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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [16/m] Need help with >>> [16/f] :/
POST: So there's this girl i go to school with, who quite frankly is the most amazing person i have ever met in my life, and i like her. A lot.
The problem is, she has this crush on a guy in the year above us, and has for quite a while.
He is also in a relationship with someone else, but she isn't keen on the idea of getting into a relationship with anyone while she still likes this guy.
I'm terrible at this whole thing, so have no idea if she has inclination of liking me at all, we're friends, and have been for a while, but it's always felt sort of one-sided.
my question is, should i simply ask her out and see what happens (please bear in mind she's already turned down a few guys in the recent year and a bit) and if so how the hell do i do that?
TL;DR: | I like her, she likes someone else (as far as i know), ask her out, ye or nay? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24F] with my fwb (31M) 5 months saw me out with other guy, now I feel guilty
POST: Okay so I'm in a messy situation and my mind has been reeling all day. I met a guy named "Jay" about 6 months ago and he is a nice guy, but our "relationship" has always had an expiration date, we both have tinder, we never talked about being exclusive, and I would have said no to that. He is great, but my feelings for him are not relationship level and I am not will to do long distance.
Enter "Adam", I meet a new guy, I am extremely attracted to him. He's really smart, has ambition, and is artistic. We went out to the club last night and things progressed pretty rapidly. We were making out and dancing all night. It was a blast.
I knew there was a possibility that Jay would be there, because he had told me to let him know if I was going. I didn't want to tell him because I had plans with this other guy and I didn't want to hurt his feelings. Anyway, I was looking at pics the club put up last night, and of course there was a picture where Jay is standing there looking directly at me and Adam.
I tried to contact Jay a few times today and he has been ignoring my messages even though it says he is online.
So What should I do? Apologize? Pretend like nothing happened? Cut my losses and move on? I feel guilty, but only because I may have hurt his feelings. I just don't know how to move forward.
TL;DR: | my casual fwb saw me out with another dude, now I hurt his feelings, and I don't know what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [43F] with my [37M BF] 4 mo, he shuts down when things go bad.
POST: We have been dating 4 months. Everything seemes fine. He noted that sometimes when things go south for him, he used to "check out" and go incognito for a few days. I did the same thing last year (diagnosed with depression) but sought help as it would affect my personal relationships.
We were supposed to hang out Monday. He never showed. Tuesday at 3 pm I sent a text saying "I missed seeing you last night". He responded (at 11 pm) "I got an injury (he's a football player), and on top of that I found out a friend of mine died this weekend, just taking a few days to deal with this."
Question is, we had plans this weekend with another coulple (that costs $$$), & I havent spoken to him in 4 days (except to say I'm here for him if he wants to talk). At what point do I call off our plans and go do my own thing? I want to see/talk/spend time with him and be there to support him, but I feel totally shut out.
My depression says to shut off my phone, cancel the plans, and wallow in my sorrow off in the mountains this weekend, since our plans are ruined.
TL;DR: | Me & BF had plans, he got bad news & shut down & won't talk to me- do I move on with weekend plans? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My gf [24f] still keeps her ex's deodorant?
POST: Hello. I"m 27m, and my girlfriend of one year [24f] and I have been going strong. During our first few months, I saw that she had a bottle of axe, and I said, "Is that your version of an air freshener?" She told me that it belonged to her ex. They had dated from high school throughout college, so I figured, ok...
She moved a few months ago, and while we were packing/moving, I saw the axe, and I said, "Did you still want to keep this?" She said, "Nah, I'll probably just toss it," and we went on our merry way.
Just last week, I went into her dresser to look for something (not snooping, genuinely looking for something) and in the back corner, I see this axe bottle.
At this point, I don't really feel like bringing it up anymore, as I feel like I'm beating a dead horse. This obviously means something to her, (she brought it across the country to her first residence when we started dating, and moved it again to her new place) and I don't really want to push her into it...but...they've been broken up for 3 years now. Is this weird?
TL;DR: | my girlfriend of a year still has her ex's deodorant in the back of her dresser. Is it weird? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (20F) boyfriend (19M) and I keep almost breaking up over his video game habit
POST: As the title says, we keep almost breaking up. During the summer we were in a LDR because college had let out and he put in very little effort. No phone calls, Skype, letters, even though we had made that promise.
Now back at school, all he has done the past four days is want to play video games, nap, and work. I feel like a lot of time should go towards me because we haven't been together. The other day I told him were just too different and he begged me to stay. Yesterday I caught him in a lie, called him a liar, and then he refused to give me the time he promised. So I told him my door locks at midnight and a box of his belongings would be waiting for him. He said his game would be done at 11:51. I told him the box was packed.
He comes in and we are arguing and he says that something obviously isn't working. I said if he wanted to break up then.get it over with, but that I wouldn't let him back in my life. He said he wants to spend less time with me to play video games.
I don't know what to do
TL;DR: | MY BOYFRIEND OF EIGHT MONTHS HAS SPENT HALF OF OUR RELATIONSHIP CONSUMED BY VIDEO GAMES |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: (27F) Went to visit a guy (34M) out of state to maybe try a relationship but failed
POST: I really thought I found the one for me but I was wrong. I met a guy while I was in Texas for work and I'm from California. He seemed perfect for me and we would text everyday for months until we finally decided I should come visit him. We had so much in common and seemed to hit it off. He even told me his goal was to get married in 2 years and have kids in 4 years so I really thought I had a chance. But when I got home after visiting he told me he just views me as a friend.
Even though we never spent much time together, I feel like my heart is broken. I'm crying all the time and don't know what to do and how to get over him. I feel so hopeless, alone, and stupid. Should I call him and just talk to him? Should I just drop all communication with him?
TL;DR: | WENT TO VISIT A FRIEND WHO I WANTED TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH BUT HE DIDN'T FEEL THE SAME WAY |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by letting a horrid fart out at my desk at work, and a co-worker loooved the smell
POST: So I got my usual coffee to banish the last vestiges of slumber and sat at my desk, feeling generally ok. I had a breakfast of yogurt and lots of almonds and walnuts and was feeling kinda full. As I sat down, steaming coffee in my hands, I felt a earth moving rumble in my stomach and tried to ignore it. It continued, and I kept shuffling in my seat. Eventually, a piccolo of flatus escaped, tiny sound but pungent aroma. Within a few seconds, my co-worker turns over to me and asks what that smell is. I freeze up, shamed and embarrassed. He says, "is that the coffee, it smells amazing...it smells like fresh hazelnuts" and proceeds to inhale deeply, several times. I have to work with him for the rest of my time here, and I can't really take him seriously anymore.
TL;DR: | let out a nutty fart at work and watched, in horror, as my co-worker inhaled the 'divine' aroma |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: [16/M] Needs dating advice for a girl [16/F]
POST: Now I am a boy around the age of 16 and I have a problem there is a girl I have liked pretty strongly for the past year. I am pretty sure I am not in the friend zone but one of my best friends is going to the school prom with her in 32 days because they both have nobody to go with I am pretty sure if i confronted him he would allow me to go with her because hes a nice guy.
I am way too shy to do anything and I can't bear the think about what it will be like at the prom going with anybody else seeing them two dance. now I feel very strongly about this girl. What is the best way to show her I like her and ask her to prom as I get mixed feelings from her so I don't know if she likes me back. I am English if that helps.
TL;DR: | Shy [16/M] guy needs help asking someone out [16/F] But needs to be done before prom in a month |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (M20) embarrassed my GF (F20). What do?
POST: Long story short. I (M20) work for my gf (F20) of about 1.5 years. This morning she told me to do something at work and i gave her lip without thinking about it. A moment later I'm like "shit I'm at work now and shes my boss". I pretty much embarrassed her in front of my co-worker.
She's been pissed all day and I finished my shift a couple hours ago and soon have to go pick her up. I dont even begin to know how to apologize or do right by her as Im completely in the wrong here.
Side note; my co-workers dont know my boss and I are dating.
TL;DR: | I embarresed my gf. I let her down. She's rightfully pissed and idk what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [17M] going on a date with this girl [19F] and im really shy/awkward
POST: Hi, im 17 years old. A friend of mine told this girl about me q few days ago, so I've been texting this girl for like 4-5 days now. I have her instagram, snapchat.. so i know what she looks like. But this will be my first time seeing her in person, and im really quiet and shy. What do I talk about on this whole date? Ive never even heard her talk in person but she's flirty on the phone. Like yeah, I know her name, the basic facts, and what she looks like.. but I feel like I hardly know her. What should I talk about over texting until the date? What should I talk about on the date??
TL;DR: | There's a girl im going to the movies with but I don't know what to say, how to act, etc. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [mid-twenties M] with my gf [early twenties F] of 3/4 year, she lives at home, her dad is a low-level tyrant, don`t know what to do.
POST: My gf`s dad for the first time enforced a rule where I can`t sleep at my girlfriend`s place (they live together). He is very used to getting his way, he is sort of a big baby, antisocial. His wife is insanely obedient. I don`t know how personally to take it, since he doesn`t let any of my gf`s friends sleep over, although I have many times in the past 6 months (30-40). He`s pretty anal-retentive and unhappy in general.
I`ve lived with tyrants before, and I don`t know if i can bow down again. I`m mid-twenties and feel like i`m in a grade-school relationship with this bullshit. He`s also said to her that I`m a good `first boyfriend`emphasis on first. Low-level tyrant, shit-disturber is getting to me. We are very happy otherwise
TL;DR: | How do I respond to a tyrant father when the gf still lives at home. lots of unneccessary headaches |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [16/M] What's my next move?
POST: Thish girl [16/F] and i was chatting (on facebook) and we got to the subject of fetishes. We told eachother what ours were and it was with a generally flirty tone.
Then she told me to make a list of girls that are mutual friends of ours, and that i you sleep with and who i would want a relationship with. I made her a list of seven girls (including her) and said that relationship were the same people.
She then made her list of seven, in which i was in aswell.
I dont really have a crush on her, but she's hot and fruity so why not?
Should i go for this? What is my next move?
Also, my friend tried his luck with her recently (while he was drunk) but she has said that she wasnt interested in him.
TL;DR: | this girl and i have both said that we want to sleep with eachother in a list, go or no go? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How can I collect money a recent ex-BF owes me?
POST: In February, my then-BF and I decided to purchase a 'family' Mexico vacation with my son. I had cash to pay for my son and myself, but my BF did not. He said he couldn't put the $800 for his part of the trip on his own credit card, so after many guarantees of no breakups and swearing he'd pay me back, I put his $800 trip on my credit card. 3 weeks later, he broke up with me.
We've remained friendly, but as of yet (2 months later), he still has not spoken with me about paying me back. He owes quite a bit in taxes and has other financial concerns. But having dated him for 3 years, I know how he spends money, so I know he could pay me back if he wanted to.
I've emailed him several times with options/suggestions for paying me back ($50/month to cover my minimum monthly payment on my credit card bill, PayPal, etc.). He has not acknowledged these emails.
