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they in good earnest applauded those things that he only liked in jest;
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and from hence you may gather how little courtiers would value either me
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or my counsels."
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To this I answered, "You have done me a great kindness in this relation;
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for as everything has been related by you both wisely and pleasantly, so
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you have made me imagine that I was in my own country and grown young
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again, by recalling that good Cardinal to my thoughts, in whose family I
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was bred from my childhood; and though you are, upon other accounts, very
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dear to me, yet you are the dearer because you honour his memory so much;
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but, after all this, I cannot change my opinion, for I still think that
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if you could overcome that aversion which you have to the courts of
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princes, you might, by the advice which it is in your power to give, do a
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great deal of good to mankind, and this is the chief design that every
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good man ought to propose to himself in living; for your friend Plato
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thinks that nations will be happy when either philosophers become kings
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or kings become philosophers. It is no wonder if we are so far from that
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happiness while philosophers will not think it their duty to assist kings
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with their counsels." "They are not so base-minded," said he, "but that
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they would willingly do it; many of them have already done it by their
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books, if those that are in power would but hearken to their good advice.
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But Plato judged right, that except kings themselves became philosophers,
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they who from their childhood are corrupted with false notions would
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never fall in entirely with the counsels of philosophers, and this he
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himself found to be true in the person of Dionysius.
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"Do not you think that if I were about any king, proposing good laws to
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him, and endeavouring to root out all the cursed seeds of evil that I
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found in him, I should either be turned out of his court, or, at least,
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be laughed at for my pains? For instance, what could I signify if I were
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about the King of France, and were called into his cabinet council, where
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several wise men, in his hearing, were proposing many expedients; as, by
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what arts and practices Milan may be kept, and Naples, that has so often
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slipped out of their hands, recovered; how the Venetians, and after them
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the rest of Italy, may be subdued; and then how Flanders, Brabant, and
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all Burgundy, and some other kingdoms which he has swallowed already in
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his designs, may be added to his empire? One proposes a league with the
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Venetians, to be kept as long as he finds his account in it, and that he
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ought to communicate counsels with them, and give them some share of the
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spoil till his success makes him need or fear them less, and then it will
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be easily taken out of their hands; another proposes the hiring the
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Germans and the securing the Switzers by pensions; another proposes the
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gaining the Emperor by money, which is omnipotent with him; another
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proposes a peace with the King of Arragon, and, in order to cement it,
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the yielding up the King of Navarre's pretensions; another thinks that
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the Prince of Castile is to be wrought on by the hope of an alliance, and
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that some of his courtiers are to be gained to the French faction by
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pensions. The hardest point of all is, what to do with England; a treaty
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of peace is to be set on foot, and, if their alliance is not to be
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depended on, yet it is to be made as firm as possible, and they are to be
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called friends, but suspected as enemies: therefore the Scots are to be
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kept in readiness to be let loose upon England on every occasion; and
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some banished nobleman is to be supported underhand (for by the League it
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cannot be done avowedly) who has a pretension to the crown, by which
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means that suspected prince may be kept in awe. Now when things are in
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so great a fermentation, and so many gallant men are joining counsels how
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to carry on the war, if so mean a man as I should stand up and wish them
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to change all their counsels--to let Italy alone and stay at home, since
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the kingdom of France was indeed greater than could be well governed by
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one man; that therefore he ought not to think of adding others to it; and
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if, after this, I should propose to them the resolutions of the
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Achorians, a people that lie on the south-east of Utopia, who long ago
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engaged in war in order to add to the dominions of their prince another
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kingdom, to which he had some pretensions by an ancient alliance: this
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they conquered, but found that the trouble of keeping it was equal to
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that by which it was gained; that the conquered people were always either
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in rebellion or exposed to foreign invasions, while they were obliged to
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be incessantly at war, either for or against them, and consequently could
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never disband their army; that in the meantime they were oppressed with
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taxes, their money went out of the kingdom, their blood was spilt for the
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glory of their king without procuring the least advantage to the people,
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who received not the smallest benefit from it even in time of peace; and
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that, their manners being corrupted by a long war, robbery and murders
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everywhere abounded, and their laws fell into contempt; while their king,
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distracted with the care of two kingdoms, was the less able to apply his
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mind to the interest of either. When they saw this, and that there would
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be no end to these evils, they by joint counsels made an humble address
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to their king, desiring him to choose which of the two kingdoms he had
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the greatest mind to keep, since he could not hold both; for they were
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too great a people to be governed by a divided king, since no man would
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willingly have a groom that should be in common between him and another.
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Upon which the good prince was forced to quit his new kingdom to one of
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his friends (who was not long after dethroned), and to be contented with
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his old one. To this I would add that after all those warlike attempts,
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the vast confusions, and the consumption both of treasure and of people
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that must follow them, perhaps upon some misfortune they might be forced
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to throw up all at last; therefore it seemed much more eligible that the
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king should improve his ancient kingdom all he could, and make it
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flourish as much as possible; that he should love his people, and be
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beloved of them; that he should live among them, govern them gently and
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let other kingdoms alone, since that which had fallen to his share was
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big enough, if not too big, for him:--pray, how do you think would such a
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speech as this be heard?"
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"I confess," said I, "I think not very well."
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"But what," said he, "if I should sort with another kind of ministers,
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whose chief contrivances and consultations were by what art the prince's
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treasures might be increased? where one proposes raising the value of
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specie when the king's debts are large, and lowering it when his revenues
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