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dozen bumpers to little Lydia.
ABSOLUTE
That I will with all my heart.----
[Exit ACRES.]
Now for a parental lecture--I hope he has heard nothing of the business
that brought me here--I wish the gout had held him fast in Devonshire,
with all my soul!
[Enter Sir ANTHONY ABSOLUTE.]
Sir I am delighted to see you here; looking so well! your sudden
arrival at Bath made me apprehensive for your health.
Sir ANTHONY
Very apprehensive, I dare say, Jack.--What, you are recruiting here,
hey?
ABSOLUTE
Yes, sir, I am on duty.
Sir ANTHONY
Well, Jack, I am glad to see you, though I did not expect it, for I
was going to write to you on a little matter of business.--Jack, I have
been considering that I grow old and infirm, and shall probably not
trouble you long.
ABSOLUTE
Pardon me, sir, I never saw you look more strong and hearty; and I pray
frequently that you may continue so.
Sir ANTHONY
I hope your prayers may be heard, with all my heart. Well, then, Jack,
I have been considering that I am so strong and hearty I may continue
to plague you a long time. Now, Jack, I am sensible that the income of
your commission, and what I have hitherto allowed you, is but a small
pittance for a lad of your spirit.
ABSOLUTE
Sir, you are very good.
Sir ANTHONY
And it is my wish, while yet I live, to have my boy make some figure in
the world. I have resolved, therefore, to fix you at once in a noble
independence.
ABSOLUTE
Sir, your kindness overpowers me--such generosity makes the gratitude
of reason more lively than the sensations even of filial affection.
Sir ANTHONY
I am glad you are so sensible of my attention--and you shall be master
of a large estate in a few weeks.
ABSOLUTE
Let my future life, sir, speak my gratitude; I cannot express the sense
I have of your munificence.--Yet, sir, I presume you would not wish me
to quit the army?
Sir ANTHONY
Oh, that shall be as your wife chooses.
ABSOLUTE
My wife, sir!
Sir ANTHONY
Ay, ay, settle that between you--settle that between you.
ABSOLUTE
A wife, sir, did you say?
Sir ANTHONY
Ay, a wife--why, did not I mention her before?
ABSOLUTE
Not a word of her, sir.
Sir ANTHONY
Odd so!--I mustn't forget her though.--Yes, Jack, the independence I
was talking of is by marriage--the fortune is saddled with a wife--but
I suppose that makes no difference.
ABSOLUTE
Sir! sir!--you amaze me!
Sir ANTHONY
Why, what the devil's the matter with the fool? Just now you were all
gratitude and duty.
ABSOLUTE
I was, sir,--you talked to me of independence and a fortune, but not a
word of a wife.
Sir ANTHONY
Why--what difference does that make? Odds life, sir! if you have the
estate, you must take it with the live stock on it, as it stands.
ABSOLUTE