At what point do I get 'ugly'? I can't really afford to throw away $800.
TL;DR: | Ex-boyfriend owes me $800 for a vacation he's no longer going on. How do I collect the money? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Is it normal to pay $75 to disable a car alarm?
POST: My girlfriend's 2001 Nissan Xterra's alarm started going off for no reason a few minutes after walking away so we had to disable it. I've Honestly never owned a car with an alarm so we took it to a car stereo place in town to get it disabled. Her clicker (key fob) is after-market which they said was causing the problem and that because it was a stock alarm in the car just unplugging it would also be unplugging all the lights and horn on the car. He said they would need to "reprogram" it and that it would take about an hour costing $75. I've really only owned older, mechanically simple, cars so I'm not sure what I'm talking about when it comes to alarm systems and engine computers (not even sure if the 2001 nissan xterra se has an engine computer). I seem to be failing when it comes to google research so I thought I'd try to get some help here. Thanks reddit!
TL;DR: | 2001 nissan xterra se with stock alarm and aftermarket key fob. $75 to disable alarm sound right? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I (22F) bang this guy (25M) or wait?
POST: So I've been talking to this guy on Tinder for a day or two ans we're meeting up at a bar near his house tonight.
I'm kind of in a weird place where I do really want a relationship but I am also DTF if I don't click with someone on a date personality-wise but I think he's cute.
But i'm conflicted if I should bang this guy or not. He's not the best texter and idk how this date is gonna go. When we text, he doesn't really ask many questions about me and I feel like the conversation is not very balanced. That could be because he's a bad texter but i'm not really feeling any sparks at the moment.
So what should I do? TMI but i'm super horny and masterbating just hasn't been cutting it lately. I want to have sex but I've been humped-and-dumped quite a bit and want to try a new approach by waiting. But I also want sex.
Then again, I dont want to miss out on sex with a hot guy if there isn't any chemistry on the date and he never hits me up after the date.
What do u suggest? See how the date goes and if i dont feel chemistry, fuck him? But then what if it's the kind of relationship where it's not instantaneous? This is all so risky lol
TL;DR: | Should I hookup on the first date if i'm not feeling any sparks and want to have sex or nah? |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: I am the world's worst closer...
POST: Dear reddit, I am as of last night the world's worst closer. Seriously, last night, I was on a date with my crush. Yes, THE one. We've known each other for three years, but on New Years Eve this year we started kissing. Or more accurately she started kissing me. We've met on several occasions after this, but never alone and nothing has ever happened since then. However, last night, I asked her out, and we went to the movies. We saw an horrible movie, the kind you don't see on Valentines day. It was a Norwegian horror-comedy movie called "Død Snø 2". Well during the movie, I felt kinda awkward about holding around her etc. The movie were all about killing zombies and showing as much blood and internal organs as possible. I asked her if she liked the movie, and surprisingly she said yes. After the movie we rushed to reach the bus back home.
There were never any awkwardness when we talked, but when I followed her to her door the awknardness came pretty fast. I don't know what happened, but I just hugged her, thanked her for the night and walked home. After that I just immediately facepalmed so hard. I know she is genuinly interested in me, and I'm pretty into her aswell. Why the f*** didn't I man up for once? Fuck me, reddit, fuck me. Thank you for reading, I just needed to get this off my chest.
TL;DR: | Went on a date with my crush. She is into me, I'm into her. I didn't man up. Fuck me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm a [30/M] trying to figure out the motives of my ex girlfriend[27/f].
POST: My ex and I ended on bad terms, but we always have undeniable chemistry. I didn't trust her at the time because she loves attention from certain types of men so I couldn't trust her.
We recently just started speaking and she had a bf. Whenever we talked we flirted and she would let it get to a certain point then shut me down.
She recently confessed that her and her bf broke up. He will be in London for a year and a half. I don't think she could take the pressure of a long distance relationship.
Why does she continue to reach out to me and send me selfies of her? Is she keeping me around for convenience? If this is the case,how should I treat her going forward?
TL;DR: | My ex just broke up with her bf and reaches out to me as if shes interested, but i'm skeptical. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by Drawing on my Arm with a Sharpie (Ironic)
POST: A bit of backstory - I've been attempting to learn how to dream lucidly, and one of the crucial parts is reality checks.
I decided that I would make a cool dreamy design to stencil onto my arm as a reality check reminder, and so I went ahead and did just that.
The stencil wasn't working so well, so I tried rubbing it out and drawing a freehand design.
Once I completed my design, I decided to spray it with hairspray so it would be like a temporary tattoo. This spraying really stung at the time, although I had no clue why.
Jump forward a couple hours and my arm has cuts all around where I drew my symbol, which led to a visit to my local hospital.
This visit showed that the cuts were actually very deep, and I required 3 stitches to close it up.
TL;DR: | I drew a symbol on my arm with a sharpie which resulted in 3 stitches and a whole lot of stinging. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (22F) am having trouble staying solid in my decision to break up with my bf (also 22) of over 6 years. Please help.
POST: My boyfriend and I have been together since we were 16, and while we have had a strong relationship, the last year and a half has been messy. We lived together for two years after high school but then broke up for about two weeks because things were not working between us.
We got back together shortly after to really try and work on our issues because we love each other, but a year later we are back to having those same problems and top of all of that, we had started formatting a plan for a big move across the country together (which took me years to get him comfortable with the idea of).
If that doesn't make this more confusing, i recently discovered that i am falling-in-like with a very close friend of his, who says he feels the same. I have loved my boyfriend for so long but so many different things are happening in our lives as young adults that it has made me seriously rethink our future. I feel so shitty about all of this crashing down as we are supposed to be picking up and leaving.
So reddit,
TL;DR: | i'm anxious for change, but at the end of the day i still love the guy. what the fuck do i do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [26m] shuts down emotionally when I'm with my gf [23f] and her friends (guys) since she seems to pay little attention to me. Help?
POST: Our first date was 3 months ago. We've broken up a few times but always get right back together. So we went to a wedding of one of her friends recently and we sat down at the dinner table. Another guy friend of hers from high school was there and my girlfriend talked and interacted with him for like 15 minutes without even acknowledging me. She walked around, found some interesting things, and told him all about them when she got back. I'm just sitting there stirring and waiting for her to say something to me. She doesn't so I locked up. She asked if she wanted to go out to the car to drink (it was a dry wedding so we took a bottle) and I said "Why would I want to do that?" I was a bit intoxicated at this time.
Previously, we went to her other friends and smoked, drank then went to a sex shop (as a joke). She walked around with her friend's bf and made jokes about the huge dong dildos. I eventually locked up there too.
I don't know why I do this or how I can prevent this. She is, what she calls friendly, I call flirty because it seems she's this way with other guys. Are there strategies I can use?
TL;DR: | Went to wedding, gf [23f] talked to other guy (friend), ignored me [26M], I locked up. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [17 M] with my Ex [17F] almost two years, broke up about a month and a half ago. I still miss her.
POST: My ex and I were dating for about 2 years. Shortly before our second anniversary she said she wanted a break saying she was unhappy and didn't know what she wanted. She's now with another guy.
She meant the world to me. I tried to give her everything and more. She told me she still loved me, missed me, and she's kissed me several times before she dated the other guy.
My question is how can I move on, or how can I get her back. We went through a lot together and she was the first one I truly let past my walls(rough childhood) and the first I truly believed I wanted to stay with. I've been told by many to move on, but I just cant.
Anyway, What should I do??
TL;DR: | Girlfriend and I broke up. She's with another guy and idk what to do as I still miss her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by farting in the shower with my pregnant girlfriend.
POST: This had actually happened last night.
We got in from the freezing cold that froze us to the bone and decided a hot shower was needed to warm up.
The shower was going great, as now we are nice and warm. While I'm the process of doing what most people do and actually clean ourselves, I let out a nice fart that actually was three farts.
There were lols.
Then I smell something. I turn around to make sure because, you know, these things need confirmation.
Oh dear God.
After she asks if I just turned around to smell my fart, I turn to her and tell her that I am sorry. Now why would I apologize for smelling my own fart? I didn't. It was because I knew what was to come, for, you see, being pregnant has given her a weak stomach.
"Oh God why?"
She turned and began to retch, followed by a violent slap of the vomit hitting the tub. This went on for several minutes.
While it had fixed her upset stomach, now her muscles hurt from the effort forced upon her from my epic fart trilogy.
TL;DR: | TIFU by farting in the shower, and the smell was so bad it made my pregnant girlfriend puke. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Could someone help me with my dog problems?
POST: I have an 8 year old Australian Shepard mix, and up until last year, she was the most gentle thing on the planet. However, last February we bought a 3 year old Pit mix and then in June bought a Cockapoo, and her behavior turned a 180. Both the Pit and the Poo are really friendly, but Angel (the Aussie) has taken to them rather badly. Since their arrival, Angel has become more food aggressive, territorial, and all around bitchier (pun intended.) Is this just a result of the new dogs, even though they've never done much of anything to her? Or could it just be her old age? Is there anything I can do to counter this? All tips are welcome. Thanks, Reddit!
TL;DR: | I got some new dogs, and now my old dog is being a real bitch. Why is this? Tips to help? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [21F] found out my sister [12F] has been cutting, I'm heart broken, help.
POST: This past Thursday I was away on assignment for work and I get a late night call from my father (64M if it matters) that my mom(51F) took my sister to the doctor and they saw the cuts on her leg. Immediately I lost my breath and broke down. That's my baby sister. I raised her because my parents weren't often around growing up. (My mother worked nights and my dad travels a lot for work) She's like my child.
My first thought went to blaming myself because only recently have I moved out, starting living my own life and I'm scared she feels abandoned by me or something.
I went by the house the other day and talked with my mom, and when I went upstairs to see my sister I could tell she had been crying. It looked like she had just stopped and she was trying to keep the conversation light.
I'm trying to be there for her, texting her often, asking her how she is. I'm not sure what else to do.
I have had similar issues with depression in the past, only instead of cutting I was destructive with painkillers and alcohol. In fact, I'm still in the recovery process. I'm putting my recovery process on hold because I know she needs someone and I know that this is waaay out of my parents' knowledge base.
I just need some suggestions on how I can help her as much as I can while still keeping my head above water.
TL;DR: | 12yo sister (that I raised) is struggling with depression. So am I. How can i be there for her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/legaladvice
TITLE: Rough Night --Charged with Theft
POST: I was drunk with some friends and we ended up stealing 3 mini fridges from a hotel parking lot at 3 AM. As we were walking across the road back to our place, we were spotted by some cops and we all received criminal citations for theft under $100. This morning, we went over to the hotel owners and said we wanted to make it right and buy the mini fridges we stole. I am now at a library printing up a receipt to prove that we paid for them.
My question is: can we provide proof of purchase and ownership in order to avoid theft charges?
Note that the theft citation was issued before we paid the owners for the mini fridges.
TL;DR: | Stole some mini fridges, got cited, want to know if we can pay for them to avoid/reduce charges. |
SUBREDDIT: r/jobs
TITLE: How Would You Respond? Job offer
POST: Hello everyone!
