG |
Well, Thomas, we'll not quarrel about that. |
THOMAS |
Why, bless you, the gentlemen of the professions ben't all of a |
mind--for in our village now, thoff Jack Gauge, the exciseman, has |
ta'en to his carrots, there's little Dick the farrier swears he'll |
never forsake his bob, though all the college should appear with their |
own heads! |
FAG |
Indeed! well said, Dick!--But hold--mark! mark! Thomas. |
THOMAS |
Zooks! 'tis the captain.--Is that the Lady with him? |
FAG |
No, no, that is Madam Lucy, my master's mistress's maid. They lodge at |
that house--but I must after him to tell him the news. |
THOMAS |
Odd! he's giving her money!--Well, Mr. Fag---- |
FAG |
Good-bye, Thomas. I have an appointment in Gyde's porch this evening at |
eight; meet me there, and we'll make a little party. |
[Exeunt severally.] |
[LYDIA sitting on a sofa, with a book in her hand. Lucy, as just |
returned from a message.] |
LUCY |
Indeed, ma'am, I traversed half the town in search of it: I don't |
believe there's a circulating library in Bath I ha'n't been at. |
LYDIA |
And could not you get _The Reward of Constancy_? |
LUCY |
No, indeed, ma'am. |
LYDIA |
Nor _The Fatal Connexion_? |
LUCY |
No, indeed, ma'am. |
LYDIA |
Nor _The Mistakes of the Heart_? |
LUCY |
Ma'am, as ill luck would have it, Mr. Bull said Miss Sukey Saunter had |
just fetched it away. |
LYDIA |
Heigh-ho!--Did you inquire for _The Delicate Distress_? |
LUCY |
Or, _The Memoirs of Lady Woodford_? Yes, indeed, ma'am. I asked every |
where for it; and I might have brought it from Mr. Frederick's, but |
Lady Slattern Lounger, who had just sent it home, had so soiled and |
dog's-eared it, it wa'n't fit for a Christian to read. |
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