So I've been offered via recruiter on LinkedIn a Junior Developer position (I have a lot of self-employed business experience, but no degree).
It pays 40,000 to 44,000 a year. Right now I'm working in manufacturing making 36,000 a year. My insurance where I'm at now is good, but the costs keep increasing (was 8$ a week for dental and medical last year, now it's $12. Deductibles have gone up as well). We had profit sharing at 15%, but we are now at 6%. Raises are terrible (max 2%) and we offer 401k.
That aside, the Junior Developer job would offer a great career path. The company has amazing reviews on Glassdoor (4.3/5). My big concern though is the commute would be an 1.5 hours. I mapped it out and the closest we could get for both this joband my girlfriend, would be 50 minutes both ways. I currently have a 15 minute commute to work.
Thoughts?
TL;DR: | Junior Developer job offered (growth available) - 1.5 hour commute, $20-22 an hour, 4.3* Glassdoor |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: Dorm roommate issues
POST: So basically when I got to college this week my roommate asked me if I was cool with him smoking weed. I said yes because honestly I don't care and I can't say I haven't every now and again. Next thing I know it's happening every couple of hours, my room wreaks of it and so do all of my things. Then on the first night people start pouring in and out of my dorm room to buy from my roommate, pills, adderall, acid, and weed. It's three days in and it's been nonstop, I can't be in my dorm room without feeling horribly uncomfortable. I talked to him about it and he told me it was too bad. I don't want to ruin this guys life by calling the cops or anything, but should I tell my RA or just deal with it?
TL;DR: | Turns out my college roommate is a drug dealer, deals out of our dorm, kind of an asshole, what do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [32 M] with my SO [35 M/F]. She broke up with me today, after 3 and a half years' relationship.
POST: Me [32 M] with my SO [35 M/F]. She broke up with me today, after 3 and a half years' relationship.
She is the love of my life, and i was hoping to live with her soon.
She just texted me today (she is on another state for 10 days) saying that she needed to talk about us, as that shes was feeling really bad about it.
I called her and she said that we should break up, because shes didn't love me anymore, and it started about 4 months ago.
I was very dedicated to her but truly never felt the same from her.
I suffer of low self-steem and now i don't know what to do. I am kinda desperate right now, and can't imagine what comes next.
I don't believe she felt in love with another person, because she was cheated twice before on other relationships and i can't imagine that she can do the same with someone.
I need help. I can't stop thinking that's all my fault and that is crushing me.
TL;DR: | Me [32 M] with my SO [35 M/F]. She broke up with me today, after 3 and a half years' relationship. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: He called it a "bland" sex life?
POST: F 22 with s/o M 21, long distance for 90% of a 9 month relationship. We recently mutually agreed to go on a break, and got to talking tonight about our sex life. He's always brought up that I'm not kinky or adventurous enough… however my argument is that I see no need for it yet.
Seeing as how this is a LDR, we've only been physically together for 3 weeks total. To me that means that its still in a honeymoon phase where missionary is still exciting and every kiss knocks me off my feet. I'm not opposed to kinky at all, I'm just savoring the simplicity of new love.
Anyway, tonight he said that he found it all a little "bland". And that missionary is so basic and cowgirl wasn't rough enough for him.
This was incredibly disturbing to me. How can anyone say that their love life with their s/o is bland after less than a month of physicality? And yet still claim that I'm the love of their life and the only one they fantasize about?
TL;DR: | S/O thinks sex life is "bland" after 3 weeks, yet still claims he's with the love of his life |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I am [25 M] absolutely devastated, because my GF [23 F] told a guy next to me "I would kiss you, but my BF is here". What to do?
POST: I am with my GF of 6 months, everything was just absolutely flawless, like no problem whatsoever, we planned the wedding, kids etc.
So we were at a party, she wanted me to meet with her 2 best girlfriends with their BFs. So basically we were 3 couples. We drank a lot of alcohol. Out of nowhere I hear my GF saying the guy next to me "I would kiss you, but my BF is here". I was speechless for like 10 seconds and then i realized what I have just heard. I was like "WTF?". I have taken my GF to the bathroom and have talked with her there for 2 hours about it.
Her explanation "I wanted to see you jealous! Because you were looking horny (hard to translate, not a native speaker) at my older sister, just because she has large boobs etc.". "you are never jealous!" "I didnt want to hurt you!" "I would never say that if i knew that it would lead to this" "It wasnt meant like that, i would never do that, i would never kiss him for real".
I am now back at my place and she is sending me text messages, that she loves just me etc. and she also tried to kiss me a lot when we were getting out of the place.
What would you do?
TL;DR: | My GF told a guy next to me "I would kiss you, but my BF is here". What to do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/needadvice
TITLE: Got scared in a fleeting moment and now I need help.
POST: Been dating this girl on and off for three years. I am 21 now and she is 20. Both at the same school. I went abroad last semester, Spring 2011, and she stayed at school. We talked all summer long via Skype/messaging. But about a week before school started I decided that because she was a year below me that I didn't want to date with only one of us in school while the other, me, is out looking for a job.
My main issue was that if I were in a relationship that it would hinder me from getting a job. So that was three weeks ago. We hadn't talked until last night when I expressed that I had loved her and it took me these three weeks of not seeing and not talking to her to make me realize it.
This is a big step for me but she thinks this is just me being flaky and not following through with my actions. So my issue with this is I need to prove to her that I am committed. I have a few ideas but need to bounce them off of someone/people. I'll put them in the comments so just comment about whether you think they are good or not.
I do love her, we are not arguing about that. Just about my commitment to her which I completely understand and I recognize that I need to show her that now it is different.
TL;DR: | I need to prove to a girl that I am committed to her. My ideas are in the comments. Give advice? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by liking something on Facebook
POST: I'm not close with my step-family, but I recently found out my step-uncle had a severe brain tumour. My mom has been keeping me up to date with his condition through Facebook messenger, which I have only very recently added to my phone.
Ten minutes ago she messaged me to inform me that my step-uncle passed away this afternoon, and as I clicked on the message from my notification bar, my big fat stupid thumb hit the like button just below the message. And there is no way to undo that, so a big thumbs up was sent to my mother from me. I am mortified. (Luckily she knows I didn't mean it and had a giggle. But still!)
TL;DR: | My mom told me my step-uncle passed away today and I gave her a big old thumbs up at the news. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (36M) totally fucked up this wknd by hooking up with my married friend (35M). She wants to tell her husband (35M) about it and I'm afraid he might try to kill me.
POST: Let me start out by saying I feel tremendously guilty about this whole thing. I got blackout drunk and the girl I was supposed to marry left me a couple months ago so I was in a vulnerable place. Not making an excuse, just giving context. My friend, let's call her Annie, and I have been friends since we were kids. We've hooked up a few times before. We've always had a bit of a crush on each other but it never worked out. Annie is married with two kids with a guy from our high school, we'll call him Tony. Tony already hates me because of my past with Annie. I never, ever thought this would happen. I tried to convince her not to saying anything because it'll only make things much worse. I don't want her marriage to crumble because of what happened and I know I should have thought of that before hooking up. We did not have sex, just made out for a little while, not that it makes it any better. Is there anything I can do?
Fyi, I don't live in the same state as them but my friends and family do so I travel there often.
TL;DR: | Hooked up with a married friend, she wants to tell her husband, I'm afraid he might try to kill me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My SO (21) has a spare key and thought it was weird that I asked her to tell me when she is on her way over to my place. Am I in the wrong?
POST: My SO (21f) and I (23m) have been going out for about 6 months. When I left town for a few weeks I gave her a spare key to check on the place. I am glad she has it in case of emergencies or other unforeseen circumstances. She sleeps over often and leaves some of her stuff over (which is fine with me) and may need to get to it if I'm not around. However, I don't want her to feel like it is her place. I told her to tell me if she is on her way but she reacted unfavorably when I said this.
I don't think it is unreasonable for her to tell me she's coming as opposed to just showing up and opening the locked door. I care for her very much and have nothing to hide from her. I just think its weird for her to be showing up unannounced when we have only been dating for six months. However, she thinks its weird that I asked and feels like I'm hiding something. Apparently, none of her previous boyfriends felt this way. I told her that its important for us to have our boundaries. Am I being unreasonable?
TL;DR: | GF has a spare key; didn't react well when I told her to give me a heads up when she's on her way. |
SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: I asked a girl out while I was drunk...need advice!
POST: Let me preface this by saying that we are both in college and that we are friends. We were at another friend's place for a party, I was drunk and she was tipsy as she had just gotten back from a concert.
Now I have always thought that she was cute and she has a great personality, so my drunk self decided to ask her out on a date. And she told me to ask her when I am sober. I want to ask her out on a date. However, I just want to know if she said that to me in order to be nice and not have to reject me, or if she wanted to make sure I am in the right state of mind. So in conclusion, should I ask her on a date? Thanks in advance, ladies!
TL;DR: | Asked a friend out when I was drunk, she said to ask her when I am sober, should I do it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22 M] with my GF [20 F] 2+, she doesn't want to talk about what she does and post online
POST: So basically my GF has a tumblr where she post about random fan-fic and stuff, and I had to beg her to show me because I'm the no secrets kind-of-guy.
I see this really how you say really descriptive post she made about two characters which she "Ships", really descriptive sexual stuff which I'd rather not pose. Personally I find it quite tame but my GF never showed me this side of her and she basically says I'm not allowed to talk about it with her.
I think she's really trying to bottle up her feelings and is emberssed to tell me because I think she's constantly thinking about fictional characters banging which is further enhanced because she keeps denying talking to me about it.
She also says she'll talk about it with me in time which I say why do you need to do that unless it's complicated, then she replies it's not complicated she just needs time to prepare to talk about it which throws me for another loop.
It started out as just me laughing at reading it but it seems she seems more interested in the sex lives of fictional characters then our own. Like she's really into it it seems but when it comes to me and her reciprocation it seems very little, cold and tame compared to what she posts.
TL;DR: | GF won't talk to me about what she post online, am I over-reacting or is there something else? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I am physically addicted to Benzo's and want to get off. What kind of doctor do I go see?
POST: Here's a quick rundown. I take Ativan every night to go to sleep. I don't get any high from it it just helps me relax and I go to sleep. It's never really interfered with my life. My friend gets prescribed 90 a month and gives me 30 of them. I've just gotten to the point where I don't want to take something to go to sleep and I get tired of asking her to give me more. I've taken them for about 2 years now. I want to wean off under a doctors supervision. I've gone two days without taking it and the withdrawals are hell.
My question is what kind of doctor do I go see? I don't really have a PCP, if I get sick I usually go to a doc-in-a-box type situation. Do I just find a doctor online and show up and say I want to be taken off this medicine I've been getting from a friend for two years? I've looked at local addiction centers / rehabs but they want me to put me in a rehab out in the woods and I can't take time off work to do that.
I'm on a tight budget and would hate to go see a doctor, pay the copays, and then have them refer me to a physciatrist or something.
TL;DR: | what kind of specialist should I look for to be weaned off Ativan. I do not want to go to a rehab. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [25/F] long distance partner [31/M] is becoming much more difficult to meet.
POST: I moved to Korea and have been seeing a man here exclusively but not officially for about four or five months. We are long distance (about three hours) but we have been traveling somewhere and spending a weekend together every third week and its been going great. I honestly really like him.
(the reason we are not official is because he plans to go abroad for a year and we agreed itd be too difficult to date like that. However, he asked me to wait for him to come back.)
We both ended up with Saturday jobs starting this weekend. We both signed contracts for them as well. This means we can only see each other for a night because we also have our normal jobs on Mondays.
He says be positive and just make it work but I'm not sure. What do you guys think? Any advice?
TL;DR: | I won't be able see my long distance guy very often and I'm worried that it'll be too much for us. |
SUBREDDIT: r/running
TITLE: Interesting and annoying problem that has been happening lately...
POST: As a quick introduction, I run mostly for fun and take decent runs every weekday (~7miles or less) while taking breaks on the weekends. I sometimes involve myself in competition and race my absolute hardest. However, after one particular race that took everything I had, I threw up. Now, this in itself is quite a normal occurrence and many people do it which doesn't concern me in the least. The issue is that now I can't stop. When I train, instead of feeling gassed and exhausted when I finish my route, I get stiff cheeks and my mouth gets running with that pre-throw up saliva, followed closely by a stream of puke. I just want to know if anyone else has this problem, and if they were able to stop it. Its not really a big deal, just a huge annoyance and it could be a problem if during a race I have to chuck up last night's dinner. Any solutions?
TL;DR: | Ran a hard race; puked at the end. Can no longer stop puking if I run a difficult or speedy time. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [19M] with 3 year [19F] girlfriend broke up for college. Need advice.
POST: We dated all through high school and knew college was coming, but we were in denial the past 6 months about leaving each other. We agreed that it would be best to break up for college rather than try to make the long distance thing work, but she left 2 weeks ago, I'm leaving tomorrow, and it sucks.
When we first agreed to break up for college I was excited about it. I loved our relationship and never cheated, but that doesn't mean I didn't occasionally think about other girls. So I thought that breaking up would be great, turns out it's not.
We won't be able to visit often except breaks, so although we would both love to stay together it just really doesn't make sense. We both want to have the full "college experience" everyone tells us about and how you can't get that if you're in a relationship the whole time.
TL;DR: | People of reddit who have been here before, what did you do, and how did it work out for you guys? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [27 F] cheated on my husband [29 M] of 4 years. I've told him and we've talked it out and decided to move on from it but the guilt is killing me.
POST: We were having a rough patch and I stupidly had sex with a coworker about 6 months ago (don't work there anymore, there's been no contact with this guy since). I broke down and told him everything about 2 wks later and we decided we didn't want to throw it all away over this and we would both work on the relationship.
He seems to have forgiven me though it still comes up now and then but things are overall better. However, I'm at the point where little things still remind me of the shitty thing I've done and I'm wondering if anyone out there has been through this. I love him and would never betray him again. We're really trying to work on things so that we can make it through this but I just don't know if I can live with my guilt forever.
TL;DR: | Cheated on husband of 4 yrs and told him. He's forgiven me but I'm unable to handle the guilt. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [25 F] with my BF [30 M] of 6 years, his snoring is driving me insane
POST: Hi reddit. Obvious throwaway, because BF is a redditor.
So we've been in a relationship for ~6 beautiful years, but we have only recently moved together, since I have lived in the dorms for Uni.
We have slept together before, but I always thought my bf snored because he was tired (we are both very active people, and he works a phisically demanding job). Now that we share the same bed everynight, his snoring is driving me insane. I haven't slept a full night in weeks and I am exhausted. He snores so loud, I can hear him even if I am going to sleep on the couch. Ear plugs do not block him out.
I have brought this up with him and he's really embarrased. He bought a nasal spray and things somewhat improved, but I still can't sleep. Also, he's not fat, so the weight couldn't be a reason for his snoring. What's worse, I wake up in the middle of the night and nudge him until I wake him up , thus ruining his sleep too.
We have been to the doctor, and he doesn't have sleep apnea or anything. I love him, and we want to stay together.
How should I go about solving this problem?
TL;DR: | Boyfriend's snoring is driving me insane. He's not fat, and he's healthy. What do I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: Some people (redditors)
POST: Was at work today (I work as a server/bartender) when a younger guy came in and proceeded to threaten, harass, insult, and attempt to start a bar fight with everyone in there.
Given it was a slow night and we had started closing so it was down to just the staff and a few patrons but every time he said something he'd proceed to use "Its ok I'm a redditor" to hope all feelings of hostility would be removed.
Some quick quotes of why I'm annoyed:
"If this homo walks behind me one more time I'm going to shove this beer up his ass."
"Hitler's regime started because people like you wouldn't stop working to drink with me"
"You have two options here. Come to the bathroom with me so I can fuck you up privately or come outside with me so I can fuck you up publicly"
"The funny thing is I have a helicopter searching for me right now"
"Any time now a bunch of homophobes are going to be coming in here and starting shit. Let's just give them the gay as a sacrifice."
"That bartender has a great rack. I wish I could take the rack home with me. But she said no. So maybe you have a tazer we could use"
"If you try to run away I'm going to start shooting"
Given the guy was obviously just drunk and upset about something. But if you heard someone say all of these things then follow every line up with "Its O.k. I'm a redditor its just a joke" wouldn't you be upset?
TL;DR: | Douche insulted about a dozen people. Used "I'm a redditor" to explain why he's a douche. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit, I'm throwing my first ever house party this weekend. What do you think makes a good house party?
POST: Little background- I'm 21(f) and would like to throw a house party for my close friends, maybe around 30 people maximum. There's a fair bit of space. I already know to lock away anything valuable and I'm fully prepared for people spewing on the carpets/breaking things/stubbing cigarettes on the table.
I'm not mad and I know things can go very very wrong, but if that happens it's my own fault and I can accept that.
I've never thrown a party before and would like to know what I could do to make it memorable and a good laugh. I don't have a huge budget but don't mind bringing in a few crates of beer etc.
TL;DR: | How do I prepare my house for a party and what should I buy/do/set up for the party etc. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Older couples, how has your SO changed since their late 20's?
POST: I have the best girlfriend. We are in our late 20's. She's beautiful, funny, and perfect for me. We plan on growing old together blah blah you get me here... But she has a few wild hairs, flaws in my eyes, that she still has in her system. It's extremely hard for me to look past them and they have definitely been causing ripples in our relationship the past year. Things I knew about getting into this but I thought I could handle that I really can't. I know these things will pass though once she gets older and I don't want to risk losing the love of my life for things that won't be there in 10 years. Any advice? I'm not trying to get super deep here, there is just no one older I can talk to about this. Just looking for some short and sweet words of wisdom.
TL;DR: | I think I'm in love with my SO for who she is going to be in 10 years and not who she is now. |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: I'm not a creeper, I swear.
POST: This seems like the place to talk about this. I've always been what I consider an affectionate person when I like someone. But unfortunately, I seem to have developed no sense of boundaries, because I constantly want to hug or touch people that I like. I know that it's inappropriate and weirds people out so I restrain myself, but sometimes I just want to grab one of my friends and hug the shit out of them. This is tough as a guy, because if you touch your guys friends too much then you get a reputation for being gay (I'm straight btw), and if you touch your female friends at all you're liable to get slapped or considered a creep. I heard that one of the "love languages" is physical contact, but it seems like I'm some kind of weirdo because of this sometimes.
TL;DR: | Very few people can beat me in gay chicken. As soon as I get my first kiss, I shall be unbeatable. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Advice about traveling to Europe.
POST: So I've been on quite a few vacations with my family but have never left the country. I finally got my first "big boy" job and would like to go to Europe in August of this year with a friend or two. I've always wanted to take part in La Tomatina.
Ideally I'd like to start in Amsterdam, visit some landmarks and "coffee shops", though I'm not sure where I'd go?
and I want to end my trip with La Tomatina in Buñol, Spain (which is the whole reason I want to go).
Obviously my vacation would be limited to 10-14 days, which I realize isn't much time. I was told trains are expensive? What advice do people have for getting everything in order from across the sea?
I've just begun doing some research but seeing as how I am new at this I figured tips from fellow redditors would help get the ball rolliing!
and yes, I have a passport.
TL;DR: | I want to go to La Tomatina in Spain but have no idea where to start when it comes to traveling. |
SUBREDDIT: r/Pets
TITLE: We just found my missing cat under a foreclosed home in our neighborhood. How do we get her out?
POST: My cat Lyra has been missing for a month. We looked everywhere, made posters, made a CL post, etc. Finally, today we saw her in a hole under the porch of an abandoned home. There is another hole around the back that we have seen her come out of as well. She started purring loudly, but is too scared to let us handle her. She has lost considerable weight. We brought her food, but she only goes out when we are far from it. She is no longer purring. The holes are far too small for people and she isn't coming out of them or allowing us to pick her up. What should we do?
TL;DR: | Cat has been missing for a month. Now that she's found, she's too scared to come out or be rescued. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by forgetting I have a beard
POST: Not a big fuck-up, but definitely didn't make my morning. So, its been pretty cold out so I've spent the past two months growing out a beard to keep me warm for my 25-ish minute walk to class. In fact, its been so cold and snowy that we haven't had class for an entire week. When today we have class for the first time in forever, unsurprisingly I miss the alarm and am rushing to get out the door.
It's pretty cold out today. Not the coldest, but with windchill around zero degrees Fahrenheit. But, like I said, it's been a good 10 degrees or so colder for the last week, so it really shouldn't be too bad. I head outside, feel fine, and start walking to class.
Then my face starts to get cold. Like really cold. Borderline painfully cold, but I thought hey, I don't have any excuse to complain about the cold how I'm dressed, so it's all mental and I should suck it up. I get about 2/3rds of the way there when I finally cave and lift my hoodie up to my mouth so I can use my breath to warm my face. And then I notice I can only get my mouth about half way open.
I then came to the chilling realization that I had completely forgotten to dry my beard when I got out of the shower, and that it was now completely frozen to my face. No wonder it felt so freaking cold.
TL;DR: | Forgot to dry my beard, and got slapped in the face by the cold, long dick of monday morning. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [30f] with my boyfriend of 3.5 years [30M] i need help SHOULD I Stay or should i go?
POST: I'm 30F he's a 30M in a relationship for 3.5 years, He had
childhood trauma (mom issues). Carried a relationship with
another girl in another country for a year while he was with me.
Another time he was looking for a one night stand on Reddit said
he would never do it just wanted to see that it gave him a thrill of
the hunt . He said he was sorry, finally he went to see a therapist
and that's when he got diagnosed with a love and sex addiction.
He also says he doesn't know how to love that he can't feel love.
That he cares a lot about me but doesn't love me with his whole heart that he loves
me sometimes. I'm confused and hurt, we are going to see a
couples therapist soon. I love him so much he says that i'm the
greatest woman he has met, yet i don't want to hurt. Is it possible
to go through this addiction together? Has anyone ever done it
and had success? i need advice.
TL;DR: | Bf has a sex and love addiction want to know if we can go through this together? or do we split? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: (F)24 fighting with boyfriend (25) over hearthstone beta... Literally.
POST: I'll give you the short of it, so since you can buy the beta key now my boyfriend begged me to wait for him since he was broke. I've been waiting forever anxiously to play this game. Well he's be scouring the internet to win a key, he does, he just starts fucking playing! I'm upset because I waited and he won't do remotely the same for me??? It's honestly not even about the game, I'm just frustrated that I'm expected to wait forever on new things (this isn't the first time), but the second he has the ability and I don't he couldn't care less! If I had done the same thing he would have had a fit. Well going on two days of not talking... I'm genuinely hurt he wouldn't have even considered me... What else won't he consider me for. Should I just get over it and call him or keep waiting for him to apologize? My assumption is he's been on that stupid game for two days and hasn't even noticed my absence...btw been together little over a year.
TL;DR: | my boyfriend is a 5 year old when it comes to new toys and won't let me have them before him. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: So my mother lost all of her family photos on a nuked hard drive.
POST: My mother started getting into photography with her first digital camera over ten years ago. She took thousands of photos of friends, family, my graduation, ect. Back in 2006 lightning struck the house and that destroyed the computer and both drives with her photos.
I have done some testing on the drives and there is a electrical fault in the circuitry so plugging the hard drives into another computer is out. I am certain all of the data still is there on her platters, I just have no way of getting to it that I know of. After seeing the outpouring of help to other redditors in need I thought I would humbly ask for some help. My mother brings up these lost hard drives and memories often and I would REALLY like to be able to bring her some sunshine for all that she has done for me in my life.
Thanks for your time reddit.
TL;DR: | My mother lost all her photos on 2 nuked HDDS, data still on platters and I am looking for ideas. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: I [17M] want to talk to this girl[16F] I barely know but idk how. Advice?
POST: Okay, background. I am very bad at talking to girls. But she's in one of my classes in school, but only for a few more weeks because second quarter is about to end, so the classes change then. We've said maybe two words to each other and that was in September when I asked her for her name so I can put it on a PowerPoint project she was a part of with me. Anyway, besides that, we have not spoken. I want to know what I should do in order for her to notice me.
A guy sits between us, so she's one seat away from me. I may or may not be attracted to her, she's real pretty, has beautiful black hair and such a lovely smile. I've been noticing small things about her in class without even thinking about it and i have kind of just been telling myself, "wow, were pretty alike". I don't want to jump into anything, seem creepy or weird, or none of that jazz. I just want her to notice me so maybe we can talk more & it could lead up to me getting her # so we can communicate outside of school?
TL;DR: | Attractive girl, im shy, barely talk, were in the same class, how do I get her to notice me |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [17M] am in a predicament with a girl [17F] I've known for four years... What should I do?
POST: I'll try to keep this short, basically, I really like this girl who I've known for about 4 years now. We went to the movies last Friday with some others friends to see a scary movie, and we joked a lot, and I held her hand through some of the scarier parts of the movie. I really enjoyed it.
We're hanging out again this Friday and want to try to make a move, but i'm extremely afraid to. She's been my friend for a while now and I don't want to mess that up if she doesn't feel the same way about me.
Are there any subtle hints I can look out for that girls will normally send guys she's interested in? Thanks a lot.
TL;DR: | Interested in girl I've known for 4 years, don't want to mess anything up if it doesn't work out |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [18M] am not sure how to ask out my friend [17F] without potentially ruining our friendship with each other.
POST: So I've had a crush on this girl (been friend for about 4 months solid) for about just over a month and I've been really tempted to ask her out recently and have been kinda eating myself up about what to do.
My fear comes from the thought that she may say no.
I'm afraid that if she says no that things will get awkward between us and we won't talk anymore, with the worst case one of us not being around the same group of friends we have anymore to avoid any awkward situations.
I really do like her so I don't want any shit to happen that makes either of us stay away from each other/our friends. In that sense I suppose I would settle with her being around rather than risk splitting our friendship apart for both our sakes but it kills me not to ask...
so to sum it up;
TL;DR: | How would I ask my friend to go out with me but not to make it awkward between us if she said no? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by sticking it in crazy.
POST: Well a month ago i went onto tinder to get some.
I found a girl she was relativly good looking not my dream but i could work with it.
We met 2 times. I told her i dont think it works out.
I write her a week later that i would love to see her again. [Fuck up1]
She says yes.
We meet, we kiss.
The next day i go over to her. She suddenly tells me that she has no hair and is wearing a wig. I am a hair guy. I love me some nice long hair. Turn off.
I told her i coultn see her again because of reasons (didnt actually told her because of her hair)
-- Radio silence --
2 Weeks later she msgs me and says " i would have fucked you "
Instand boner.
I tell her i wasnt sure if i was looking for something serious or just sex.
She says she thinks the same. I believe her and tell her we could do it. *[Fuck up 2. "the big one"]*
We do it. It was okay but not heavenly.
I believed we have a fwb kinda situation.
She adds me on facebook. She messages me everyday.
Didnt accept yet and i dont want to.
So how the fuck do i turn this around.
TL;DR: | stopped things. Came back. Stopped things. She came back. We both came. I want to end things. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: So I'm in a relationship, but still no "romance" [17M]
POST: So I went out on about 5 dates with her and finally asked her to be my girlfriend [17F] this past weekend. She said yes and we hugged for a prolonged period. Now we've hung out a few more times, and just last night I went over to her place and was home alone with her for over an hour before her family came home and we had dinner. And still there is no intimacy or kiss or anything. Both of us have never had a SO before. I might just be over thinking things.... But I should probably make a move, its just making things awkward.
TL;DR: | haven't worked up the courage to kiss my GIRLFRIEND. What the fuck is wrong with me... |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I'm moving to Alabama in 7-8 months, tell me all about it?
POST: I currently live in the Bay Area, California. I work 2 jobs, totaling 70 hrs/wk, and am still barely scraping by. The president of the company at my part time job has offered me a full time job with the condition that I would need to move to Hoover, AL. to work in the office there. It's an incredible opportunity for me as I will be making more money than I currently make at just my full time job. Based on my research, the cost of living in Hoover, AL. is 40% lower than here in the Bay Area. I will finally have the time and money to go to school (I'll be 30 next month, about time I can go to school!). I will be a lot closer to my mom and my aunt. And there are a few other benefits to me making this move.
However; I know nothing about Alabama other than what us Californians have as stereotypes, and the tidbits that people in our Hoover, AL. office have told me.
What should I know about living in Alabama (and/or Hoover itself)?
Please, no smart aleck jokes about rednecks etc, serious responses much appreciated.
TL;DR: | Lived in CA most of my life, Moving to AL, what should I expect? What will I/won't I possibly like? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [26F] wrote a book with people I know in it. Do I tell them?
POST: I wrote a memoir four years ago that featured my ex-husband. He later told me he felt betrayed that I didn't tell him I was publishing a book about our lives. Fast forward to 2016, I am releasing a second memoir in July.
My question is this: do I let the people in it know? The friends and family I am in touch with I have obviously told and given copies to and all think it is kind of funny and approve, but I have struggled with the people I am not in touch with including old friends and exes. I am not on good terms with some of these people and the idea of sending them a copy of a book with them in it seems a little odd but the idea of them reading it at some point and finding themselves in it without being warned seems odd, as well. None of the depictions are negative, mind you.
My books are not best sellers or anything but the last sold 64,000 copies so a good number of people will read it and I would assume that at some point these people would become aware that I wrote a book about that period of my life and may read it.
TL;DR: | I wrote a book with estranged people in it, do I let them know or let them find out on their own? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I've (27m) been with my girlfriend (28f) for 8 years, We have 2 kids, but I'm not happy, what should I do?
POST: I've been with my girlfriend for 8 years now, we have 2 children but I'm just not happy,
I now she loves me to bits and would be devastated if I left and her, but the feelings not mutual and I can't pretend anymore
I've felt like this for a while now, the problem is she suffers from bipolar and I'm worried how life is going to be for the kids. I also have no family and nowhere to go if I was to leave.
I know some of you will suggest counselling but I know that won't help. We have next to nothing in common, and always disagree on things to eat, watch, do etc....
I may get some hate for this as well, but her bipolar is a problem, she's had it for a few years and I can't live with it anymore. She has no desire to do anything and seems to think the whole world is against her.
Reddit, please give me some advice, Hopefully there's someone here who's been through something similar and can share their experiences?
TL;DR: | I've been with my girlfriend for 8 years, We have 2 kids, but I'm not happy, what should I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Would someone draw this for me? Never have I heard something being described that I have wanted to see so badly. Details within.
POST: On an episode of Friends ([Scene here.] Ross and Rachel are locked out of the apartment and cannot get to their daughter. Rachel, freaking out begins to think of many things that could be going wrong while they are locked out. Ross then compounds and hyperbolizes these things into what follows:
An eagle has flown into the apartment, landed on the still burning stove and catches fire. The baby, jumps across the apartment to the mighty bird's aid. The eagle misconstrues this as an act of aggression and grabs the baby in its talons. Meanwhile, the still running faucet fills the apartment with water. Baby and bird, still ablaze, are locked in a death grip in the whirlpool that fills the apartment.
TL;DR: | A baby and an eagle locked in a death grip in the middle of a whirlpool, while totally ablaze. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: My (15/f) boyfriend (15/m) was made to break up with me because of his mom. We still have feelings for each other, though.
POST: We had been dating for 7 months and his mom was okay with it. But then she decided that we were too young/he needs to focus on his school work. So now we have to just be friends. This includes 'rules' such as: No messaging on Facebook or anywhere else, no 'excessive' talking at school, and basically pretending like we're nothing more than acquaintances. This was especially painful seeing as he was also my best friend. But we both feel the same, and want to continue our relationship as soon as he's allowed to. We are at least allowed to go to dances together. Reddit, how can I continue to show him that that I still have feelings for him without breaking the 'friend/acquaintance' barrier? ( I don't see, after a light search, too many very young people such as myself posting on this subreddit, please don't be harsh with me)
TL;DR: | Boyfriend's mom made him break up with me, have to act like friends, how can I show I still care? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Social Norm question. Did I apologize correctly????
POST: For the sake of anonymity, i shall put this into pseudo-context.
I met this girl randomly on the bus and had a really good quickie talk (about 30 minutes, before i had to leave) about a week ago. We exchanged numbers and so we were texting each other fairly often until while talking about life, she said something along the lines of she gets off from hearing about the stories of messed up children and teens. I then proceed to call her a sadist (incorrectly used word, but meh, couldn't think of anything closer to that on the spot) jokingly.
At which point, she basically gives me the finger (text messages are amazing) and tells me to f*** off. I immediately realized I did something to offend her, I explain my poor reasoning (kid and messed up story and all) and say i'm sorry.
TL;DR: | i called a girl i recently met a sadist jokingly and she now ignores me. I apologized. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [28F] can't stand my [28f] best friend anymore.
POST: My best friend became a mum 4 years ago, and again a year and a half ago, which would be fine, but she's not just a mum, she's a crazy mum.
The kind of mum that puts the toddler on the phone, the kind that cancels on every dinner or coffee date, the kind that can't talk about anything other than her childrens poo and dance lessons. She's a shell of the person that I used to know, we have nothing in common anymore.
I had a horrible life event 3 years ago, and she abandoned me, we worked though it and became close again. Then I moved interstate 2 years ago, in the last year I have visited 3 times, and she has cancelled on a catch up each trip. After the last time (an an unanswered half hearted apology text) she knew I was pissed off, and has been at me all guns blazing with wanting to 'save our friendship'...
I don't want to. She's not the same friend, she's not someone I would want to be friends with. I don't know how to push her gently away now, it feels like a breakup with a clingy boyfriend. I can't very well tell her that she's just a nappy changing shell now.
I might sound like I'm coming across as hard on mums, or not understanding - I have four children, the oldest is 8, youngest is 1, so I am a mum as well, but its not my entire being.
TL;DR: | Best friend had kids, changed who she was, pushes me out of her life, I want out of the friendship. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [20F] just broke up with my long distance boyfriend [20M] of three and a half years. How did you cope or deal with heartbreak?
POST: Three months ago my boyfriend moved away for work. I did not originally want to have a long distance relationship, knowing how they usually end up, but we had been together for over three years and he practically begged me to give it a chance. I loved him, so I agreed. We met in highschool when I was 16 and he was 17 so we have been through a lot together already. I even flew out to see him a few weeks ago.
However, things got rough. The relationship began ideally; he was a gentleman, he treated me so well, etc. Lately, over the past five months, I have been the one trying to make things work. Things were relatively okay, but I felt like I was the only one trying despite him telling me how much he loved me and how it would be okay.
Fast forward to now, and he has put little to no effort into the relationship at all anymore. Be it phone calls, texting, or giving him all the support I know he needed, I received nothing in return except him acknowledging that while still in love with me, he is confused and doesn't think he can do this anymore. Knowing that I deserved better, I ended it, but it's difficult because he is my first everything and I still love him, but I know I need time to find myself and what I want.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend moved away for work, I ended it after he stopped trying. Advice on how to cope/move on? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: As of 12/16, I will be homeless. Reddit, what can I do? (Throw away)
POST: Background;
Throughout high school I had a lot of drama with my family revolving my drug usage. I got into some pretty deep shit, and stole money and pills from my mother and other family members. Things went down hill as time went on and I ended up stealing a macbook from my school (in the hopes of saving money by not having to buy a computer for school in the fall). I went through probation, and managed to convince my family members to fund my first semester of college. In August I received an underage drinking charge which was the icing on the cake for my family. Soon after getting word, they decided that they would no longer fund college, and that all contact would be severed. For the last two months this has put me in a lingering depression.
I have been trying to find a new permanent residence, but all of my connections have fallen through. Now, the semester is almost over and I have no money to my name. I won't even have a way to move my belongings out of my dorm.
TL;DR: | Fucked up a lot, family is taking me off their radar, no money and no home as of 12/16 |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm [21 m] thinking about ending things with my weird friend [21 f] with benefits
POST: My friend and I hooked up about a week before she left to study abroad. She just got out of a bad relationship (about a year ago), and we both agreed long distance sucks and that a relationship would be shitty.
But, we started to talk everyday for the entire semester and realized we get along great. We rarely if ever argue about important issues (religion, politics, family values, etc). It got to the point that I visited her while abroad.
I'm thinking about ending our romantic relationship (or whatever you want to call it) because I have really strong feelings for her and she just can't do it. She's been very upfront about not wanting a relationship and so far it's been fine with me. But now that we're back in the same country again it's getting harder to ignore these feelings.
The only arguments we ever have are over taking things to the next level emotionally. I guess I'm just confused because I like her a lot and would like to continue, but is it fair to either of us?
TL;DR: | Caught feelings for a FWB and don't know what to do. A pretty common issue. But looking for advice. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How do I (17M) ask out maths girl (17F)??
POST: I posted a few days ago and I'm posting this because I need advice. There's a girl I really like in my maths class, I sit with her for 2 hours on a Friday, we have a laugh and get along really well. Our college broke up today for christmas break and I was thinking about asking if she wanted to do something in the holidays.
But this is where the problem is, I have no idea to approach her about it. I don't talk to her outside of college. I don't like the idea of just randomly popping up on Facebook but I know this is the best way to do it. I also have no confidence so it's even harder for me. What do I do?!?
TL;DR: | no confidence, not sure how to ask girl out or even if she likes me, do I ask her out or not?? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Does anybody know....
POST: Hey internet. How've you been? Ok, enough chit chat, let's get down to business. Do any of you wonderful people know where someone could find an alarm clock that, instead of, or in addition to making some annoying sound or turning on the radio, could also turn on a light when the alarm went off? Like, basically a lamp with an alarm function. Or something. I just think it would be incredibly convenient (I live in Canada, in the winter it's dark for like 16 ****ing hours a day) to have the light on when you're trying to wake up for work. So... anybody know where one of those can be purchased?
TL;DR: | I want a lamp that can turn on at a set time (alarm) and don't know where to find one. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21m] thinking about cheating on my gf [21f] because she's not putting out.
POST: Ok well I [21m] feel like a horrible person for really considering this, but I've been with my gf (let's say Jane) [21f] for 6 months without sex. She's actually my 1st gf and we get along pretty well, but We don't have much to talk about. I usually just listen to her and/or compliment her. Plus we never had sex because she is too scared(shes a virgin). I don't really enjoy seeing that much her anymore. Recently I got a girl who basically asked to sleep with me and this is really tempting. I want to explore more but I don't want to mess things up either because my gf is really nice and beautiful compared to a lot of girls. Plus it would break her heart if she found out. Do you think I should do it?
TL;DR: | I'm not getting laid with my gf plus not really satisfied. Got a booty call. Should I do it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How can I [30M] talk to a distant friend/mentor [40s M] about his wife's cancer?
POST: I have a friend who helped me get my feet in my profession almost 10 years ago. We aren't really in touch but I have always appreciated his help and try to get him some good beer when I can.
Recently I learned his wife has cancer. Her prognosis is bad. They're trying something experimental and my understanding is that is her best shot at survival. They also have a young son. I can't imagine how hard this must be for all of them.
I've wanted to call or show up (they live near my family) for a while, but I have no idea how to phrase this. I don't live close enough to help out in any concrete way. I would love for them to know that I care but I don't want to just remind them of how bad their situation is and then hang up.
Is there anything I can do or say that's appropriate? Should I try to do this in the first place?
Thank you kind people.
TL;DR: | My distant friend's wife is very sick and I want to call but don't know a good way to do it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I [24F] tell her [20sF] that he [32M] will cheat?
POST: Long story short my ex is a serial cheater. When we got together he was dating somebody else; being young and naive I convinced myself we were "meant to be" and that since he dumped her for me, everything was fine. He stated multiple times that he had never cheated before.
We broke up for other reasons and are still decent friends. But he's had three girlfriends since, and he has either cheated on, or TRIED to cheat on all of them, with me. He will admit that they think they are in a monogamous relationship, but he always has an excuse for why its okay to cheat (she doesn't really love him, she did something rude, she flirted with somebody else, etc.)
So most recently he texted me wanting to hook up while his girlfriend was on vacation. I was busy and didn't really feel like it, but he even admitted he was just mad at her for something and wanted to get laid to feel better.
I told a friend about this because I thought it was seriously gross, and she's encouraging me to send screenshots to his girlfriend.
Would I want to know? Absolutely. But somehow I still feel it isn't my place (plus we're still friends). Am I obligated to tell her? Nothing actually happened but that's only because I said no.
TL;DR: | Ex is a serial cheater, I have proof he's trying to cheat on his current SO. Do I tell her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My(16M) brother(12M) got testicular torsion and I think it's my fault
POST: I'm on mobile so sorry for formatting or spelling.
So it's basically just the title, my brother got testicular torsion and they had to remove it. I feel like it's most likely my fault because I read that intense activity could cause it and prior to today we were lifting a bit. I'm thinking maybe that caused it. His form wasn't the best and I should've told him to use lighter weight and work up to heavier weight, but I didn't..
Another thing I read was that something like minor injury to the testicle could cause it. And what do you know, I also tried getting in cheap shots at his nuts occasionally. Sort of like in middle school when people would give other people "corndogs" and knee their butts. I know its horrible and I should feel terrible for this and I do and I have to live with it.
Other than that, he's not like super active so there's no way anything else could have caused it. I just don't know what to do, he just got out of surgery and I'm not sure if he knows that it's my fault this happened to him in the first place. I feel like I shouldn't be making a big deal about it because it's him that suffered the most from this. But I just can't help but feel bad about it. I can't imagine what losing a testicle would do to his self esteem. should I tell him that it was my fault and apologize? I don't know how to make it up to him. What do I do?
TL;DR: | I think I was the reason for my brother's testicular torsion and I don't know how to deal with it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I'm poor, I'm in college, and I have an idea... Halp?
POST: I want to start a small business with a few friends. I'm going to try and visit the Small Business Development Center (which I learned about on Reddit a few minutes ago! :D) and the Chamber of Commerce and such... But I was wondering if anyone on reddit has some advice for me? I'm not sure how merchant accounts or third part companies that let me accept online credit card payments work at all. It's all quite confusing and I need to find a way to take credit cards without ending up with a huge start-up cost (since we are all VERY poor college students). Any advice?
TL;DR: | I'm poor, I want to start a business. How do I do it and how do I accept credit cards online? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by eating a spoonful of salsa
POST: The other day my mom made some really delicious salsa. There was tomatoes, and jalapenos and onions, cilantro; all that good stuff. I was about to get ready for bed but I figured I would have a small bowl of salsa before i brushed my face and washed my teeth and everything, so I was enjoying it immensely with a tortilla, and when i finished the tortilla there was still a little bit of salsa in the bowl, so I thought it would be a pretty decent idea to just grab that little glob of deliciousness up with a spoon and eat it that way.
It was then that I realized how spicy the salsa actually was.
Now, it wasn't that bad to be honest but there was no milk in the house so I drank a bit of water, where i decided the burning would be gone soon so, why don't I brush my freaking teeth?
Oh, my god. This made it about ten times worse.
Then, another wonderful idea popped into my head, I thought " *it can't get much worse than this* " So I proceeded to swish with some Listerine.
My mouth was burning for the next 10 minutes or so.
TL;DR: | I ate a spoonful of salsa and then brushed my teeth and use mouthwash. It burned. Quite a lot. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My boyfriend (26m) hit me (21f) last night. How can I apologize to him?
POST: My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over 2 years. We were drinking and I started talking about an ex of mine. He didn't like what he was hearing so he punched me in the back of my head and knocked me unconscious. My friend wants me to go to the police but I love him and I know he wouldn't do it again. He isn't a bad person, he may have a bad temper at times, especially while drinking, but he is harmless.
This is only the second time anything like this has happened. I couldn't leave him, I love him too much and I want to spend my life with him. How can I talk to him, apologize, and ask him to calm down a little better when he drinks? I don't want him to feel like he can't drink, I just want him to be more responsible. Thanks!
TL;DR: | boyfriend "hit" me, it was my fault. I love him and wish he would calm down while drinking. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit. Can anyone give me ideas on how to fix the paint on my car?
POST: I'm a stereotypically poor university student, and looking to make some changes to my car on the cheap. It's an old car, almost as old as I am, and apparently there was a factory fault and most Mitsubishi Magna cars from this age (94 model) have the same problems with the paint. It's just all worn and damaged and frankly looks pretty terrible. It's still such a good car, but I want to try and make it look a little better for various reasons (want/professionalism/ladies/notlookingatitwithdisgust)...
Here's some pictures of it
Apologies for some of them being rotated the wrong way, relatively new to this whole thing.
So aside from the obvious answer of getting the car resprayed by a professional, does anyone have any good ideas of anything cheaply I can do? Is it possible to try and sand it back and just use ordinary spray paint? Or a water resistant type of spray paint? Or am I doomed to looking at this for the next couple of years?
Any advice would be incredible!
TL;DR: | The paint on my car is weathered, worn and looking terrible, is there anything I can do to fix it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/jobs
TITLE: First year college student with virtually nothing to put on a resume. Suggestions?
POST: I'm a first year student going after my CS degree, but I need a job over the summer. The thing is I don't live in a big city. I have basically two towns close enough for work, and nether have more than 15k people. I'm pretty much limited to retail work (Grocery store type work) which is what I'm in right now, but they don't give me enough hours (15 - 20/w). I've scoured every job listing site I can find and I cannot find anything that doesn't require some sort of experience or degree or is a truck driver..
I really don't know what to do here. I've got very little actual experience I can put down other than customer service. I've built several computers and I can build a home network from the ground up (admittedly not hard but worth saying), but I've no programming experience and to be honest I don't think programming is really my thing.
I'm considering applying at the "local" (35 miles away) Best Buy at the Geek Squad, but I already applied at the Staples for the Easytech and never got called. I've also heard very bad things about working at ether of those positions.
TL;DR: | I'm completely lost at what to do for a job and my brain wouldn't let me sleep until I posted this. |
SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: I am freaking out. Do i have schizophrenia?
POST: Hello reddit.
Now I am no writer, but i will try to voice myself and hopefully someone can answer my question. When i was younger (5-9 y/o), I would constantly have a recurring dream, where i was in darkness, almost as if in space, and nothing was around me except for a deep voice that would talk fast then slow, then close and far, it felt almost like a wave. When i would have that dream i would usually be awoken by a family member, because i was crying and yelling or because i was sleepwalking. When i was younger i thought it was God talking to me. Now since the age of 9-18 i have not had another dream like that again, until this year when i turned 19. Except this time it was not a dream. throughout my day I would hear him, talk loud then quiet, then fast and slow, i should also add i cannot understand what he is saying. I have not cried in a very long time (I'm not very emotional), but every time i hear his voice my eyes water and i get goosebumps, and rather paranoid.
Ok that is all, I don't want to bore anyone who took the time to read that terribly written story. Now please can anyone tell me what is going on? If you need anymore info just ask. Please and thank you. Age 19, Male.
TL;DR: | A voice that I only heard in my dreams as a boy, now talks to me throughout my day. What is this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (33F) partner (30M) of 9 years is question whether he is trans. This has come out of left field and I really don't know what to do...
POST: My partner who is Bi (we both are) has never been the most color-by-number standard of masculinity, but a few weeks ago he started asking me if I would still like him if he was a woman, but did it in a sort of joking matter. A few days later, he brought it up again and dropped the bomb that he's been thinking that he's actually trans. From the conversations we have had since, it seems to me that he's not interested in hormone or surgeries.
Yet, a few days later the idea of hormone therapy was something he sounded interested in. He wants to see a therapist beforehand, because he himself isn't sure if transitioning is what he really wants.
Personally, I wouldn't want him to transition, but I am supportive if this is his ultimate choice. I think we should also going to couple's therapy, thoughts?
TL;DR: | Partner of 9 yrs thinks they make be trans. I'm supportive either way, but not sure of what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by singing a song
POST: So this happened about 10 minutes ago.
I work in an office building and next door is a fast food place. Today I didn't bring my lunch so I walked over next door to grab some food. Usually when it's nice out I eat lunch in my car with the windows down and listen to the radio. At this time of day my station of choice usually plays some good stuff. So I'm sitting there playing solitaire on my phone, eating french fries and Nine Inch Nails - Closer comes on. Fuck yes, this is my jam and I start singing along.
Now anyone who knows this song knows how...suggestive the lyrics are (that's putting it lightly). As I'm sitting there singing the shit out of it, I happen to glance up and see a man standing in the parking lot, eating his food, just looking at me. I immediately stfu and turn down the radio to continue my lunch in quiet, pretty embarrassed.
I finish my lunch and go back into the office and lo and behold, I see the guy inside getting help on something from one of my co-workers. What was partial embarrassment is now full-blown mortified.
TL;DR: | sang NIN song too loudly while on break and a guy who heard me was in my office when I got back. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Double monitor issues
POST: So, after a week or two of waiting to get my laptop back from repairs, i finaly took it home with me and plugged all my stuff in to turn it on; power cord, and two extra monitor cords (One being for the monitor itself and an HDMI cable). However, upon opening my laptop screen, it's completely black, and everything has been switched over to the extra monitor. I can't get my own laptop to recognize its own screen, but oddly enough after a couple restarts, when i unplug the HDMI cable it shows everything on just the one extra monitor, but when i plug it in, it obviously switches to two screen, but my laptop screen is still black....
TL;DR: | Got my lenovo ideapad y560p back from shop, its own screen is black and can't be found. What do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [25 M] with a one night stand [21 F], i dont want it to just be a one night stand.
POST: So I met a cute, funny, and intelligent girl the other night. We ended up back at my place and went at it for a few hours. It was great, not just because the sex. But we actually clicked, the next morning was even better. Even though it was short and i just dropped her off. We were having good conversation, laughing, and it just felt like we knew eachother for a lot longer than one night. Asked her if it was cool if i called her sometime. She said yes and we kissed and she got out of the car.
I don't typically do the bar girl pick up, but somehow it just happened. I don't regret it. I have her number and we chatted for a little bit that same morning after i dropped her off. But, now it is just dead air. I told her i was going out later that night, and if she was free to join. I'm thinking she regrets her decision and once the hangover wore off she felt like shit.
TL;DR: | I want to hang out with her again. How would you go about this? The magic 3 day rule? Or what? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [15m] want both a friend and potential girlfriend [15f] to stay away from weed.
POST: I am a Sophomore in high-school. Long story short, there is a girl whom I have know for quite some time (about 4 years) in the freshman class. She, unfortunately, has a group of friends aside from me in the Junior class who are know for their affinities for blazing it. I have wanted a relationship with her in the since that we get along very well, mutually attracted, etc.;this is not my quarrel. I am confident that I could make it happen. The drugs would be a deal-breaker, though. I am more nervous that she is going to get involved with drugs and perhaps drinking, and I have no idea how to stop this. This is for both the sake of a potentially awesome relationship and her own. What do I do?
TL;DR: | I [15m] need my [15f] friend to not get involved with drugs, and I have no idea how to help. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [21 M] can't stop loving my [19 F] ex.
POST: I had this girl five years ago. I loved her very, very much. We had the same interest, we were best friends and I was so happy. And I loved her too much and I got clingy. I wouldn't leave her alone, so she left me.
It was my own fault, and it made it feel even worse. I just want her back.
I met her a few months back and it killed me. Otherwise I haven't seen her since the break-up.
I don't want anyone else. I have been dating, but I have never liked it.
I would rather be alone than happy with someone else.
Please, how do you forget someone?
TL;DR: | I'm still in love with my ex, five years after she broke up with me. How can I forget her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How can I let my girlfriend know that I want to spend time with my friends without her?
POST: My girlfriend quit smoking weed, as well as all other drug use about a week before we started dating. I've been very supportive of this as I don't smoke or drink often, if at all. When she quit smoking she realized that she couldn't see her old friends as much because they smoked so she joined with my friend group, and it's worked very well. I love spending time with her, both with my friends and alone. I've seen her for the past five days straight though because when I tell her my plans I feel rude not inviting her since she's essentially part of the group of friends I spend time with. I just want a little time with my guy friends without her, but I don't know how to tell her. Most importantly, she doesn't have any other friends outside of our now shared group so I'd feel bad leaving her to stay at home without anything to do.
Ages: 18m with 17f
Relationship: 3 Months
TL;DR: | Girlfriend lost her old friends, joined my group, I see her too much and don't know how to tell her |
SUBREDDIT: r/needadvice
TITLE: Adult pedophilic man [f]ucked me over.
POST: I'm a 19 year old girl who was offered help to pay for my college classes by my boyfriend's, mom's ex boyfriend. He use to be a trusted family friend, he's 40+ by the way.
I thought he just wanted to help me, to lend me the 600 dollars with the deal that I'd pay him back in a few months. He has money and this wouldn't have been a burden to him. But he decided he wouldn't help unless I sent him nudes, I didn't want to but I did because otherwise I had no way to pay for school. And it's so important to me. So, reluctantly, I did. He was very explicit, and I sent him all the pictures he wanted, even listened to his sick perverted phone calls. But now he won't even return my calls, he won't return any of my texts... And every Facebook message gets read and ignored. Reddit, I have no other way to get into school, and he owes me this money. I trusted him. What should I do to ensure I get it? Please help.
Do I keep trying to confront him?
TL;DR: | 45year old man offered me help for college. Demanded nudes. Now won't respond to text or facebook. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23M] with my cheated on by SO [25F] one-night stand, any chance of relationship?
POST: Been going out/ dating this girl for 10 months. She told me got drunk and she slept with someone last night. Our relationship was great and almost at an year, I never felt to label the relationship by asking her to be my gf but apparently she was hurt that I didn't ask and raised doubts about my commitment. I had constantly said I was just waiting for the right time to ask her to be my gf and that I always treated her like it. We both agreed to be exclusive to each other from the beginning. She came forward and was accepting of her infidelity and realized she screwed up. The guy she cheated with was someone she said she had a huge crush on and had a fling with previous to us. Any chance of continuing the relationship or how to get over it?
TL;DR: | my "girl" had a one night stand and told me, should I try to continue with relationship or move on? |
SUBREDDIT: r/jobs
TITLE: What are good decent paying jobs for people who don't learn very fast?
POST: I guess that may be a simple question from a simple man. I'm a graduate in psych/marketing, I'm working in management right now and I HATE it. I miss so many little things so frequently, it's likely because of my adhd (I am diagnosed and I have chosen to not be medicated) and I can never really thing straight. Details KILL me.
Before I graduated I worked a job where all I did is lift and throw things while running around and I LOVED IT!!!
BUT - I needed more money, got hired elsewhere, now I need to leave here too. I'm about to break, so much pressure and it is just not the right fit for me. Coming off of multiple 16 hour days with not respect and little sleep is making me crumble!
My questions is, what are some jobs out there where I can assume a subordinate role that allows me to complete somewhat physical tasks on a daily basis?
(assume I have no knowledge of the world we live in, throw anything out there and I will be massively appreciative - the white collar world is NOT for me, college may have been a mistake)
TL;DR: | Slow to learn. Very forgetful. Loves to move fast, also lift then throw next. Suggestions??? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18 M] with my GF [18 F] of two months, need advice on how to accept her friendship with her ex.
POST: Hey! First post here.
So, my GF broke up with her ex of 2,5 years about 8 months ago. I know she is over him, and that she just wants to hang out with him as a friend (their relationship was horrible at the end, but they agreed to break up, with no hard feelings).
Still, I can't relax about it, as this is my first serious relationship. I am not going to deny her hanging out with him, as I trust her completely. Yes, we have talked about it, and she told me the story of their break-up, and told me that she really enjoy our relationship, and that after all, she is with me.
So, guys! What can I do to accept this? I want to learn to live with it, as this is just my mind playing with me.
TL;DR: | My GF is hanging out with her ex, they are just friends, and I need tips on how to accept it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me 40F with my 29M of 6 mos, at what point does "sorry if you cant afford it" factor into what you think will be a lasting relationship?
POST: I have a vacation planned with friends. We go every year to a different nascar track. The destination is always loosey goosey but last night we decided to go to kansas motor speeddway. Its within driving distance and/or within reasonable airfare. The total trip will be less than $600 (if we book now that includes airfare). I can afford this trip.
He doesnt have that great of a job, but still manages to make decent money. Although I am inviting him 2 months before the trip, says he cannot afford it. After having a completely factual, nice, conversation about this..is it wrong for me to go on the trip without him?
TL;DR: | I have a good job, boyfriend doesnt; cant go on vacation with me and my other "good job" friends. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (35f) partner (45m) called me a fat bitch when he was angry at me.
POST: My partner and I have been dating for just over a year and we are getting more serious. But the more serious we get, the more he seems to get angry at me.
He has a bad temper (he admits this) and he often gets irrationally annoyed with me over all sorts of things. He's under a lot of stress at work and it seems to spill over to getting angry at me a lot and we've been having a hard time this past month.
Today he got very annoyed with me over a misunderstanding and he called me a "fat bitch". I don't know how to get past this because once several months ago he called me fat and stupid and we had a very long discussion about how badly that hurt me. He said he'd never say that again.
TL;DR: | BF called me a fat bitch in a heated argument and I feel so hurt I'm not sure I can move past it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/Parenting
TITLE: 3m old going through Ponseti casting for clubfoot. HELP!?
POST: Has anyone else gone through this? He started his treatment a little late, so every time he tries to move his leg and realizes he can't, he flips out. This results in TONS of crying, and him being overtired because he isn't sleeping for more than ~45m to an hour at a time, when my kid usually sleeps about 6h straight at night. This is my first baby and I can't find any information online about how to care for an infant with a leg cast. What can I do to help him be more comfortable? We have 6 weeks of this coming up and I'm pretty sure neither he nor I are going to retain our sanity unless something changes.
TL;DR: | 3month old in a leg cast for the next six weeks and won't stop crying. How do I help him? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [21F] am stuck in the middle between my boyfriend [21, M] and parents.
POST: My boyfriend and I have been together for four years. Never doubted him. Ever. Recently though, he's been making me so sad. My parents want him to convert to Islam (I'm a muslim woman) and get "pre engaged" to me. It's stupid as fuck, but its culture. I don't want to, and he doesn't either. He now hates my family, refuses to meet half way, hates everything about our culture, etc.
Don't get me wrong-I don't want this either. I don't want to change him, but I don't want to lose my parents. They are both making me so sad. I don't care for my culture but I do care for my parents. I love them both and I'm just stuck in the middle and I just don't know what to choose. My boyfriend is just so mad all the fucking time about it. I hate how stubborn he is. But then, he's right. But the way he goes about it he's wrong.
Idk what to fucking do.
TL;DR: | Parents want bf to convert into islam. He is so angry all the time. I'm stuck in the middle |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Being friends after I was rejected, how do I not mess this up?
POST: OK, so yesterday I (28 M) asked her (someone I met at work and have socialised with a bit for a few months) out (30-something F) and got a "I'm not at that stage yet, I'm still in denial about my ex", which I'm fully aware is "I don't want a relationship with you" in code (friend zone or whatever).
I don't know if I've suddenly matured or whatever, but I do actually want to remain friends after this (never have before, always run away like a bloody 14 year old) as she is a good laugh to hang around with and we get on well. It's obviously a bit odd and overly polite at the moment between us, but I'm sure that will pass with time (?). My question is, as I've never been here before, what things should I do/not do so I don't mess this up and lose our friendship. I'm concerned that every contact is going to be seen as me not taking the hint, however if I don't contact her as much as I used to I don't want her to think that the past few months have all been about me wanting to get her pants off. Is it possible or have I already messed it up by asking her out on a date? Go nuts, I'd like to hear horror stories, warm glowing stories about it going well, abuse flung in my general direction for daring to ask a friend out, whatever.
TL;DR: | Asked someone out, got rejected, need hints and tips on what to do/not do so we can remain friends. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [19F] need advice on how to break up with my long distance boyfriend [23M] of 10 months.
POST: I'm hesitant to call our relationship long distance because I live at a university only 2 hours away, but it has been a couple weeks since we've last seen each other.
I just moved to this college after two semesters off. During my time off I met my current boyfriend, who is such a genuinely good, sweet person. I feel awful about wanting to break things off with him, but I just don't feel in love with him and I feel like my education is consuming all of my attention, leaving little left for him.
I planned what I would say to break up with him last week, but on the day that I called to tell him, he told me he had bought me a gift (stuffed animal/foods) and has planned a visit to my college for Valentine's Day. He's coming tomorrow.
I chickened out of breaking up with him after he told me these things because he sounded so, so excited about seeing me. He makes it very clear to me how much he loves me/how much I mean to him.
Valentine's Day is also a very hard day for him as he lost a dear family member on the date, so I am just at a loss of what the best thing to do is!
He's visiting tomorrow. I know this will break his heart no matter when I tell him, but I feel terrible the longer our relationship lasts with me having feelings like this.
Do I tell him tomorrow before he leaves? Should I give it a little bit of time?
TL;DR: | Boyfriend loves me dearly, but I don't feel the same anymore. How is the best way to end this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23 M] with my GF [23 F] of 1 year 3 months lied to me and my family
POST: In September my GF and her BFF decided to go to Greece and Turkey for the month of November. My family warned her about Turkey with all the Middle East unrest and ISIS. After much caution and pleading from me and my family she told us they weren't going to Turkey after all.
Last night i saw her travel plans and she noted down going to Turkey for a week while she`s vacationing. She hasn't told me yet and knowing how we feel about her going i doubt she will tell me or my family. I can only imagine she`s ignored our protests which is fine she can do whatever she likes or she lied to my face about not going, is still going and isn't going to tell me.
I love this girl and i have a few trust issues myself but her lying to me like this makes it hard for me to keep trusting her. It raises questions about what else she could be potentially hiding. I've had previous GF that have lied to me in the past and i don`t want her to be the same.
TL;DR: | Do i confront her or wait in case she does tell me? And if she doesn't tell me what do i do then? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What is the most prejudiced/biased thing you do in your day to day life and why?
POST: For me it has to be tipping at coffee shops. Barring great service, I only do it if the barista / cashier is a younger woman who is relatively attractive. I really just realized I do it when I had coffee and a pastry this morning, it came out to $5 exactly I handed her a 20, and got a ten and five ones back. As I was stuffing the money back in my wallet I realized I was given the 1's so I could tip but the thought hadn't even crossed my mind.
If there is a decent looking girl I feel compelled to leave a tip and would feel bad if I didn't have a dollar or some change to throw in the jar. But when its a guy or a woman I don't find attractive it isn't that I am consciously not tipping them I am just not even thinking about it.
TL;DR: | I realized I only tip at coffee shops if the cashier/barista passes the "I'd bang her test" |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: Tifu by not locking my gfs door
POST: So my longterm gf and her roomate just had a falling out and the roomate is no longer living there. So today after the dust settled and the roomates stuff is gone we go in to her room to clean and get it ready for a new roomate. Under the bed we find 3 sex toys of ours that had been missing (gf has a messy room so not being able to find something isnt odd although it makes more sense now why things would be so hard to find) a few weeks ago we found one of our toys in the shared bathroom despite neither of us remembering doing it. Finally also under the bed we find one of a used condom with one of our wrappers next to it. (Unlikely that it was coincidence as these were the special sex shop condoms and not rando trojans) so the realization hits that while my gf would be at work her roomate would go into her room not only to snoop around but also to borrow sex toys. Also a fun bit, 6 months ago during a trip for more birth control my gf and I tested positive for an sti despite showing no symptoms and obviously not having any other partners (my gf and i are couch potatoes and home bodies, id be damned impressed if she managed to cheat on me as were together 24/7) so we simply chalked it up to one of our past partners and thought nothing of it. Now I'm pretty sure I've figured out how we got it. So remember to lock your doors while you're at work and keep track of your sex toys.
TL;DR: | gfs roomate had been using our sextoys for her one night stands and possibly gave us an sti. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Boyfriend diagnosed me with Asperger syndrome. How to respond?
POST: Reddit,
I'm using a throwaway account to ask for help because I don't know what to do. To start: my boyfriend and I have been fighting a lot. The theme being: he feels unappreciated and I feel stifled.
Today we had an argument which started with him telling me he thinks I have Asperger syndrome. I didn't know what to say. From what I've read, it is unlikely that I do, and his reasons are all things I have developed as a result from being unhappy with the relationship.
I just feel that it isn't his place to diagnose me, and it hurts. His diagnosis feels like a scape goat in order to take any blame/responsibility from the relationship away from himself. I can't find a way to reason my point of view because he keeps insisting that I might have it.
This really ruins the relationship for me and makes it hard to see a future together. I am afraid he'll keep bringing it up in future arguments to put me down. When I suggest positive ways to solve our related problems, he tells me I should deal with them instead and insists that I am not letting him be himself. Please, let me know if I am over-reacting and how I can respond to this. I really need your opinions, whatever they are.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend said I have Asperger syndrome. I want to know if I am over reacting and how to respond. |
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